Monday, August 31, 2009

This is what I need

I do not need an "easy" button. I need a "Get Out Of My Office" button.
Little Animals are in the House!

Yay! I didn't spend the week pinning for them because I knew they were okay and that they would be home soon. I was hopeing to take advantage of all my pet- free time but I really didn't. I had said Ohhh! I'm going to go out after work and do shopping and fun stuff and run around!, but I didn't. I came home and watched TV and hung around. The only thing I didn't do was get up at 5:45 AM to walk the dog. I can't say I missed that a whole lot. But. Monday morning ayem, we're on the road.

Dogger was overjoyed to be reunited with her two favorite things,her stuffed toy and her futon. Dogger and her thrid favorite walked twice today. We walked to the post office this afternoon and this evening we did our old faithful walk around the neighborhood - just like old times pre-blown knees and Dogger did just fine. We did a lot of walking while we were on vacation and I think it really helped to increase her strength and endurance.

My parents told me that on the drive home she also was jumping in and out of the truck unaided but on the way up she needed help, so the trip was really good for her. I think it also helped that I wasn't there to help her get in and out of the truck on the way home.

Mommy needs to get out of her helicopter and let her baby do things on her own. Gawd. I need to be smacked on the snout with a rolled up paper: I am over-parenting my pets! Bad, bad,Diana.

Tiny is also back. I'm so happy. While I haven't missed the early morning walks, I have missed my early morning kitten snuggles. My nose hasn't been licked raw in a week and since he's been gone the bugs are getting a little too brave. Tiny is my very own bug zapper.

While we are talking cats, I haven't seen my two ferels since I came home and I was starting to worry about them a little. Well, as Dogger and I were aproching the house after walk number two, I saw the big gray cat in the neighbors yard. Do you know that as soon as I was back in the house those cats were on my porch? He saw me, called his friend and they came over to welcome me home. And to beg for food.

Tiny was just thrilled with the visiters. He wanted to play. I don't think those cats "play". But it was fun watching Tiny talk trash to them through the door.I may need to find a new name for Tiny, he's not very tiny any more. Or I could just keep calling him Tiny but now in a ironic way but there isn't an ironic bone in his sweet little body and I'm not sure I want an ironic name for him.

My little babies are home.

Saturday, August 29, 2009


and a Happy Saturday to the rest of ya'll!

Friday, August 28, 2009

Friday Kitten Blogging

crouching tiger, hidden baby kitty

I'm not sure if ya'll have noticed, but I've been petless since I got back from vacation. It's weird. The first morning I got up way too early and while I made corrections I'm still getting up too early. I set an alarm, but I've been waking up before it is supposed to go off - I hate that. I blame it on my alarm. I'm so afraid of over sleeping I don't sleep.

I'm also missing my little animals. The house is so empty without them.It's way too big for just one person,but it's perfect for a person, a dog and a cat. There also isn't anyone to talk to, and it turns out I talk to the animals a lot. To make up for this I've spent the last week checking my email a lot and learning to text. On the upside, there aren't any cat boxes to clean out or any poop to bag up, but when I leave  every morning I've started to say goodbye to the house and in the evening I've gotten in the habit of taking myself for a walk. Off leash.

I thought back when I was thinking about this  magical pet-free week that I would go do stuff after work - Something I dream about normally, and I had thought  that when I did finally get home from all my exciting post-work adventures that I would clean the whole house top to bottom. I would have, had my washer hadn't broken. Oh, yeah, I was totally dedicated to the idea. What does this have to do with a top to bottom  house cleaning? If I am going to clean I am going to launder and since everything in my house is covered with pet fur, if I can't launder it I can't clean it.  There is only so much you can accomplish with a vacuum and Windex. Since I couldn't do a portion of my work I didn't do any of it at all. The only thing I did towards "cleaning" was to take out the garbage.

Also, once I was actually in the petless house I lost the desire to clean it. I tidied before I left and it didn't get all that dirty while I was gone. I also just didn't want to.  I didn't really want to do anything. I just wanted to come home, put my fab new sneakers on and watch TV. And then I got my new phone and all I wanted to do was come home, put on my fab new sneakers and play with my phone. That doesn't leave much time for housework.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Why Are KitchenAid Mixers so expensive?!

I  know that they are beyond awesome, but come on!

The birthday fairy can bring me this. I like in it "majestic yellow" but I would be willing to accept it in any of the available colors.
Applause, Applause

I want to hear a big round of Diana Is A Rock Star because I just put my home email on my phone without any help! and  its not one of the email programs that came on the phone, this was a POP deally that I had to get on there my own-self.

It was hard yo.

Now, I may need help getting the phone to stop using my Gmail account. I've been obediently reading my instruction manual and it doesn't say anything about sloughing off unwanted email programs. Maybe there is a Yahoo group  that can help?...

Yahoo Group? I don't need no stinkin' Yahoo group!

 And, now I am an even huge-er Rock star because I just got rid of the unloved Gmail account from my phone! And the crowd goes wild. Really, it does, my DVR player and the Febreze bottle and two hair squishies are just going nuts.

Because I am now totally phone obsessed, I had planned to spend my lunch hour taking all my contact numbers off phone one and adding them to phone two and assigning ringers and all that silly, girly stuff, but shockingly,  after I called the the washer repair place  three times, they got back to me and were able to schedule a guy to come out this afternoon over my lunch hour, to fix the machine - Which as it turned out he could not because he doesn't carry circuit boards in his mini van as its almost always not the circuit board that fails,  something really has to go wrong to cause the circuit board to fail and oddly, a bad latch can do that, it's a domino effect thing. I also learned that its also almost never the timers because the timers are Swedish made and they make great timers that never break.

Those  asshole door latches on the other had  fail all the time and are the root of all washing machine evil.  The repair guy was talkative and very into his work.  If someday you see a book called Zen and The Art of Large Appliance Repair, this guy wrote it.

 It really is a curse to wish that someone will live in "interesting times", that machine has been an "interesting" machine and I believe that it has been cursed since the start. I think they sold it to me cheap just to get the wretched thing out of their store. If it didn't work so well normally, I would be really pissed at it. As it is, it isn't going to be working at all for another week to ten days. Perfect. Which is great because while I'm sitting about the laundry mat I'll have loads of time to play with my phone.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Yeah, um. About today's entry...

I got a new phone. A fancy new phone and like any child who scores a sparkly, flowery new toy I can't pay attention to anything else.  My new phone does approximately the same tasks as my desktop computer plus it has its own GPS unit. And its pink and I love it. So, yeah. I'll be back tomorrow with a real entry. Maybe from my phone.

Have I mentioned that my pets are still on vacation?

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

From my new toy. Testing
There goes the neighborhood

There is now a "Joshua" and a "Gretchen" next door. Gretchen is his "partner" Oh my gawd, the hipsters have landed. I thought they were the ones who bought it, they were the last people who looked at it before the contract sign went up .  I had been rooting for the renter who lives at the end of the street who wanted it for the privacy of its fenced backyard. I would have liked her but I would have hated for her to pay $70 thousand dollars more for her house than I paid for mine. Around these parts they won't be known as "hipsters" , they'll be known as "morons".

And yes, they are hipsters, he has the required goatee and tats and although  I haven't met her yet, she did hook up with a guy with the required goatee and tats. Pot meet kettle.  I am no longer the "white girl",  I am now  officially morphed into the "old white lady". I stopped being the "white girl with the dog"  a while ago when the other white girl with a dog moved in several months ago. Times change. Gawd. There are all these white people in my neighborhood! Any more come in and they'll want to set up a Home Owners Association!

I went over after work and knocked on the door. Nothing. I took a look in the car and it looked like someone was living in it. This did not bode well to me. I had scoped out their basement - Hey! They left the light on! and it looked bleak, all they have down there is a washing machine and a pile of dirty clothes and  a cat box. I was a little worried. I have drug dealer PTSD and I was not feeling good about the car condo or the state of the basement. I went back later and this time Joshua came to the door.  Now I know it looks like crap because the partner is out of town and the guy isn't putting anything away like he told her he would. You know he promised to make great progress while she was gone, he'll make great progress the night before she gets back.

I'm going to go back with voters registration and directions to our voting place - things I did not have today, and I should have. I was woefully unprepared. I didn't even have cookies. Bad welcome wagon lady. I need to come prepared with  helpful information and at the very least my phone numbers and a run down of their neighbors : My next door neighbors: good, their next door neighbor : the drug dealers' crazy sister .  I don't know if I'm going to share that with them, I don't see them needing a tutorial on her, she's pretty self explanatory: Hi. I'm crazy and have a hair trigger temper. Welcome to the neighborhood! What are you looking at?!

What should I take over there when I try again? When I moved in the neighbors brought over literature from burgler alarm companies. I thought I would bring over cupcakes. Times change.

Monday, August 24, 2009


I'm back. I'm here playing with my computer, watching my DVR and sitting on my chair. Just like I never left. Sigh. My animals aren't even here! they're still on vacation. No Tiny, no Dogger, gawd this place is big when I'm all alone in it.

But. I did leave and here's the proof.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Auntie Asks, Auntie gets

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Who am I?

I think I am now offically a wildlife paparazzo. First a deer than a frog now a porcupine.

Friday, August 14, 2009

Friday Kitten Blogging

Lakenenland - A Free Scrap Iron Sculpture Park in Michigan, Upper Peninsula
Lakenenland is one roadside attraction that doesn't exist for the sake of profit. Lakenenland is truly built out of an artist's love, his desire to give something to his fellow man, and maybe just a little bit of good old-fashioned Upper Michigan weirdness.
Yesturday was hot. Unpleasently so.

 I did nothing all day but sit under an umbrellla on the beach and read a detective novel. We bathed Dogger and I found a constilation of bites on her chest and we thought about taking her to the vet today but I treated with peroxide and triple antibitic ointment last night and they look better today so maybe not. She's itching everywhere but there.

No spell check.

Friday, August 7, 2009

Friday Kitten Blogging

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

We're here. I survived two and a half days confined to a space the size of a bath tub with two cats, a large dog and my parents. I think it's important to point out that I did this without the internet. Do you know how often under normal circumstances I check my email or log into Twitter and Facebook?  I was starting to go into withdrawl- in a space the size of a bathtub with two cats, a large dog and my parents.

Last night we went to play trivia and our team placed in four rounds and we won the Einstein round. The Welsh Dragon Extended Family rawks.

Saturday, August 1, 2009


Howdy from Dover, Ohio! The largest Amish community in the world! Who knew?