Meth production for Dummies
A handy DIY tip sheet brought to you by the Department of Justice .
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Weenie
I didn’t go to the funeral. I could have, others in the office did. I am a giant weenie and I didn’t go. I went to one child’s funeral years ago and I pretty much decided that I really didn’t want to go to any others. Ever. Thus far it has been an easy to keep to that. Thank God.
I decided to rationalize not going by telling myself that part of my wanting to go was the fact that I have never been inside of a Mosque and I wanted to see one. I told myself that this was a very shallow and not totally respectful reason and it would be wrong to satisfy my curiosity at a child's' funeral. It seemed like it would be bad karma for me in the long run. It's also a big giant rationalization and I was a big chicken. I barely got through picking out the card, I didn’t think I could make it through the actual funeral.
Instead I spent my lunch hour at Poverty Barn buying bubble wrap to cushion the plastic tubs in the boxes they will be mailed in. Poverty Barn sells bubble wrap, if you’re interested. It’s not the heavy duty kind but I think it will be suitable for the job. The boxes I found at Sam’s Club turned out to be a leetle too long, not by much but enough that the tubs will need a little help sitting still during transit. I’m also going to utilize newspaper to further stabilize them.
That’s a lot of effort to make sure the cookies don’t get crushed through the mail. I mean, it’s just dog treats. But damn it they are going to arrive in the same pristine state they left in.
What else.
Did everyone watch the Charlie Brown Christmas show? I missed the Halloween one and I think I missed it last year too. I try to get the Christmas one at least because it’s so sweet and I love the soundtrack.
I’m in the middle of trying to get the temp up to speed on my job. I keep thinking that I have her at least slightly familiar with how to do the meat and potatoes part of the job when I think of something else I need to tell her. There is a lot to tell her. I held this position for 5 and half years, there are ambulance chasers out there that I've developed a bit of shorthand with over the years and they are going to be in for a rude surprise when they discover another voice on the end of the phone. They are going to have to learn to be polite to a new flunky. I hope they don't take advantage of her.
The good thing about no longer working with the lawyers is that at least now if I have an accident I won’t have to stress over hiring one of the ambulance chasers if I need one. I thought about that every once in a while, you know; would it be a conflict of interest for me to hire some one that I worked as a vendor for? Would it be preserved as showing favoritism? Could I deal with them in the future without it raising eyebrows? would they expect more from me? I know its silly, but I was concerned about that. I work with an awful lot of lawyers, many of them pretty closely and that kind of thing was a concern to me.
But, starting Friday, I can feel free to be as litigious as I want. Guilt free I can hire any low life attorney in the city, I can have a slip and fall at Wallyworld and feel good about calling any one of a dozen skeezy personal injury lawyers I know and sue the bejeeses out of them. Yay!
I didn’t go to the funeral. I could have, others in the office did. I am a giant weenie and I didn’t go. I went to one child’s funeral years ago and I pretty much decided that I really didn’t want to go to any others. Ever. Thus far it has been an easy to keep to that. Thank God.
I decided to rationalize not going by telling myself that part of my wanting to go was the fact that I have never been inside of a Mosque and I wanted to see one. I told myself that this was a very shallow and not totally respectful reason and it would be wrong to satisfy my curiosity at a child's' funeral. It seemed like it would be bad karma for me in the long run. It's also a big giant rationalization and I was a big chicken. I barely got through picking out the card, I didn’t think I could make it through the actual funeral.
Instead I spent my lunch hour at Poverty Barn buying bubble wrap to cushion the plastic tubs in the boxes they will be mailed in. Poverty Barn sells bubble wrap, if you’re interested. It’s not the heavy duty kind but I think it will be suitable for the job. The boxes I found at Sam’s Club turned out to be a leetle too long, not by much but enough that the tubs will need a little help sitting still during transit. I’m also going to utilize newspaper to further stabilize them.
That’s a lot of effort to make sure the cookies don’t get crushed through the mail. I mean, it’s just dog treats. But damn it they are going to arrive in the same pristine state they left in.
What else.
Did everyone watch the Charlie Brown Christmas show? I missed the Halloween one and I think I missed it last year too. I try to get the Christmas one at least because it’s so sweet and I love the soundtrack.
I’m in the middle of trying to get the temp up to speed on my job. I keep thinking that I have her at least slightly familiar with how to do the meat and potatoes part of the job when I think of something else I need to tell her. There is a lot to tell her. I held this position for 5 and half years, there are ambulance chasers out there that I've developed a bit of shorthand with over the years and they are going to be in for a rude surprise when they discover another voice on the end of the phone. They are going to have to learn to be polite to a new flunky. I hope they don't take advantage of her.
The good thing about no longer working with the lawyers is that at least now if I have an accident I won’t have to stress over hiring one of the ambulance chasers if I need one. I thought about that every once in a while, you know; would it be a conflict of interest for me to hire some one that I worked as a vendor for? Would it be preserved as showing favoritism? Could I deal with them in the future without it raising eyebrows? would they expect more from me? I know its silly, but I was concerned about that. I work with an awful lot of lawyers, many of them pretty closely and that kind of thing was a concern to me.
But, starting Friday, I can feel free to be as litigious as I want. Guilt free I can hire any low life attorney in the city, I can have a slip and fall at Wallyworld and feel good about calling any one of a dozen skeezy personal injury lawyers I know and sue the bejeeses out of them. Yay!
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
Tree
My McDonalds doesn’t have its tree up yet. I call it my McDonalds because they are learning my order and only put cheese on my burger about half the time and once they caught the error before I did. Yay. They also seem to recognize me, which is both nice and sad. Nice that they remember a customer, sad that I am in there enough they remember me. My other McDonalds, my dinner McDonalds (now only putting cheese on my food 3/4s of the time!) has their tree up, but it isn’t lit. My lunch hour Burger Yucky has a nice tree, I haven’t been to my dinner Burger Yucky so I can’t comment. I’m surprised though that all McDonalds don’t have the same time table for their Christmas decorating. How unborglike of them.
Way, way, way back in the day when I worked at Jack-in-the-Box, we had lights for our tree, and I don’t remember any corporate decorating issues, but there may have been and I was re-dating day old salads in the walk in when the memos were read. I can’t remember what we decorated our tree with, but it was lit.
The video store had a tree and I think we decorated it with video boxes - I have a memory of some movie featuring a monkey and Harvey Keital but I can’t really remember and but think we used it as the tree topper – the box was yellow and looked star-like to us. We were pathetic; it was what we did with our down time, which there was a lot of, so we were very good at being pathetic. We were not a successful video store.
I don’t remember if the movie theatre had a tree, and I should remember that because I would bet that I would have been the one to decorate it - it would have been a “concession” job not a “door” job and most likely it would have been a “girl” job - I could clean the ladies room but I didn’t have to put together the lobby standees or know anything about the popcorn popper .I’m thinking we didn’t have a tree, it would have been in the way too much of the time.
We of course have one in the office. Last year was the first year that I was not a part of decorating it, and now I’m wondering if we ever put one up at all… It’s fun the first time, if you have the time to waste on it, and everyone offers to help, then no one will help – big with the comments and suggestions but no help whatsoever. I was glad I got out of the duty. I do not love decorating the tree. I enjoy doing my tree but the office tree is not my or my idea of fun, mostly because it also has to be taken down ( not a job I like doing at all, it doesn’t matter who has custody of the tree) and there is always drama about the lights, turning them on in the morning, turning them off after work. It all starts with getting the rights to plug in the extension cord and goes down hill from there. Stupid time wasting garbage. My lasting contribution to the office tree is its very lovely tree skirt. I made it, or really, Alphagal made it and I watched – but I was there.
My McDonalds doesn’t have its tree up yet. I call it my McDonalds because they are learning my order and only put cheese on my burger about half the time and once they caught the error before I did. Yay. They also seem to recognize me, which is both nice and sad. Nice that they remember a customer, sad that I am in there enough they remember me. My other McDonalds, my dinner McDonalds (now only putting cheese on my food 3/4s of the time!) has their tree up, but it isn’t lit. My lunch hour Burger Yucky has a nice tree, I haven’t been to my dinner Burger Yucky so I can’t comment. I’m surprised though that all McDonalds don’t have the same time table for their Christmas decorating. How unborglike of them.
Way, way, way back in the day when I worked at Jack-in-the-Box, we had lights for our tree, and I don’t remember any corporate decorating issues, but there may have been and I was re-dating day old salads in the walk in when the memos were read. I can’t remember what we decorated our tree with, but it was lit.
The video store had a tree and I think we decorated it with video boxes - I have a memory of some movie featuring a monkey and Harvey Keital but I can’t really remember and but think we used it as the tree topper – the box was yellow and looked star-like to us. We were pathetic; it was what we did with our down time, which there was a lot of, so we were very good at being pathetic. We were not a successful video store.
I don’t remember if the movie theatre had a tree, and I should remember that because I would bet that I would have been the one to decorate it - it would have been a “concession” job not a “door” job and most likely it would have been a “girl” job - I could clean the ladies room but I didn’t have to put together the lobby standees or know anything about the popcorn popper .I’m thinking we didn’t have a tree, it would have been in the way too much of the time.
We of course have one in the office. Last year was the first year that I was not a part of decorating it, and now I’m wondering if we ever put one up at all… It’s fun the first time, if you have the time to waste on it, and everyone offers to help, then no one will help – big with the comments and suggestions but no help whatsoever. I was glad I got out of the duty. I do not love decorating the tree. I enjoy doing my tree but the office tree is not my or my idea of fun, mostly because it also has to be taken down ( not a job I like doing at all, it doesn’t matter who has custody of the tree) and there is always drama about the lights, turning them on in the morning, turning them off after work. It all starts with getting the rights to plug in the extension cord and goes down hill from there. Stupid time wasting garbage. My lasting contribution to the office tree is its very lovely tree skirt. I made it, or really, Alphagal made it and I watched – but I was there.
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Planned Parenthood Celebrates World AIDS Day with Free HIV Testing on December 1st!
More than forty million people are living with HIV throughout the world - and that number increases in every region every day. Planned Parenthood Health Systems will offer free confidential HIV testing services on Friday, December 1, 2006 in honor of World AIDS Day.
Planned Parenthood
More than forty million people are living with HIV throughout the world - and that number increases in every region every day. Planned Parenthood Health Systems will offer free confidential HIV testing services on Friday, December 1, 2006 in honor of World AIDS Day.
Planned Parenthood
Paper
We got some bad news regarding one of the women who works in my office. While the rest of us were coming down from a long weekend they were dealing with the death of a son.
It’s very sad and very sudden and another argument never letting your children near a gun. Never. There are no reasons for children to have access to a gun, ever. “But…” NO, you say “What about…” NO , Yeah, but..., NO. None whatsoever. No child “needs” a gun and now one child who had a gun has nothing and his family no longer has him.
Children don’t need to know how to handle a gun, they don’t need to know how to take care of a gun, and they don’t need to know how to use a gun. They don’t even need to know you have one and they most certainly do not need their own. Never, never, never, never. If your child does not have access to a gun they can not shoot themselves while they are cleaning it.
I went over lunch to go get the family a card. The email we got also suggested food prep too and I may do that – no pork though, which means my meat loaf is out – which is officially earmarked for Broskey and Alphagal but I think that death in the family trumps birth in the family when it comes to offerings of food. Moot point though, the loaf is porky.
Back to the card. I did not know the sympathy card industry has become so detail oriented; it’s been a while since I needed a sympathy card (Thank God) and I had a hard time finding a simple card expressing non-specific sympathy. There was “Sorry Your Grandma Died” cards, “Sorry your Grandmother Died” cards, “Sorry your Great Uncle Died” cards, "Sorry your Dad Died”, “Sorry your Father Died” and on and on. I also saw Sorry your Son Died but it was a little more reality based than I was prepared to deal with at the time and about enough to make me break down in the middle of the drug store and I didn’t want that. I also didn’t want to buy a cheap, drug store bought “Sorry Your Son Died” card, if you are going to be that specific about the loss, you should at least go to Hallmark.
In between the “Sorry your Blood Kin Died” cards were interspersed “Sorry Your Dog Died” cards. I love my pets as much as the next guy, but damn, it just didn’t seem appropriate to have a sympathy card marking the death of somebodies Gramma sharing space with a sympathy card marking the death of a Labradoodle. It’s just not right.
I think they needed to reorganize the section. I found it off putting and I have sent people sympathy cards for their pets.
Card over thought, bought, taken out to the car. I tried to address my card. I had the street address and her name but not the husbands. I went back to work after lunch and asked some one I thought would know and they did not.
Me – I was addressing the card and I didn’t have her husbands name. What is his name?
They – Um, Joe?
Me – What is Joe’s last name?
They – Um….And family?
I ended up deciding to just address it to “Sally Surveyor and Family”. I don’t like it that way though; it seems to disregard the husband’s loss. I would have preferred addressing it to either “Mr. and Mrs. Joe Blow” or “Ms. Sally Surveyor and Mr. Joe Blow”. I wish I didn’t have to address anything.
We got some bad news regarding one of the women who works in my office. While the rest of us were coming down from a long weekend they were dealing with the death of a son.
It’s very sad and very sudden and another argument never letting your children near a gun. Never. There are no reasons for children to have access to a gun, ever. “But…” NO, you say “What about…” NO , Yeah, but..., NO. None whatsoever. No child “needs” a gun and now one child who had a gun has nothing and his family no longer has him.
Children don’t need to know how to handle a gun, they don’t need to know how to take care of a gun, and they don’t need to know how to use a gun. They don’t even need to know you have one and they most certainly do not need their own. Never, never, never, never. If your child does not have access to a gun they can not shoot themselves while they are cleaning it.
I went over lunch to go get the family a card. The email we got also suggested food prep too and I may do that – no pork though, which means my meat loaf is out – which is officially earmarked for Broskey and Alphagal but I think that death in the family trumps birth in the family when it comes to offerings of food. Moot point though, the loaf is porky.
Back to the card. I did not know the sympathy card industry has become so detail oriented; it’s been a while since I needed a sympathy card (Thank God) and I had a hard time finding a simple card expressing non-specific sympathy. There was “Sorry Your Grandma Died” cards, “Sorry your Grandmother Died” cards, “Sorry your Great Uncle Died” cards, "Sorry your Dad Died”, “Sorry your Father Died” and on and on. I also saw Sorry your Son Died but it was a little more reality based than I was prepared to deal with at the time and about enough to make me break down in the middle of the drug store and I didn’t want that. I also didn’t want to buy a cheap, drug store bought “Sorry Your Son Died” card, if you are going to be that specific about the loss, you should at least go to Hallmark.
In between the “Sorry your Blood Kin Died” cards were interspersed “Sorry Your Dog Died” cards. I love my pets as much as the next guy, but damn, it just didn’t seem appropriate to have a sympathy card marking the death of somebodies Gramma sharing space with a sympathy card marking the death of a Labradoodle. It’s just not right.
I think they needed to reorganize the section. I found it off putting and I have sent people sympathy cards for their pets.
Card over thought, bought, taken out to the car. I tried to address my card. I had the street address and her name but not the husbands. I went back to work after lunch and asked some one I thought would know and they did not.
Me – I was addressing the card and I didn’t have her husbands name. What is his name?
They – Um, Joe?
Me – What is Joe’s last name?
They – Um….And family?
I ended up deciding to just address it to “Sally Surveyor and Family”. I don’t like it that way though; it seems to disregard the husband’s loss. I would have preferred addressing it to either “Mr. and Mrs. Joe Blow” or “Ms. Sally Surveyor and Mr. Joe Blow”. I wish I didn’t have to address anything.
Monday, November 27, 2006
What I did over my Thanksgiving Vacation
1. Shopped - Did you know stores are open on Thanksgiving Day? Yes, yes they are!
2. Ate. - A Lot.
3. Watched Football - Go Cowboys!!
4. Ate - Some More
5. Shopped - Some More, did not buy a 48" penguin.
6. Shopped - Call me Santa!
7. Ate - All that shopping makes you hungry.
8. Between eating and shopping, I took some pictures
9. Shopped - Sales! Everything is on sale! I saw a 48" penguin, I needed the 48" penguin, I got the 48" penguin!. If you buy too much stuff for other people, it can make you bitter. Make the world a less bitter place, buy the penguin.
True, the penguin might initially scare Dogger, but GLOBAL WARMING!! She might as well learn to live with my fake one before the real ones move in next door.
1. Shopped - Did you know stores are open on Thanksgiving Day? Yes, yes they are!
2. Ate. - A Lot.
3. Watched Football - Go Cowboys!!
4. Ate - Some More
5. Shopped - Some More, did not buy a 48" penguin.
6. Shopped - Call me Santa!
7. Ate - All that shopping makes you hungry.
8. Between eating and shopping, I took some pictures
9. Shopped - Sales! Everything is on sale! I saw a 48" penguin, I needed the 48" penguin, I got the 48" penguin!. If you buy too much stuff for other people, it can make you bitter. Make the world a less bitter place, buy the penguin.
True, the penguin might initially scare Dogger, but GLOBAL WARMING!! She might as well learn to live with my fake one before the real ones move in next door.
Thursday, November 23, 2006
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
Then and Now
Then
On Nov. 22, 1963, President John F. Kennedy was assassinated while riding in a motorcade in Dallas. Suspected gunman Lee Harvey Oswald was arrested. Vice President Lyndon B. Johnson was sworn in as the 36th president of the United States.
Now
On Nov. 22, 2006, It's a sort of no-man's land, and no one's in charge out here. We keep a watch on each other," said Bob Goodman, who sells assassination-related newspapers at Dealey Plaza. "There are certain unwritten rules, and there's a sort of self-policing."
Then
On Nov. 22, 1963, President John F. Kennedy was assassinated while riding in a motorcade in Dallas. Suspected gunman Lee Harvey Oswald was arrested. Vice President Lyndon B. Johnson was sworn in as the 36th president of the United States.
Now
On Nov. 22, 2006, It's a sort of no-man's land, and no one's in charge out here. We keep a watch on each other," said Bob Goodman, who sells assassination-related newspapers at Dealey Plaza. "There are certain unwritten rules, and there's a sort of self-policing."
Hot and Cold
While I was shopping for the sweater, I started to wonder why we don’t do clothing drives for the homeless and needy over the summer months. Don’t they get hot too? When I see them over the summer they are always swathed with coats and sweaters and sleeping bags – ya know, because it’s not as though they have an extra closet to store them away in or access to under bed storage. They are their storage units. But. Which leads me to, why don’t we ever see suitcases- for-the-homeless- drives? We pledge blankets and winter coats so that these poor people don’t freeze to death but what about the resultant storage needs? Give a man a fish v. Give a man a fishing pole …
Doesn’t anyone ever think of them in August? It’s hot and the homeless are wandering around looking like extras from Gorky Park. Why, doesn’t anyone want to get them shorts and tee-shirts? Why don’t we have plastic palm trees set up the vestibules at churches with pleas to purchase sunglasses or flip flips for the disadvantaged?
I mean if they can’t get coats and sweaters on their own where are they supposed to get shorts and tee shirts? Do warm weather clothes drop from the sky while cold weather clothing must be formally requested? I don’t understand. Why isn’t anyone doing a bathing suit drive in July? It gets cold and all of a sudden we care about them? Why don’t we care about them when its warm and the spend the summer dressed like Eskimos?
At most public pools, they won’t let you swim in a snow suit. Some places won’t even let you swim in a tee shirt. How are the homeless supposed to cool down? If we ran into them at the pool are we worried we would have to talk to them? Are we afraid they would sneak home in our tote bags along with our sunscreen? Winter clothes make them more bulky and less likely to sneak home tucked away in our handbags?
“The homeless are all around us”. Yes, but the rest of the year we pretend they’re not there. We feel guiltier about them freezing to death than we do about the chances of them dieing from heat stroke?
I just thought about this the other day after I was looking for the sweater. I’ve never gone out looking for a pair of shorts or a tee shirt for the needy, but every year I’m off looking for inexpensive winter coats and other cold weather outerware, who supplies warm weather clothing and if there is a supplier out there, why don’t they also supply coats and gloves?
What is it about cold weather that makes us want to help our fellow man? I know I don’t feel the same push to help during the summer months that I do the first time I have to pull on a jacket - I’m cold! Somewhere out there someone else is cold! I must get them a coat!. In August when I want to die from the heat, I do not automatically think I’m Hot! Somewhere out there someone else is hot! I must get them a pair of shorts! . I mean, screw you if you die from exposure during the summer months, but in the cold weather you must be attended to immediately? Do we think that Gawd cares more about us when we are cold than when we are hot?
I guess I’m thinking about this because it got cold here all of a sudden. I woke up and it was cold. I went out over lunch, still cold, now raining - to buy packing tape – the dollar store didn’t have any! It’s not like this is a time of year that nobody uses packing tape. Whatever.
I was driving back to work (the grocery store had packing tape, I paid too much for it.) and I saw the guy that lives along Western Blvd. I see him a lot. He’s mean. Anyway, I saw him wrapped in a blanket, shouting threatening things at passers by at the sandwich shop he was leaning against and I thought Oh, that poor man! It’s so cold. But, I see him all summer shouting threatening things at passers by and I don’t think Oh, that poor man it’s so hot!. Why is he more sympathetic now? He’s scary during the summer months too and I don’t want to get him a tee shirt.
While I was shopping for the sweater, I started to wonder why we don’t do clothing drives for the homeless and needy over the summer months. Don’t they get hot too? When I see them over the summer they are always swathed with coats and sweaters and sleeping bags – ya know, because it’s not as though they have an extra closet to store them away in or access to under bed storage. They are their storage units. But. Which leads me to, why don’t we ever see suitcases- for-the-homeless- drives? We pledge blankets and winter coats so that these poor people don’t freeze to death but what about the resultant storage needs? Give a man a fish v. Give a man a fishing pole …
Doesn’t anyone ever think of them in August? It’s hot and the homeless are wandering around looking like extras from Gorky Park. Why, doesn’t anyone want to get them shorts and tee-shirts? Why don’t we have plastic palm trees set up the vestibules at churches with pleas to purchase sunglasses or flip flips for the disadvantaged?
I mean if they can’t get coats and sweaters on their own where are they supposed to get shorts and tee shirts? Do warm weather clothes drop from the sky while cold weather clothing must be formally requested? I don’t understand. Why isn’t anyone doing a bathing suit drive in July? It gets cold and all of a sudden we care about them? Why don’t we care about them when its warm and the spend the summer dressed like Eskimos?
At most public pools, they won’t let you swim in a snow suit. Some places won’t even let you swim in a tee shirt. How are the homeless supposed to cool down? If we ran into them at the pool are we worried we would have to talk to them? Are we afraid they would sneak home in our tote bags along with our sunscreen? Winter clothes make them more bulky and less likely to sneak home tucked away in our handbags?
“The homeless are all around us”. Yes, but the rest of the year we pretend they’re not there. We feel guiltier about them freezing to death than we do about the chances of them dieing from heat stroke?
I just thought about this the other day after I was looking for the sweater. I’ve never gone out looking for a pair of shorts or a tee shirt for the needy, but every year I’m off looking for inexpensive winter coats and other cold weather outerware, who supplies warm weather clothing and if there is a supplier out there, why don’t they also supply coats and gloves?
What is it about cold weather that makes us want to help our fellow man? I know I don’t feel the same push to help during the summer months that I do the first time I have to pull on a jacket - I’m cold! Somewhere out there someone else is cold! I must get them a coat!. In August when I want to die from the heat, I do not automatically think I’m Hot! Somewhere out there someone else is hot! I must get them a pair of shorts! . I mean, screw you if you die from exposure during the summer months, but in the cold weather you must be attended to immediately? Do we think that Gawd cares more about us when we are cold than when we are hot?
I guess I’m thinking about this because it got cold here all of a sudden. I woke up and it was cold. I went out over lunch, still cold, now raining - to buy packing tape – the dollar store didn’t have any! It’s not like this is a time of year that nobody uses packing tape. Whatever.
I was driving back to work (the grocery store had packing tape, I paid too much for it.) and I saw the guy that lives along Western Blvd. I see him a lot. He’s mean. Anyway, I saw him wrapped in a blanket, shouting threatening things at passers by at the sandwich shop he was leaning against and I thought Oh, that poor man! It’s so cold. But, I see him all summer shouting threatening things at passers by and I don’t think Oh, that poor man it’s so hot!. Why is he more sympathetic now? He’s scary during the summer months too and I don’t want to get him a tee shirt.
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
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