Waaaaaahhhhhh
Popular music icon Ray Charles has died.
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Thursday, June 10, 2004
The Thumb Also Rises
I slammed my thumb in a cabinet drawer yesterday. It hurt then and it hurts now. I now have one Goth digit. I fell like I should dye some of my hair black and be kinda depressed for about ten minutes a day, or listen to two cuts from a 90s issue Morrissey CD.
The pain is less today. Yesterday I kept myself occupied keeping track of my pulse by the pain in my thumb. I also realize that I use that thumb a lot. Like right now? Used it to hit the space key. Ow.
I noticed that I use that thumb for a lot of things, holding on to the phone, maneuvering a mouse, using the TV remote! Putting Doggers leash on, turning the house alarm on and off, unlocking the front door. That was a big Ow.
Since yesterday I have not lost track of where my thumb is. I always know where it is because I am always doing something to remind me where it is, "where is that thumb? Oh, right here! On my pen. It feels that I am holding the pen to tight. I never knew that about my thumb you don't really pay attention to your parts until one of them hurts. Your ankle for instance, if it isn't hurt do you even notices it? of course not! its one of the most under appreciated body parts. Sprain your wrist and its kind of a drag, sprain your ankle and you might as well be bedfast. Or, your back. How often do you even think about your back? Stay out in the sun tool long and you will think of little else. Bend over the wrong way and you will become down right obsessed with it. Same with your neck, as long as it is doing its job, a very mellow body part, keeps your head in the same place you left it, houses the often painful throat another easily forgotten about body part, ya know until you are conscience of swallowing and then… you can't stop swallowing. Just try. It's not going to work. And if you annoy your neck in anyway, you might as well not even get out of bed.
But anyway. Back to my thumb or more specifically my thumbnail or as it prefers to be called "The Black Opal".
The Black Opal also has serious issues with my toothbrush. It let me know earlier that it would appreciate it if I could work more with my left hand until it felt more like itself again. This would be fine but I have included my left hand in very few things, it doesn't know how to do anything. It hardly knows the rest of me is here. My whole left side feels "left out" at times. Occasionally it demands my attention by hurting itself. Then I am all about whatever it is. As a child I pissed off my left arm so badly it felt that the only way to get my attention was to break itself twice. There is nothing like wearing a cast to really bring you closer to your body part. My left ankle is also the ankle more likely to twist itself when it wants to dialogue with me. Right talkative it is too. Loud mouthed bastard.
But this time, this time it is the right thumb that wanted my attention. Thus far it hasn't shared with me why. I wonder if it really wants me to stop chewing my nails? Or it saw a nail polish color it thought looked good. Whatever it was, thumb, I'm here and I'm listening.
I slammed my thumb in a cabinet drawer yesterday. It hurt then and it hurts now. I now have one Goth digit. I fell like I should dye some of my hair black and be kinda depressed for about ten minutes a day, or listen to two cuts from a 90s issue Morrissey CD.
The pain is less today. Yesterday I kept myself occupied keeping track of my pulse by the pain in my thumb. I also realize that I use that thumb a lot. Like right now? Used it to hit the space key. Ow.
I noticed that I use that thumb for a lot of things, holding on to the phone, maneuvering a mouse, using the TV remote! Putting Doggers leash on, turning the house alarm on and off, unlocking the front door. That was a big Ow.
Since yesterday I have not lost track of where my thumb is. I always know where it is because I am always doing something to remind me where it is, "where is that thumb? Oh, right here! On my pen. It feels that I am holding the pen to tight. I never knew that about my thumb you don't really pay attention to your parts until one of them hurts. Your ankle for instance, if it isn't hurt do you even notices it? of course not! its one of the most under appreciated body parts. Sprain your wrist and its kind of a drag, sprain your ankle and you might as well be bedfast. Or, your back. How often do you even think about your back? Stay out in the sun tool long and you will think of little else. Bend over the wrong way and you will become down right obsessed with it. Same with your neck, as long as it is doing its job, a very mellow body part, keeps your head in the same place you left it, houses the often painful throat another easily forgotten about body part, ya know until you are conscience of swallowing and then… you can't stop swallowing. Just try. It's not going to work. And if you annoy your neck in anyway, you might as well not even get out of bed.
But anyway. Back to my thumb or more specifically my thumbnail or as it prefers to be called "The Black Opal".
The Black Opal also has serious issues with my toothbrush. It let me know earlier that it would appreciate it if I could work more with my left hand until it felt more like itself again. This would be fine but I have included my left hand in very few things, it doesn't know how to do anything. It hardly knows the rest of me is here. My whole left side feels "left out" at times. Occasionally it demands my attention by hurting itself. Then I am all about whatever it is. As a child I pissed off my left arm so badly it felt that the only way to get my attention was to break itself twice. There is nothing like wearing a cast to really bring you closer to your body part. My left ankle is also the ankle more likely to twist itself when it wants to dialogue with me. Right talkative it is too. Loud mouthed bastard.
But this time, this time it is the right thumb that wanted my attention. Thus far it hasn't shared with me why. I wonder if it really wants me to stop chewing my nails? Or it saw a nail polish color it thought looked good. Whatever it was, thumb, I'm here and I'm listening.
Wednesday, June 9, 2004
Worst.President.Ever.
This was sent in by Alert Reader Tony. The headline is his.
Visit www.Misleader.org for more about Bush Administration distortion.
THE DAILY MIS-LEAD
===============================
BUSH CHANGING HIS STORY ON PRISON ABUSE SCANDAL
President Bush has claimed that the prison abuse scandal at Abu Ghraib was "disgraceful conduct by a few American troops,"[1] and had nothing to do with broader administration policy. But according to a March 2003 Pentagon memo, Bush administration lawyers issued legal justifications for torture, specifically claiming, "President Bush was not bound by either an international treaty prohibiting torture or by a federal anti-torture law". [2], the revelations have now forced the President to backtrack from his previous denials of culpability, with the White House yesterday admitting for the first time that Bush did, in fact, "set broad guidelines"[3] for interrogation in Iraq - a tacit admission that Bush himself "opened the door"[4] to the torture tactics in the first place.
Now, the U.S. Senate is demanding the full Pentagon memo from the Bush administration. But the President has refused, instead dispatching Attorney General John Ashcroft to tell "lawmakers he won't release or discuss"[5] the memo, even if he is cited for contempt of Congress. This is the same Ashcroft who "conveniently declassified"[6] internal Justice Department memos in an effort to slander 9/11 commissioner Jamie Gorelick. It is also the same Bush administration that leaked the classified name of a CIA officer[7] in an effort to intimidate a former ambassador who had debunked their false WMD claims.[8]
Sources:
1. Presidential Speech, White House Website, 5/24/04,
http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39670.
2. "Lawyers Decided Bans on Torture Didn't Bind Bush", The New York Times,
6/08/04, http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39671.
3. "Memo on Torture Draws Focus to Bush", The Washington Post, 6/09/04,
http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39672.
4. "The Roots of Torture", Newsweek, 5/24/04,
http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39673.
5. "U.S.'s Ashcroft Won't Release or Discuss Torture Memo (Update 2)",
Bloomberg.com, 6/08/04,
http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39674.
6. "Mr. Ashcroft's Smear", The Washington Post, 4/20/04,
http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39675.
7. "Mission to Niger", townhall.com, 7/14/03,
http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39676.
8. "White House "warned over Iraq claim", BBC News, 7/09/03,
http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39677.
============================================================
This was sent in by Alert Reader Tony. The headline is his.
Visit www.Misleader.org for more about Bush Administration distortion.
THE DAILY MIS-LEAD
===============================
BUSH CHANGING HIS STORY ON PRISON ABUSE SCANDAL
President Bush has claimed that the prison abuse scandal at Abu Ghraib was "disgraceful conduct by a few American troops,"[1] and had nothing to do with broader administration policy. But according to a March 2003 Pentagon memo, Bush administration lawyers issued legal justifications for torture, specifically claiming, "President Bush was not bound by either an international treaty prohibiting torture or by a federal anti-torture law". [2], the revelations have now forced the President to backtrack from his previous denials of culpability, with the White House yesterday admitting for the first time that Bush did, in fact, "set broad guidelines"[3] for interrogation in Iraq - a tacit admission that Bush himself "opened the door"[4] to the torture tactics in the first place.
Now, the U.S. Senate is demanding the full Pentagon memo from the Bush administration. But the President has refused, instead dispatching Attorney General John Ashcroft to tell "lawmakers he won't release or discuss"[5] the memo, even if he is cited for contempt of Congress. This is the same Ashcroft who "conveniently declassified"[6] internal Justice Department memos in an effort to slander 9/11 commissioner Jamie Gorelick. It is also the same Bush administration that leaked the classified name of a CIA officer[7] in an effort to intimidate a former ambassador who had debunked their false WMD claims.[8]
Sources:
1. Presidential Speech, White House Website, 5/24/04,
http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39670.
2. "Lawyers Decided Bans on Torture Didn't Bind Bush", The New York Times,
6/08/04, http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39671.
3. "Memo on Torture Draws Focus to Bush", The Washington Post, 6/09/04,
http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39672.
4. "The Roots of Torture", Newsweek, 5/24/04,
http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39673.
5. "U.S.'s Ashcroft Won't Release or Discuss Torture Memo (Update 2)",
Bloomberg.com, 6/08/04,
http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39674.
6. "Mr. Ashcroft's Smear", The Washington Post, 4/20/04,
http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39675.
7. "Mission to Niger", townhall.com, 7/14/03,
http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39676.
8. "White House "warned over Iraq claim", BBC News, 7/09/03,
http://daily.misleader.org/ctt.asp?u=1157167&l=39677.
============================================================
Least Comic Standing
If you watched Last Comic Standing last night, and you should've cause LCS rocks, you saw that they went to "Dallas", they did not go to Dallas, they went to Addison and the Addison Improv. I performed on that stage once upon a time. The show dissed the folks in the fly over states yet again but at least they got out of their planes to check them out. Last Comic Standing airs again tonight on NBC, unless they choke and air Raygun instead.
If you watched Last Comic Standing last night, and you should've cause LCS rocks, you saw that they went to "Dallas", they did not go to Dallas, they went to Addison and the Addison Improv. I performed on that stage once upon a time. The show dissed the folks in the fly over states yet again but at least they got out of their planes to check them out. Last Comic Standing airs again tonight on NBC, unless they choke and air Raygun instead.
Yup, He's Dead.
Since I don't actually watch television news I have missed out on the mass public mourning. Or as it really is, the mass public mourning of FAUX news. The democrats are saying nice things about the man too. But folks said nice things about Nixon too, after he was safely dead.
I do want every one to notice, it has been more then three days and he hasn't risen. I think the GOP's dream of a Risen Reagan isn't going to happen.
The Reagan cultists are out in force. Some loon out in California is beating the drum to get Ron on the dime or the $5 or the $10, really anything he can put in his pocket and fondle.
They do add, however it would only be half of the dimes, FDR being allowed to stay on the other half. A nation divided. Blue and red dimes. Who would have thought it?
There is also talk of adding Ron to Mount Rushmore. The Reagan cultist are just completely out of their minds, despite the recent body blow of Nancy refusing to let them start up a Ronald Reagan University. That must have been a bummer. After all the successes of Reagan this and Reagan that, all the streets, the Airport, the parks. All of a sudden a refusal. Their desire to paint the world Ronny hit a snag. Nancy said No! , preferring to keep the educational focus on the Ronald Reagan Library.
And he surrounded himself with such good people as well. James Watt, Ollie North, such fine upstanding men. And his administration did such good work in Afghanistan! Keeping those oil fields safe from the commies and making friends with such wonderful future leaders. Bin laden! Ron just loved handing him weapons and money. Good Times! If it wasn't for freedom fighters such as him and his fun bunch gosh, 3000 Americans would still be alive, the police state under which we live wouldn't exist and our solders wouldn't be dying in a hostile land.
Thanks Ronnie for feeding, training and arming what would become the Talaban! With friends like those who needs enemies to murder your own people.
I'm sure that will come up in his eulogy, right around the spiraling debt and rape of our public lands.
Or exploding homelessness or the administrations refusal to recognize AIDS or GRID as it was referred to then - it didn't become AIDS until it started to kill non-gays, you couldn't call it Gay Related Immune Disorder when it was killing heterosexual four year olds.
Of course, to Ron it was still, somehow, their fault.
I remember when he was shot. I was in the sixth grade and the teachers were herding us out to the playground for recess when over the loud speaker the school secretary announced The President has Been Shot! , of course everyone over the age of twelve breathed a whisper of thanks he did not get shot here. Not in Dallas, not again. One of the little boys raised his arms and said "YEAH! he was quickly hustled into a classroom. That is all I remember about that.
I just checked, he's still dead.
Since I don't actually watch television news I have missed out on the mass public mourning. Or as it really is, the mass public mourning of FAUX news. The democrats are saying nice things about the man too. But folks said nice things about Nixon too, after he was safely dead.
I do want every one to notice, it has been more then three days and he hasn't risen. I think the GOP's dream of a Risen Reagan isn't going to happen.
The Reagan cultists are out in force. Some loon out in California is beating the drum to get Ron on the dime or the $5 or the $10, really anything he can put in his pocket and fondle.
They do add, however it would only be half of the dimes, FDR being allowed to stay on the other half. A nation divided. Blue and red dimes. Who would have thought it?
There is also talk of adding Ron to Mount Rushmore. The Reagan cultist are just completely out of their minds, despite the recent body blow of Nancy refusing to let them start up a Ronald Reagan University. That must have been a bummer. After all the successes of Reagan this and Reagan that, all the streets, the Airport, the parks. All of a sudden a refusal. Their desire to paint the world Ronny hit a snag. Nancy said No! , preferring to keep the educational focus on the Ronald Reagan Library.
And he surrounded himself with such good people as well. James Watt, Ollie North, such fine upstanding men. And his administration did such good work in Afghanistan! Keeping those oil fields safe from the commies and making friends with such wonderful future leaders. Bin laden! Ron just loved handing him weapons and money. Good Times! If it wasn't for freedom fighters such as him and his fun bunch gosh, 3000 Americans would still be alive, the police state under which we live wouldn't exist and our solders wouldn't be dying in a hostile land.
Thanks Ronnie for feeding, training and arming what would become the Talaban! With friends like those who needs enemies to murder your own people.
I'm sure that will come up in his eulogy, right around the spiraling debt and rape of our public lands.
Or exploding homelessness or the administrations refusal to recognize AIDS or GRID as it was referred to then - it didn't become AIDS until it started to kill non-gays, you couldn't call it Gay Related Immune Disorder when it was killing heterosexual four year olds.
Of course, to Ron it was still, somehow, their fault.
I remember when he was shot. I was in the sixth grade and the teachers were herding us out to the playground for recess when over the loud speaker the school secretary announced The President has Been Shot! , of course everyone over the age of twelve breathed a whisper of thanks he did not get shot here. Not in Dallas, not again. One of the little boys raised his arms and said "YEAH! he was quickly hustled into a classroom. That is all I remember about that.
I just checked, he's still dead.
Tuesday, June 8, 2004
How many more days until the election?
I am hopeful this this is a joke, just a little giggle some one came up with. A bit of creative writing.
I am hopeful this this is a joke, just a little giggle some one came up with. A bit of creative writing.
Have I mentioned how much I love cable?
COMMANDING AN AUDIENCE: The big three networks planning live coverage of Ronald Reagan's funeral procession to the U.S. Capitol on Wednesday evening and the state funeral that follows, along with the national funeral service at the Washington National Cathedral on Friday.
from E!online
COMMANDING AN AUDIENCE: The big three networks planning live coverage of Ronald Reagan's funeral procession to the U.S. Capitol on Wednesday evening and the state funeral that follows, along with the national funeral service at the Washington National Cathedral on Friday.
from E!online
The Banana Republican?
"Bush has broad authority on torture, lawyers concluded"
The Wall Street Journal says this page down.
A U.S president should never under any circumstance have reason to have his name used in that sentence. The president has authority to order torture? What has become of us? Any minute now he's going to show up wearing epaulet's and an admirals hat.
"Bush has broad authority on torture, lawyers concluded"
The Wall Street Journal says this page down.
A U.S president should never under any circumstance have reason to have his name used in that sentence. The president has authority to order torture? What has become of us? Any minute now he's going to show up wearing epaulet's and an admirals hat.
Word to The Wise
When people who call themselves "your friends" provide you with the opportunity to slam your thumb in a cabinet drawer, say NO! Don't listen to anyone who tries to tell you that "all the cool people" are doing it.
Ignore them when they say Cam Diaz has been sporting a blue thumb since Memorial Day or that Paris Hilton slammed both hands in a cabinet drawer right before she had sex with it and now has 10 blue nails!!! as well as an exciting new venerial disease.
Don't listen! they are trying to pull you in to their sick, sad world of pain. Having a blue nail does not make you "cool", it is not a quick route to social acceptance! you now have a nail that will eventually fall off. Yum.
When people who call themselves "your friends" provide you with the opportunity to slam your thumb in a cabinet drawer, say NO! Don't listen to anyone who tries to tell you that "all the cool people" are doing it.
Ignore them when they say Cam Diaz has been sporting a blue thumb since Memorial Day or that Paris Hilton slammed both hands in a cabinet drawer right before she had sex with it and now has 10 blue nails!!! as well as an exciting new venerial disease.
Don't listen! they are trying to pull you in to their sick, sad world of pain. Having a blue nail does not make you "cool", it is not a quick route to social acceptance! you now have a nail that will eventually fall off. Yum.
Alumna Foil
Dear Alumni Association,
Hi. Remember me? I'm the one who told you that you don't offer a giving level low enough to match my level of desire to give you money? Yeah. You remember. I think I also noted that my major was a little light on the Real World aspects of my field? Suggesting that all of us would spend every minute of our professional lives not only working solely in our field but working in our field as Actors! Directors! and Designers! And while raising us to work in the non-profit fields on the entertainment plantation, not offering even one class on grant writing?! But preparing most of us to work primarily in the service industry? I might have also alleged that they did this on purpose to make sure that restaurant industry would not run low on over educated, under motivated employees t who just don't care enough to spit in customers drinks... And that my degree prepared me the most for was standing on street corners with a "Will Deconstruct Mamet For Food" sign?
Bygones.
I got a MasterCard™ in the mail. It has a picture of Old Main on it. This tells me that I got it through you, alumni society. Which reminds me that I got the card because I wanted an alumni tee -shirt. I never got my alumni tee shirt, and now they hauled off and renamed the school and any tee shirt I would get now would have the dumb new name on it. I am annoyed and not working in my degree field.
And when I checked the date on the card it seemed to reflect that I had had this card for some time. That means that you tricky bastards talked me into the card several years ago and then kept me, some how from paying too close attention to the lack of shirt by renaming the school. I know that you yourselves didn't rename the school. I see that. I also see you didn't work very hard to block the change, but it wasn't your fault. I could also further get your butt out of the fire with me by suggesting that the name change was so hard on you that you just couldn't deal with sending me my shirt. I was bummed out too. I still want my shirt.
I think that you could send me one. Or two, or whatever you feel I would be the most comfortable with. I do believe that I am the only alumna east of The Mississippi and I would make your only inroads into this part of the country.
I also want to know if while you are sending me a tee shirt or two or whatever you think I would be the most comfortable with, that you also send me a chrome license plate frame. My plastic one I got with my diploma is almost ready to go to the great License Plate Framery in the sky and I would like a new one.
I would be totally willing to be the Point person for a whole new wave of Alumni Groups west of the Mississippi. I and the rest of your lost sheep would sit around in our official Alumni Tee Shirts and talk about how much we (love!) to hate you.
Sincerely,
Dear Alumni Association,
Hi. Remember me? I'm the one who told you that you don't offer a giving level low enough to match my level of desire to give you money? Yeah. You remember. I think I also noted that my major was a little light on the Real World aspects of my field? Suggesting that all of us would spend every minute of our professional lives not only working solely in our field but working in our field as Actors! Directors! and Designers! And while raising us to work in the non-profit fields on the entertainment plantation, not offering even one class on grant writing?! But preparing most of us to work primarily in the service industry? I might have also alleged that they did this on purpose to make sure that restaurant industry would not run low on over educated, under motivated employees t who just don't care enough to spit in customers drinks... And that my degree prepared me the most for was standing on street corners with a "Will Deconstruct Mamet For Food" sign?
Bygones.
I got a MasterCard™ in the mail. It has a picture of Old Main on it. This tells me that I got it through you, alumni society. Which reminds me that I got the card because I wanted an alumni tee -shirt. I never got my alumni tee shirt, and now they hauled off and renamed the school and any tee shirt I would get now would have the dumb new name on it. I am annoyed and not working in my degree field.
And when I checked the date on the card it seemed to reflect that I had had this card for some time. That means that you tricky bastards talked me into the card several years ago and then kept me, some how from paying too close attention to the lack of shirt by renaming the school. I know that you yourselves didn't rename the school. I see that. I also see you didn't work very hard to block the change, but it wasn't your fault. I could also further get your butt out of the fire with me by suggesting that the name change was so hard on you that you just couldn't deal with sending me my shirt. I was bummed out too. I still want my shirt.
I think that you could send me one. Or two, or whatever you feel I would be the most comfortable with. I do believe that I am the only alumna east of The Mississippi and I would make your only inroads into this part of the country.
I also want to know if while you are sending me a tee shirt or two or whatever you think I would be the most comfortable with, that you also send me a chrome license plate frame. My plastic one I got with my diploma is almost ready to go to the great License Plate Framery in the sky and I would like a new one.
I would be totally willing to be the Point person for a whole new wave of Alumni Groups west of the Mississippi. I and the rest of your lost sheep would sit around in our official Alumni Tee Shirts and talk about how much we (love!) to hate you.
Sincerely,
Monday, June 7, 2004
This administration is all about the compassion
The ruling was a defeat for the Bush administration, which argued America's relationships with other countries were on the line in the case...
The administration objected to letting Holocaust survivors go to court to get their property back. When the administration wanted to go to war with Iraq and our relationships with other countries were actually on the line it didn't matter. Now the administion is worried about irking former nazis? Read the whole story
here
The ruling was a defeat for the Bush administration, which argued America's relationships with other countries were on the line in the case...
The administration objected to letting Holocaust survivors go to court to get their property back. When the administration wanted to go to war with Iraq and our relationships with other countries were actually on the line it didn't matter. Now the administion is worried about irking former nazis? Read the whole story
here
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