Bye, Bye, Trucky

I am officially a driver of a mini-van. Me. My mini-van. A mini-van is parked in my driveway and it lives there.

I needed a new car. I mean really needed. If truck had been a horse it would have been put out to pasture years ago. Poor truck. My first car, my last new car. It was all shiny and chrome-y and pretty. It has a very sporty swoop on the side. Sigh. My first car. My baby truck.

I worked really hard to find my truck. I must have looked at every light truck manufactured in 1993. There were a lot of light trucks manufactured in 1993. Most of them well out of my price range. The salesmen kept showing me all these fabulous trucks with padded seats and dark windows and automatic door locks. Bastards.

Then I found my truck. Weep. Such a pretty little truck! It was even a "girl" truck. No stick "boy" truck for me. This was to be a Ladies Truck. I did my damnedest to fem it up too. I always have had flowered car mats and pink steering wheel cozies just to make it clear what kind of person drove this truck. No tacky naked babe mudflaps for my baby.

This truck took me to my first job and then to my first "real" job. It helped me move into my first apartment, drove me across country and helped me move into my first house. It was a four-wheeled extension of me. My truck.

And now. My poor truck is going away. I drove to work this morning in a minivan.

I mean, truck was falling apart. I haven't had a functioning radio in three years, the tape player wore out before I even left Dallas. The breaks are getting squishy and the windshield cleaner jobbie hasn't worked in years. There was a hole in the windshield or unknown origin, the sunvisers were warped and the plastic around the airvents shattered in my hands. I was careful and the exterior was still pock marked with touch ups. Some asshole took out my rear passenger lights, and right after I brought it home I got re-ended.

But

Today going to lunch I had to make a 37 point turn to get out of my parking place. I don't know how long the van is and I was afraid of hitting the car behind me.

I haven’t figured out how to radio off with out turning it down all the way, the parking break thingy is in the wrong place and the clock isn't where it's supposed to be. When I hit the gas, the van goes forward! What is that about? It doesn't even stop to think about whether that is a good idea or not! It just goes. No backbone! When I hit the breaks? The van stops! What if it was a mistake? What if I really meant to hit the gas? Again, no backbone! When I get the radio on, it turns on! The nerve.

And the volume control? another backboneless feature, and the option of multiple pre-sets! One person doesn't need 10 available stations. A person should sit in silence and think about stuff. And if a person doesn't want to think about stuff? A person only needs three choices of stations. Really.

The A/C works very well. A person should be hot, it makes you drive less far and causes you to evaluate each trip before hand. If it's too hot, you might not go. Saves gas and promotes a healthy environment!

I'm having to learn all these things. The truck was me. I always knew where "we" were. I shouldn't be frustrated. I did have eleven years to learn the truck. I'll need more then 11 hours to learn the van.