1. Raleigh Ribfest . I thought I was seeing a carnival, I was seeing Ribfest. No rides but infinitely better food. I'm not sure how welcome Rocket would be, so its going to be a solo flight.
2. Re-tape and generally tidy up Rockets barrel because...
3. Best Dog Trick contest, Crowder Park - I saw this in my weekly Parkgeek email and couldn't resist! I'm going to take Rocket and show off his barrell rolling skills in public for the very first time. I was glad to see its not until Sunday afternoon, so he and I will have plenty of time to hone and practice those skills, we've been working on his riding skills lately, so a review is in order. Maybe while we are there I'll meet someone who can tell me how to improve my non-training game on teaching him to roll on the barrel properly, because I've hit a wall.
Thursday! Finally! Not quite as awesome as Friday but so much better than Wednesday.
On my way home this evening, while driving through downtown, I saw something new. A Carnival, downtown! I can't wait to take Rocket there.Well, its not like I'm panting in anticipation, but its fun and its different from what I did last week. I also think that since it has been awhile since Rocket has been to the fair that he needs to go back to just experience it again, to make sure he likes them and can handle all the chaos.
We went to one in Knightdale when he was much younger and he did well, I think he will like this one too. He likes busy, crowded places and he loves being around people and he isn't afraid of loud music or amplified voices or sudden loud noise.. I hope to go in the early evening and take pictures of the lights - I have skipped the state fair the last couple of years and I miss the lights, I'm not much for the actual midway because I don't eat the food and I'm not into rides or games in the least. I am all about the lights though.
I think what I might do is to drive to the carnival after dinner and after our initial shake down trip there to see what there is to see before the lights are on, so I can plan out what I want to get pictures of. The parking lot its in is very small and I'm afraid space is going to be a problem, there will be no where to back up and get the big picture. I might even see if there is anything there I want to eat - I give carnival food credit for keeping it real, I don't like Food Truck food because its over produced. has too many ingredients and is inevitably too expensive by half.
I'm not going to park on top of the carnival, because if I do find something to eat, I'm going to have to walk whatever it ends up being off. Walking is our friend. Carnivals are our friends, kind of, if you wash your hands frequently and leave your wallet at home.
My parents cat still hates me. She has been with me for a week and she hasn't come out from under the bed nor has she stopped hissing at me. Normally we have reached a detente by this juncture.
I need to move the dogs barrel from its new place, the ground there is less flat than I had thought. I moved it because I wanted to be in the shade, but we're going to have to go back into the sun.
Peaches are really, really good.
My toaster oven does indeed make toast but I need to learn which "toast" setting to use to not toast the bread unto paneling. This may explain why we still have free standing toasters.
I still feel bad about Robin Williams, but ow I'm getting mad at his family for knowing he was wildly depressed, but didn't think he needed to be supervised? He was incredibly bright, had a history of depression and was currently suffering from severe depression as well as a new Parkinson's diagnosis, and no one was keeping an eye on him? Really? He was in an acutely mentally ill state and no one thought to maybe institute an "eyes on" program? Really? No one thought maybe he should be getting care somewhere? Were they waiting for the acutely mentally ill individual to make the suggestion himself? This was neglect and someone should have been paying attention.
I've spent the evening writing Rockets initial appointment with the NC State Vet School Behavioral Medicine unit. Our appointment isn't until the middle of September, but I want to get as much down as I can. I have already forgotten a lot of incidents because so much of it is now everyday stuff. Aren't all dogs emotionally disturbed? Doesn't everybody deal with this? What problem? WE DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM! I BRING MY DOG WITH ME EVERYWHERE BECAUSE I LOVE HIM AND I AM GOOD DOG PERSON!
In the few minutes this evening I wasn't trying to figure out how much information I could fit onto a PDF, I was taking care of a craving. I have wanted cinnamon toast for weeks! I have dreams about wheat toast and butter and cinnamon-fake-sugar. I decided that today was the end of the road for that, well actually, tomorrow morning is going to be the end of the road for that and I'm going to see how good a toaster my toaster oven actually is.
I thought eating before going to the store was supposed to be a good idea. It was not. I clearly need to up my serving size. I hit the doors and immediately decided that I needed to get some peaches. I had a peach last week and it rocked my world, and I need more world rocking. I bought four. Then I remembered that I had run out of sugar free popsicles! This is end of the world stuff here! So I got some popsicles! I tracked down the bread aisle and was a little horrified.
To buy bread you have to buy an entire loaf of bread! Since I have become a little more sensitive, okay, a lot more acutely aware, of how many carbs I take in, I have developed a carb phobia, and this seemed like a lot of carbs, even if they are healthy whole wheat carbs, that is a lot of carbs. I dug around a little and found the shortest loaf of whole wheat bread I could find. It was still a trial.
I think my body wants me to feed us more carbs, I'm been very vigilant but perhaps I have been too vigilant and in response to my vigilants, my body wants more. It is difficult to ignore peer pressure from your body and in general its a bad idea to ignore strongly worded messages from your body. Its good practice to to not ignore See Me! sticky on your bathroom mirror. Because to do so is to invite eating disorders and no one wants to be the poor sad thing that the even poorer and sadder Lifetime Movie is based on.
had another great weekend doing nothing! Well, not "nothing", I mowed both yards and got the dog a new pooper scooper.
I slept late both days and lounged around and did as much nothing as I could get away with. I didn;t totally do "nothing, I did blanch some veggies and went food shopping and I put gas in the car. I also watched a lot of TV.
Rocket and I took some nice walks, one of which I badly misjudged how hot it was and neither of us enjoyed it, but you gotta do what you gotta do and we needed to go out and walk. The dog let me know that while I may have needed a walk, he did not need a walk. He needed to nap on the couch in the air-conditioning.
I have been posting status updates on Operation Dog Trick, but this week in an an awkward in-between stage and it really isn't photogenic. This part is really the hardest. I know he can do this, I know he knows
he can do this. He is going to do this.
I spent a week just getting him comfortable getting on the barrel himself and just hanging out there. I then started to edge the bricks away from the barrel so it would move a little when he was getting on and when he was actually on it. This has been challenging.
I didn't help by getting ahead off myself and moving the bricks too far too fast so now we have to move them back a bit and start over a little. This is going to be harder than I thought, he is really good at getting on it and staying on it as long as it is not mobile, a little movement goes a long way and I am trying to get him used to having to get his balance while he's up there because its all about him getting and keeping his balance.
We have a lot of time though.
When I am not torturing the dog for my own pleasure, I torture myself. I spend the evening watching clips of Robin Williams on various TV shows over the years. Whoopie Goldburg posted an episode of of a Comic Relive themed Hollywood Squares that he was on. It made me sad.
They all make me sad and I am going to watch ALL OF THEM, do you have some I haven't seen yet? Where are they? Send me a link, the pain is healing. I really hope they televise his funeral or the service or something because we need closure.
I was somewhat, and this will sound horrible, I was "heartened" to learn he was in the early stages of Parkinsons and for me, I was like Well, that makes sense! I get it! He knew he had a terrible debilitating disease! Ah Ha! It almost made it make more sense than if he just decided to do it because he was having a bad day. We all have bad days and we all wake up in the morning and walk through the door. Does Michael J. Fox had bad days? Did anyone call him and set up an icon to icon talk?
I went to bed last night with ankle deep water in my basement. It had been raining viciously for hours and I should not have been surprised, but I was. I had taken Rocket out to pee and the whole time I was begging him to just pee, please just pee damn it I noticed the sump pump was running non stop.
I said Good going pump!
And then I went inside and took a quick look-see in the basement.
I shrieked. There was water. A lot of water. All over the place. The pump was still working its little heart out but waster was pouring under the door and as soon as it could be sucked away, it was replaced. I moved what I could out of the way and tried to be calm. because really, being in hysterics was not going to stop the rain, and frankly, this was not my first trip to this rodeo. It was also not make the water stop pouring from under the door and it would cause splashing and I didn't want to get even more wet... Also, I had just dosed myself with some Benadryl and I was not physically capable of hysteria. Good timing on my part, I think. Better living through chemistry.
And then I noticed, as I wandered around in the flood, that the basement is tiled back, back toward the back wall, back toward my water heater. It was wet, sitting in a puddle.
So flooded basement and out pilot light. Super awesome.
I kept myself awake for a little longer than normal while I waited for the deluge to stop, it had to stop, I mean, how much more could there be up there? And it did finally run out and slowly stopped raining. I went back down and checked and it, and with the rain stopped, the pump had a chance to catch up and the flood was shrinking down to puddles. I said a prayer for the pump and went to sleep.
In the morning the basement was damp, but no long as wet. I turned the dehumidifier on and went to work. Later, after work the floor was still wet but the puddles were shallow and getting further part.
I knew it was time to look to the cause of it all and I went outside to the stairwell of doom, and made a dozen trips up and down the stairs clearing the sitting water out from the bottom of the stairs. The dog thought the nasty, dirty run off was really neat!
In was glad he had something to do because I had a lot of work getting the well cleaned out and the mud removed from he drain. It was a dirty job and I didn't know who to ask to do it for me. So I did it! Yay for me coming to my own rescue!
While I was being all Wonder Woman with the drain, dog was getting his jollies playing in the gallons and gallons of filthy, muddy, stinky water I was throwing into the yard. He thought it was less neat when he learned that playing in dirty water leads directly to being bathed in clean water.
We are both very tired, we worked hard. Well, I worked hard, he played hard.
The internet was sad today. At work we spent the day processing and pointing out newer and more sad stories about him and It .The AKC was even sad. letting us know that he had a pug. We also learned that he bonded with a gorilla and the gorilla is now also shocked and saddened. All Gods creatures are sad now. Its raining here, even the sky is sad.
I am sad.
Its important that we all be sad. His family is sad, his friends are sad, his fans are sad and now we know, his little dog is sad.
I think we also need to not fetishize suicide or claim that people who kill themselves are some how heroic or that they should be immune from judgement or shame or their deaths are more honorable than a natural death. Its a rotten, hateful thing to do to your world and the people in it.
Mental Illness prevents you from thinking about those people who are not you, its the true calling card of mental illness. Not the crazy behavior, dress or speech Not the manic energy or the black sadness. Its the inability to care about how your behavior, dress or speech affects other people. Because you are the only person in your world. You live in your world, everyone else lives in an another world, different and dull and lacking. Your world is exciting and bright and terrifying. Mentally illness makes you selfish. It makes you want to die.
It rained Saturday. All Day Saturday. The dog got zero walks and I got next to nothing done. I did however, go research fresh water aquarium fish with Broskey and Alphagal.
My research concluded that salt water aquarium fish are sexy. Very sexy, sexy fish. Almost obscenely beautiful with bright colors and beautiful patterns. They stand out, they are eminently fuckable. These fish know how to party, they know they are desirable and wanted and they know you think they are desirable and and that you want them. Salt water aquarium fish are very high maintenance creatures, very high self esteem creatures, like all highly desirable, wanted creatures, are - probably real douche bags as well.
The fresh water aquarium fish are pious, modest, clearly reverent creatures.You really needed a sign to tell you that the tank actually did have something in it. Generally these fish appear to have poor self esteem and low self worth, I think they must cry a lot. When they weren't emo poetry, these fish would totally pick you up at the last moment from the airport in the middle of the night. Fresh water aquairum fish are very nice fish, friendly fish but you do not want to fuck these fish. They spend a lot of time hiding behind rocks or pretending to be rocks, and generally being as unobtrusive as possible. They probably apologize a lot. The smartest and probably least pious fishes school together to give you the impression that they were not a mass of reverent, modest fish but actually a larger, possibly attractive fish that you may actually want to spend time with.