Bittsey-er and Piece-r

I was going to walk Dogger the other day while I was doing laundry , I multi-task. Anyway, all the clothes I normally wear were unavailable and the only clean things left I had were in the closet. There is nothing that says "I am Walking My Dog" like "Bridesmaids Dress". So I had to keep looking. I finally found a pair of capri pants. I put them on, added a tee shirt and sneakers and thought I was on my way. No. I really can’t wear capris. Everyone else does. They sell them at Sams(tm)! Everybody wears these. I think they make capris for men now. Everyone looks good in them. I thought that I was part of the "everybody", so I once upon a time I bought a pair.

"Looks Good On Everybody" is really false advertising. I was like the capri pants picture in the attic. I looked like a street person. I looked at me and went to go find some change to give myself.

Okay. So I went back to the closet and I found a cute top and then I found a cute pair of sandals and I looked in the mirror and I was so cute I can’t walk the dog like that. I can’t walk around my neighborhood looking like some tourist I would end up on some barbeque, the other white meat.

I don’t leave on vacation for weeks but my clothes and my dog are going on vacation soon and I have to get my and her things together. Packing for me is one thing. Packing for my pets is another. I’ve been putting things in a box for Dogger for weeks. My stuff I throw in a bag, I find a paper back and I’m good to go in ten minutes, I spend three weeks thinking about what I need to bring with me, but I can get it done in 10 minutes. I just bring everything I own and sort it out later. There is the chance I might need that bridesmaids dress while I’m vacationing in the forest and if I don’t bring it, I’m going to need it and I just want to avoid walking down the isle in my capri pants.

The dog takes weeks to get ready. I have to think about all of her things. Her tennis balls, her chuckit! toy we haven’t played with since last winter. I went to throw a ball for her in the backyard last week and she had forgotten the concept playing catch. She ran after it but after that she looked at me like "What am I supposed to do with this? You want this? Back? What?".

It’s going to take work. So I have her toys and her mood leashes - the really short one, the regular one, the extendo leash, the longer extendo-leash her pretty collar, her pinch collar, her sweater, her nail clippers, brush, comb, shampoo. This amazing array of things. She needs to be ready for any eventuality. She could be asked to be the flower girl in a wedding and I want her to be ready.

The Kitty on the other hand. I’m just going to zip him into his bag with his lovey and his rabies vac tag and be done with it. Cats don’t have wardrobe issues, they don’t have mood leashes, and they aren’t going to be bathed. If this mythical wedding falls out of the sky and they want Kitty to be the ring bearer, I hope the ring isn’t worth much cause Kitty will have it appraised before he hands it over. Dogger might swallow the ring, Kitty would pawn it.