Giving Tree


Every year at Christmas they put a couple of trees up in the entry way of the church and decorate them with construction paper decorations with Christmas list requests from the needy. I saw them the week they put them up this year and I said “Oh, I should do that” and I forgot to go look at them when I left.

Okay. I went out of town and missed a week, I came back and the trees were still there but not as heavily decorated. I managed to hold on to the thought that I wanted to go get something off it and I finally did.

There were more left then I had thought. I had a choice. Some of them I had to turn down out of hand, A kidney, size M, too expensive, Bed Spread for 14 year old girl, too many variations! What kind of 14 year old girl? Hello Kitty or tie die? flowers or funky? retro or metallic? fake fur or Egyptian cotton? It would just lead to a long drawn out anxiety attack and I’m too selfish to go there and if they do want this back this weekend there is no way I could get it shopped for, angsted over, returned, reshopped for and finally settled on that fast. An Extra Large Mens shirt finally! Affordable and easy! Okay. Now all I have to do is actually remember to buy it and have it back by the deadline, this weekend.

Dear Mr. XL,

What are you going to use this shirt for? Are you cold and need flannel or do you need a dressier style to wear for job interviews? Did you mean a button up the front shirt or would you rather go for a slip on style? Do you like turtle necks? Are you going to be wearing it over other layers? Like a jacket or should it tuck in? Are you a solid color or plaid kind of guy? How do you feel about stripes? If the shirt is for the warmth do you want a very heavy flannel shirt or are you going to be wearing under an existing sweater? Or do you prefer a thinner flannel shirt because you are warm natured? Do you need a sweater? Do you need a sweater more then you need a shirt? Do you like rugby shirts? Should I be looking for husky XL or tall XL? Are you even male? Or are you a large woman who prefers men’s clothing because they are made better?

Are labels important to you?, does it matter where I buy it or are you tired of the clothes you buy for yourself at Sams and want nicer stuff from a different store? Do you have a home? Would you scare me if I saw you on the street? Are you one of my neighbors? Would I know you?...

After stressing over it and circling the men’s shirts for way too long, I finally decided on a nice blue plaid flannel. It seems nice. It was also cheap, so I started to think maybe I could a 3 pack package of undershirts for him too.

This is Sams. There are no 3 packs of anything there. The only undershirts I found came about 12 to a package and cost more then the shirt. So, no undershirts for Mr. XL. I’m going with that he all ready as adequate under shirts or he would have asked for them, or he did ask for them and they were on another paper ornament and someone else has all ready taken care of it, or not and he can just recycle old tee shirts, if he has any.

Will. Resist. Urge. To. Make. This. More .Complicated.

I also got a roll of film developed while I was there; much to my surprise it did not have on it the series of shots of The Kitty wearing antlers for his Holiday Page at Catster. I was bummed. I was looking at the other cats with holiday pages and there were very few awake cats wearing head gear and most of them appeared to be photo shopped. Mr. Kitty was awake, alert and wearing a hat! This needs to be put where people can see it!