Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Excitement

I was at lunch before. I went to my favorite McDonalds, ordered my little happy meal, pocketed my newest MLP toy and sat back to enjoy my new book. It took about 15 pages to turn “enjoy” to “endure”. I can all ready tell I’m not going to like this book.

My plan this weekend had been to find The Gun Seller at the book dealer out at the flea market. That was a bad plan. I had to find another book that actually was at the guys’ booth. I was there for an hour and came out with two titles, The Devil Wears Prada because I recognized the title and heard good things about it 18 months ago when it came out in paperback, and then I got Generic Suspense Novel to read when I tore the TDWP because its supposed to be so funny, and kewl and all that. I hate The Devil Wears Prada. Perhaps “hate” is too strong, lets try “issues with heroine that make the book hard to enjoy because I all ready want to slap her a grand total of 15 pages in”. This is the same reason I had issues with The Nanny Diaries.

The plots of these two books are generally the same – sweet, innocent girl fresh to the city looking for her first big break, finds job with Power Woman and discovers that Power Women make terrible bosses. The Heroine spends the next 250 pages trying to make the crazed bitch she works for happy while The Heroine struggles to not lose her soul and eventfully breaks free of Power Woman to either A) Work for another Power Woman, but this time she won’t let it get to her and she won’t take that kind of shit again, B) becomes Power Woman and vows to not be a bitch, while she takes baby steps on her own assistants throat or C) Leaves Power Woman and goes to work for Max who is nicer to her and better to work for because he’s a man and doesn’t have to prove anything by making her life a living hell. Whatever. We. Get. It – if you’re a woman working for another woman it’s going to be tough and only tough women survive in Business and also Women In Business are bitches, grow a pair or get out of the elevator.

So. Why am I reading this? I don’t know. I’m taking it out of the car and tomorrow I’m going to start on Generic Suspense novel while not as popculty , won’t make my head pound. I also hate the heroine in the book because her first job out of college, landed on her first interview, is not only in her field but pays $12 thousand dollars more then I get now, two real jobs neither of them in my field, out of college.

What else happened at lunch? I was reading my book and still semi enjoying it, while really enjoying my fries more, when someone sits down at my table. “Hi!” I said. I figured from behind my book that I knew who ever sat down, since who sits down with a stranger at a McDonalds when there are empty seats all over? I look up expecting to see someone from work. No. It was a street person. I looked at him, he grunted at me. “Um”, I said. “LoseintonohablaEnglish?”. Nothing. I repeat myself, hoping that he won’t want to deal with someone speaking a foreign language, with a bad accent and who is probably just gibbering at him anyway. I start again “LoseintonohablaEnglish”. Nothing. It is not his language and he is not offended by my bad accent and he has no problem with gibberish.

Lo Siento
Lo Siento
LO SIENTO!! (With added book rattling action)

He’s not moving and I’m running out of foreign language to gibber in. I get up, throw my food away and go to the counter to tell them they have a problem and I’m leaving because of it. No one will talk to me and by this time the guy noticed I wasn’t gibbering at him and had lurched over the family sitting next to me. I have half a mind to contact McDonalds and tell them about how much I was not Lovin’ It.

No comments: