Share and don’t share alike


I am sitting at the computer. Word is warmed up, brilliance is nearing boil and wisdom is flowing. Life changing, conscience raising lit-er-at-ure is awaiting the green light. I am ready to impart. I am ready to blog.

Nudge, nudge

I can not bring forth wisdom imparting while being nudge, nudged

Me - What?

Dogger - Um. Nephdog, Nephdog has my toy.

Me - You have other toys.

Dogger - I want that toy.

Me - I see your ball over there. Play with your ball. Can’t you tell I’m trying to impart here?

Dogger - Nooooooo! I need that toy that Nephdog has! Make him give me my toooooooooyyyyy. Sob!

Me - I have wisdom to impart. Go away.

Dogger - Make Nephdog impart my toy back.

Me - Go slurp your water.

Dogger slurps and then lies nose to nose with Nephdog and watches him play with her toy. She in time takes the toy away from Nephdog. This is a toy that has been living under the ottoman in the living room for months and she had totally forgotten about it, now it is her favorite.

I am back at the keyboard.

nudge, nudge

Me - Dogger stop it! Oh. Nephdog, hi sweetie. Stop It.

Nephdog - Make Dogger give me the toy back.

Me - You gave it her.

Nephdog - She tricked me.

Me - Eat one of her other toys.

Nephpdog - No, I need that toy. I need it back. Now.

Me - Sorry.

Nephdog - Nobody loves Nephdog...

Me - Everyone loves Nephdog.

Nephdog - Nobody loves Nephdog. His people left him. His other people left him. Nephdog gets passed around and handed down and left alone. Nephdog is unloved. Poor Nephdog. No one will feed Nephdog. Nephdogs toys get taken away. Nephdog is sad.

Me - Nephdog got to ride in the truck! And Nephdog got to ride in the Minivan! Nephdog has been wandering around in circles on Doggers bed for fifteen minutes. Remember the good times Nephdog!

Nephdog - Dogger is bossy.

Me - Dogger can be a brat. Sorry.

Nephdog - I want my people!

Me - Do you know when Tuesday is? Your people will come for you the day after the day after today!

Nephdog - Waaaaahhhhhhhhh! They have left me to never have my toys to myself again forever!!!

Me - Those are Doggers toys...

Nephdog - I have no toys!!!! I have been abandoned to the elements!! Wahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

Me - You have been “abandoned” for two days to a bigger bed, a larger space to play in, a companion dog and regular walks.

Nephdog - My life sucks! I. Want. That. Toy.... And? The bed makes a funny sound! My bed doesn't make funny sounds when I walk on it!! NOBODY LOVES NEPHDOG WHIIIIINNNEEEEWooooWOOooooNOBODYLOVESNEPHDOG!!!I WANT TO GO HOOOOOOMMMMMEEEEEE!!!!!... hmmm, what's this?

Dogger - NEPHDOG IS SHOUTING!!NEPHDOGISSHOUTING!!!NEPHDOGISHOUTING!!! Nephdog is eating my toy!!

Me - SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP! I am IMPARTING here dogs! Leave me alone!

(silence)
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Nudge nudge

Dogger - Nephdog has my toy.