Rrrwwwrrzzspz!


Dear Mommy and Daddy,

I don’t know what they told you about this place but whatever they told you it was a lie! The food is awful! I was homeless and I managed to eat better than I do here. It tastes cheap and you know how much I detest the taste of cheap.

I also thought that you had arranged for a single. I have had to share a bed the entire time I have been here. This is outrageous! Not only having to sleep on a bed with a human, but also with another cat! I am sure we talked about this before you made reservations. I can be sure that this must be a mistake on their part. I know you wouldn’t make me share a bed with anyone. You respect my need for privacy and alone time, my deeply held believe that my personal space is more important than yours, this is a very important distinction for me - mine is important, everyone else’s is negotiable.

There is no such respect accorded to me here. Am I being punished? You are also aware that I don’t care for this kind of behavior from you. When you have forgotten about this little visit and have moved on. I will have not moved on. I do not move on. It is then that I will unleash my fury. Don’t let my fluffy exterior and pink nose fool you. I am a gray belt! Not quite as deadly as a black belt but far deadlier than a brown belt.

The birds here are also terribly uninspired. A very plebeian assortment of sparrows and other unworthy breeds. I have of course lodged a complaint with the person about this. The birds also do not come close enough to the windows. I want something done about that and I am afraid the person is not as interested in my desire for close up birding as they should be. Did you check the persons references? I feel you were misled.

The other cat is certainly NOKD. I mean, really. It insists on spending time with the person. I am truly ashamed to be called a cat. The creature had the nerve to come to the persons defense when I was calmly explaining how I would like my bedding prepared for the evening - I explained over and over that my rug was to be in the exact center of the bed and that I was the only one who would sleep on that bed. It is my way. The person sat on the bed and then turned down the bedding - which I at first thought was the first nice thing she had done for me, I thought she was adding to the padding under my rug. Instead she wanted to use my bed too! Again, I was outraged!

I told her what I expected and she ignored me! I was about to make my point more clearly for he when the other cat jumped in the middle of our conversation and interrupted us. It remained on my bed for the rest of the evening! I of course, claimed the larger part of the bed! This bed sharing is unnatural. I would hope that this situation will be remedied before this evening - but I sorely doubt it.

I also believe that there is a dog here. I have not seen it, as it is hiding, most likely to kill me! And yet, no one is alarmed! The other cat turns a deaf ear to my concerns about the dog. First it sides with the person and now it belittles my concerns about the dog. I am going to report the cat as soon as I get home. Which will be soon...?

Oh, by the way, if the person says anything to you about allege wounds I may or may not have “inflicted”, for the record she punctured her own hand with my teeth that she used with out my permission. I may have been drugged! off the record, between you and I, I am writing this is her blood.


Love,

Mini