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I decided to treat myself take myself out for lunch. I chose my favorite Chinese place because as long as I was out, I had a couple of errands were to places near my favorite Chinese place and I can pick up a few things at the neighboring Dollar Store.

So, I eat my food and finish my book and thank Gawd that the battling TVs are not turned up too loudly and that neither featured Shrub while I was there. TV #1 was tuned to CNN and they talked (over and over) about Christopher Reeves widow dieing while TV #2 was tuned to FAUX and they were beating the drum (over and over) about that wannabe jihadist who mowed into those kids at UNC. I finish my lunch and go to take care of my errands. Errand the first is to the Dollar Store.

I get into the Dollar Store and my mind goes completely blank. I can’t think of why I am there “Why am I here? Dog food? no, I don’t buy dog food at the Dollar Store. ”Do I want silk flowers?”, No. ”Do I want Easter Candy?” Yes, I do, but that is not why I am at the Dollar store. I try walking around hoping to jog my memory. I know I am here for a purpose and it is not cheap picture frames or pink and white camo pants. There was something I thought about before I went to lunch that made me say to myself that after I finished lunch that I should go to the Dollar Store and buy… But what was it? I was seeing a lot of stuff I could want but none of it was on my mental list. Perhaps I should I written this list on something less prone to going blank. I walked past a display of chair cushions. My Mom is looking for el cheap-o chair cushions. This is great but not why I thought I needed to go to the Dollar Store. I make a quick call to my Mom and tell her about the el cheap-o chair cushions (Gawd bless cell phones) and she is interested in the el cheap-o chair cushions and soon after I am carrying the chair cushions around the store looking for enlightenment and I still can not recall why I am there in the first place. It wasn’t because the el cheap-o chair cushions were calling to me.

The second or third time I walk past the Easter candy I remember. Dessert food! I need new dessert food for my lunch! Okay! Mission accomplished! What else was on that list?

I am not through. I come across what passes for the drug isle at the Dollar Store. I do not need toothpaste. I do not need plastic bowls. I could use some benadryl. Do they sell benadryl at the Dollar Store? Have I ever seen benadryl at a Dollar Store and if so did I see it this Dollar Store. All Dollar Stores are not created equally – some are very good and some are very awful. This is an awful Dollar Store.

I also think that maybe they took benadryle out of the Dollar Stores to make it harder for their patrons to go home and use it to cook meth with. This store is located in a student ghetto and I think most of the people who live around it lack the isolation that meth cooking requires. They may be consumers of meth, they may sell meth, but I don’t think they are involved with the production end - I should be able to find benadryl.

Yay. Benadryl. This is good. I have dessert food and benadryl. Was I looking for anything else? I can’t think of anything. I go and check out and as I am leaving I re-remember that I also need stamps. I go to the Post Office and pick up stamps. Boy, am I ever good! I say to myself .

I go back to the office and walk past a sign up sheet for a birthday breakfast to be held, oh, Wednesday. I am on the list, I signed up to bring paper plates, which is WHY I WENT TO THE DOLLAR STORE IN THE FIRST PLACE.