The Totem Pole or Self Pity 101



We got the new “O-Charts” emailed to us today; an “O-Chart” to the uninitiated is a guide to The Powers That Be, who does what and who reports to whom. Our little “O-Chart” goes on for pages and I am the very last name on the last page of the chart. Its one thing to joke about being at the bottom of the totem pole its quite another to actually be the bottom of the totem pole.

I wish I hadn’t opened the attachment. I really didn’t need to know that I am the lowest ranking person in the building, hell, in all our buildings across the state. Literally every single person I come in contact with is my superior, all these people, some of them really, really stupid. There are even a couple of them that I suspect are actually suffering from the early stages of dementia and all of them are my superiors. I come in contact with a lot of superior idiots.

The women would answer the phones except they are always chatting on there cell phones? Superior to me, The temp? Why yes, Superior to me, the data entry clerks? Superior to me, The woman who collects the bunnies? Superior to me.

It’s funny. When something goes wrong, I am made to feel like the most important person in the freaking world! My actions have consequence! The whole damn place spins on how well I do my job. Every damn thing that happens around here is my fault… Shit flows downhill and I am the lowest of the lowly at the very bottom of the hill.

I’ll be here five years in May.

See, I could go with the idea that if it wasn’t for the base the totem pole would fall over. “A strong base blah, blah the tallest tree blah, blah”. Whatever.

I am the one who fills the Public Records Act request. I do all the requests from our federal over seers as they take facilities to court to make them pay fines. I deal with all the subpoenas that come through. They aren’t addressed to me, that honor belongs to my boss. I’m too far down the totem pole to go to court. Yay. But they end up on my desk and they are ultimately my responsibility.I fill them, if there is something wrong it is my fault. But. I work like hell to make sure that things don’t go wrong and most of the time they don’t. Most of the time I make the office look good, the glow off that official goodwill doesn’t always make it down to the bottom of the totem pole but I hear towards the top it is a very becoming light – mostly in shades of yellow and blue. Our federal overseers think I’m great, the public for the most part likes me. I get gifts from third parties I can’t accept every Christmas.

Every single piece of paper that comes to, is produced by, requested from this office comes to my office. Every single document. I have it and there is a pretty good chance that I know where it is. Bottom of the totem pole.

But I can remember from bitter experence that it is better to at the bottom of the totem pole than not on the totem pole at all. I would much rather be annoyed and employed than annoyed and unemployed. I can sooth my self with my 11.10 hours of vacation time that after five years of employement I acrue each month.