Over the Radar

LANGSTRAND, Namibia (Reuters) -- Half of Namibians voting in an informal radio survey believe the day Angelina Jolie gives birth should be declared a national holiday, an honor usually reserved for kings, queens and national heroes.The couple has remained almost invisible in their beach resort in the tiny village of Langstrand on the country's desert coastline, shielded by tight security

Baby Pitt jumps the shark

The only Hollywood celebrities in their time zone. Way to fit in! The child is a fame whore and it isn’t even born yet, it is totally being passed down genetically from his fame whore mother. Brad Pitt has the eerie talent of being able to morph into whomever he is sleeping with, but he has never had the stink of fame whore, very poor self esteem, but you have to be right up on him to smell that. ”Lets see Jr., you have your fathers eyes, your mothers chin, your daddies ears, your daddy’s love of Tiffany lamps and your mommy’s fame whore nature!”. Let’s see, if you want to quietly await the birth of your child and you would like as much privacy as possible … what should you do?

I would suggest you mind your own business and go about your life as normal, or as normally as you can what with the waddling. Lately there have been damn near countless pregnant celebrities and most of them seem to prefer to enter a period of “confinement” of sorts before their babies are born. They don’t do anything special, they stay in their palaces and they have their “people” take care of their errands for them. They watch A Baby’s’ Story marathons on TLC and they stay in the house; at some point, in the fullness of time, they give birth either at home or at a hospital and then they hand the baby over to a nanny and start their post-pregnancy work outs. End of story. Six weeks later they officially unveil the baby and we all forget about the kid until it gets caught in an underage drinking sting.

But. That kind of behavior is not fame whore-y enough for Angelina Jolie. Angelina Jolie had to go to a far off distant land with very few other western celebrities around to take the heat off - to wait for the birth of her child. She couldn’t just stay in LA or wherever it is she lives, No, she had to go to Namibia. . There is nothing "invisable" or low key or under the radar about your presents if your presents is sparking talk of a NATIONAL HOLIDAY! If people are using your name and “national holiday” in the same breath? You are not adequately sequestered.

Speaking of Namibia, just when I thought that people in places that are not Here and people who are not Us, are some how better bred, more tasteful and more together than we are. The people of Namibia remind me that, no, jackass behavior cuts across cultural boundaries, all Gawds creatures have 1)too much time on their hands and, 2) access to People Magazine.

What else.

I tore up my office and went through just about every piece of paper I own and was pretty well convinced myself of my total incompetence and inefficiency and drove myself into a near stroke, I finally looked at what I was able to find. What I was looking for was not where it should have been because it was not there in the first place! Things have to arrive in my office before I can lose them. I spent a good forty-five minutes looking for something that is in no way here, when I could have spent the time looking for and finding the stuff that is actually in my office and is still in a pre-lost state, the other states being : kind of lost (mild-moderate panic)– i.e. wrong folder but same cabinet, more or less lost (moderate-severe panic) – i.e. filed in the wrong cabinet under different facility name, but same part of alphabet, difficult but not impossible to find, very lost (stroke-hand in resignation) i.e. filed in wrong place under wrong name then purged and sent to archives.

Why can’t I go to Namibia