And you lose some

The copy machine is down again, actually both copy machines are down, so I am now being thwarted in both analogue and digital formats. I believe that Guttenberg would be very disappointed in the work ethic of modern copy machines. I bet his machine whipped out three, four bibles before it got jammed and over heated and I bet he didn’t blame “humidity” or “cheap paper” for his machines faults. I would be willing to use one of his machines if it would mean getting this copying job done.

It was very disheartening that even the sad little machine I don’t like to use, wouldn’t work. It has only three moving parts and is powered by gerbils! It doesn’t work well or fast or in an efficant manor - but it works consistently. I expect the fancy machine to not work but the gerbil machine is supposed to work all the time. It’s old, it’s simple, and it’s slow! it’s a pain in the ass to operate and it’s supposed to work all the time.

My train of thought leaves the tracks

Oh, I found a new thing for you not to do. If you are hanging around the house looking for stuff to do - Don’t just for kicks, let heavy glass pot lids fall on your foot. True, it will give you the opportunity to curse out loud, but you can do that anytime you want, within reason. Really, if you are feeling peer pressure to suddenly scream obscenities out loud; don’t look to dropping glass lids on your feet as a means to and end. Just say no. it’s not worth the pain. Lets say, you did drop a glass lid on your foot, say, yesterday, don’t try to do it again - I know, you have heard anecdotal evidence that your body will rush defenses and pain killers to “new” pain and how this will temporarily disguise the “old” pain – you watch too much House. If you are suffering from some other pain that you are getting tired of, really, take a pill. Don’t experiment with TV show medicine. I felt fine as well as pain free before I crushed some poor innocent, anonymous bone in my foot. Now, I have a limp.

I also suggest for your acute pain management needs, that you always keep some sort of frozen something in your freezer. Go to the store and buy a bag of frozen pees, maybe two bags if they are on sale. I think that maybe buying frozen pees in a variety of sizes would be the best course of action – a smaller bag for hand or ankle injuries and a larger bag for knees or elbows. I do not suggest using frozen hotdogs to ice an injury! Blech, really, don’t go there I know that if you have in the past tried to wait for frozen hot dogs to thaw before cooking them, that it seems like it takes a very long time for them to defrost - in reality they unfreeze very quickly when in contact with body temperature and then you are stuck with luke cold floppy dogs. Yuck. Really, even if wrapped up, luke warm floppy dogs are gross.