Thursday, December 28, 2006

If I should sleep before I wake…


You know the best parts about having several days off in row? The whole bed time? I don’t need no stinkin’ bed time! I can stay up as late as I want! part, followed up quickly by the I can sleep until I wake up! I don’t need no stinkin’ alarm to get me up! part!

I did that the whole time off. If I didn’t get around to putting that DVD in until 10:30pm, then so be it! I could watch that movie until midnight and then go read my book until 1:30 and it was all right. I could do that. Stay up really late and then sleep in. Heaven.

Then out of nowhere it was Tuesday night and all of sudden I had to think about going back to work. Bummer. Work starts awfully early in the morning and I had changed my definition of “getting up early” from “sixish” to “eightish”. It really didn’t take long at all. I said to myself the evening of Christmas Day, “Hmmm. We’re going shopping; I should really set an alarm. I really should think about getting up early, I want to be serious about this; I think eight is early”. My people are not “door buster" people. We do not shop at six in the morning. We may not get the best of the picked over post-Christmas goodies but we do get to sleep past four in the morning. It’s a trade off we are willing to make. It’s simple really. On one hand you have the chance to bag 65 percent off pink, lime green and fuchsia hoodies in sizes 2, 4, 18, 20 and on the other hand you have sleeping past dawn and the same hoodies in sizes 2 and 18. Really, does anyone really need a size 4 fuchsia hoodie? What is the better value over all? Sleeping in or getting your hands on the last size 4 pink hoodie? If you have to ask, you should get whatever hoodie best matches the bags under your eyes. You deserve each other.

The day after Thanksgiving is an entirely different story. Did you know that the stores don’t re-order Christmas stuff? If you don’t grab that dancing Santa two weeks before Halloween, it is not going to be there the next time you are Don’t wait until actual December to get your Christmas decorations because by two or three days before Christmas, all that shite is in the 50 percent off bin and the rest of the store is all about Valentines Day.

Anyway.

Tuesday night I try to get back into my routine. I’m tired, I’m ready for bed, there is nothing I need to watch on TV, I’m going to … read the magazines I got in the mail. Fine. I can speed read. It’s not like Entertainment Weekly is really going to cause strain and then it was only like twenty after 10 and I really can’t go to sleep that early. So I read my Texas Monthly and its Bum Steer award time!. Okay, so its’ twenty after eleven. I turn off the light and go to sleep.

Or not.

I’m waiting.

And my leg hurts.

And sleeping in such away as to not pain my leg is pulling my hair.

Aaarrrgggh.

Did I mention that The Kitty is awake too?

Kitty is awake at 1:10am and 1:45 am and 2:20am and 4:00am

And that damn Kitty is smart too. I finally get up and go to put him in his crate. Kitty disappears down a rabbit hole and I can’t find him. He knows! He knows if I catch him he’s going into his crate! He has a brain the size of a walnut and he still manages to learn! he knows if I really want to find him I have to weight how much I want to make him stop verses how much I really, really want to be in bed. I have to decided how awake I want to be at a given time, is it worth it to find him or should I just go back to “sleep”. 3:15 am and he’s still awake. We have so much in common.

Santa brought me my airblown snowglobe!!!!!!

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