Tuesday, March 20, 2007


I am so over this winter. On Thursday I pulled out shorts to wear for walking the dog because it was so warm, by Saturday I was dressed in a ski suit wondering just how long it was going to take for my fingers and toes to stop hurting and get numb all ready.

When you’re warm you hardly even notice your feet are wet and when you do its’ like “oh. I hope the water doesn’t mess up my shoes”. Speaking of wet shoes and socks. I wanted to get nice heavy socks to wear. I couldn’t wear the shoes I wanted to wear as they have apparently been sucked up into some alternate reality and are no longer in this one. I looked and looked and those puppies are simply not in my house or my car, or on this planet any longer. I wore then last week and now they are just gone and I know I didn’t leave them at the dog park. It’s just weird. Any way. I needed socks to wear with the default shoes, I would have needed them with the right shoes too, but now I was annoyed about it. I needed big, thick, padded socks. My only concern was it might be hard to find them this time of year since I see heavy socks as a winter item. Little did I know.

Okay. I went to the store and found (finally) the sock isle. I started in the ladies sock section because, you know, I’m a girl. Well, after searching there I discovered that in Wal-Martland, girls and women don’t need nice, thick, heavy padded socks. Wal-Mart doesn’t think girls and women need to protect their feet from blisters or cold. Girls and women don’t wear heavy hiking boots or walking shoes. In Wal-Mart’s world view girls and women and their dainty little feet are carried everywhere they go and as such, have no need for protective foot wear. If the aliens who stole my shoes came to Wal-Mart they would think they were supposed to be worn with either stockings or cute anklets and they would get blisters and they would blow us up. I know I would.

I had to first go find then go digging around in the Men’s sock isle to find a pair of appropriate socks and according to Wal-Mart all men are stomping around on great big gun boats. It’s so totally phallic. In the men’s defense, in Wal-Marts world view all men spend their days charging around construction sites or working on a line somewhere. They had a lousy selection of men’s dress socks.

Have you ever gone on a bus trip? Did you notice how much longer the trip home is compared to the trip there? I mean, good Gawd, I thought I was going to die! I swear the bus made a swing though Louisiana on the way from DC to Raleigh. The trip to DC took four, five hours tops and that was with a couple of stops. The trip back was 15 hours or seven – it was really, really, really long. I knew we were in trouble when we blew right past the exit for “Raleigh – Downtown” sign. By the time we finally got home I was in my Imustleaverightnowgetmeoffthisthingnownownow place that I go to whenever I fly and the plane has landed and the door is open and I have to wait more than say, fifteen seconds to get off the plane. I’m standing there with my carry on and I am ready to go, go, go! and I seem to be the only one who wants to get off the plane. Everyone else stands around a blinks at each other instead of getting their stuff and deplaning. It makes me feel crazy on a plane; I was feeling down right insane waiting to get off the bus.

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