TV

Well, that was disappointing. I got comfortable in front of the TV and got all ready to camp out there and bask in my air-conditioning while I watched the last bit of this BBC mystery drama that I have been netflixing. I put CD number 5 into the machine and sat back to watch my little British people do a circa 1997 version of CSI London, but with cursing and male nakedness and exposed breasts,but without gore or blood or on screen violence - And the plonky title music started and the nighttime view of London started running and I fast forwarded because I’m over watching the credits and then the action started and...

Who are these people?!

The supporting cast was in place but the two leads AKA Why I watch, were nowhere to be seen. A bit of boozy exposition from the remaining cast revealed that “They had gone to California” and that the lead had been “head hunted to start up a path lab in LA”. What does he know from wounds from automatic weapons? He’s never even seen a gun shot victim. Poisonings? Sure! Previously unknown infectious disease? He owns disease-of-the-week! Garrotings? He’s all over it! Gah. The shows speciality is unmarked dead people, with the plot every week being how did this healthy appearing dead woman get that way.- It’s almost always a dead woman, thus the weekly exposed breasts.

I can’t even finish watching! When I put it on my list I saw a review that mentioned the “unlikable imitations of the characters”... I read that as the characters had changed between the fourth series and the fifth because at the end of the fourth the two leads hooked up and there are fans that hate to see TV characters happy. The character was miserable for four years, she should stay that way or if the character was a out-of-control philanderer, then he must keep right on philandering, damn it.

But I am an experienced TV watcher, shite like that rolls right off me. If the script says the miserable get to be happy and the man whore settles down? Then so be it, it’s called character development and it is a good thing. But I prefer that my well developed characters don’t get so over developed that they turn into totally different characters played by different actors.

I was going to end this with a screed about Hilary Clinton being a selfish cow and refusing to get off the cross or since I was talking about the performing arts, to use the vernacular, refusing to get the fuck off the stage... And then I checked my email

Sen. Hillary Clinton will officially end her campaign for the presidency by the end of the week, multiple sources tell CNN.

The hell? I was the last damn person in America to learn this! You would have thought that while I was wandering aimlessly around Poverty Barn, marveling at the $270 Brohill floor lamps (absolutely gorgeous lamps, if they had been more like $45 I would have taken one home, but they don't really want to sell me a lamp, they just have them there to make me feel bad that I can't even afford to buy a lamp at Poverty Barn. Misogynistic bastard's) that somebody would have said something, or that on the ride home that the radio might have mentioned it. I need to just set all the presets to NPR and leave the top 40 stuff behind. I’m too old for that shit anyway..But wait, I was listening to NPR and they weren’t talking about it, they were interviewing some guy about Bobby Kennedy choosing not to run against LBJ and how the guy they were interviewing wrote RFK a letter to bitch at him about it... So, Hmm. Maybe I can still listen to the latest in pop pap! Maybe radio in Raleigh in general just sucks for news delivery.

But you know what this means, I can go ahead and order my Obama 08 car magnet! I can finally retire my Kerry magnet and move on. I’ve been in mourning for four long years, maybe this way I can start the healing process... Yes, I do chose to see getting a new car magnet for my car as a balm for my pathologically hurt feelings. On election night 2004, I spent the night sobbing in my dogs crate, cut me some slack. If I burst into tears this election night, I pray to God that they are tears of joy.

Oh, and I don’t want Hilary for VP.