Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Oh, look its Wednesday

I went and visited my plants and the damage is still there. I would think that once I called them out that "they" would  be forced to own their mistake, make amends and maybe  give me some candy or something, BASTARDS! They are feasting on my plants and I can't stop them! I poison and I give them almost no privacy and yet they continue to turn my plants into shred's! Today? much to my heart break,  I found a gnawed on tomato plant! Someone is going to have to die now and it is not going to be my plant.

The Powers That Be do not want me to be able to poison successfully, they send rain seconds after I get my spray on. I then started to think about more organic or at least less petrochemical means - I mean besides my existing egg shells and marigold method. I did some research on soap poison. Yeah. About that. You can't just spray and go, the only way to make the soap method work is to spray each bug as you see it. You have to be available all the time to use the soap method and if you are going to be out there standing guard with your spray bottle you might as well just stand there and pick the little monsters off one by one.

I'm thinking about re-introducing the lady bugs. Fight bugs with bugs. Let them bond with the the bugs so that I don't have to. The first time there wasn't anything around for them to eat and that might have been a contributing factor to them leaving me - those that didn't die of boredom, the really ambitious bugs left for a better party. But now? Now there is a buffet! also, next time I'll have better beer. Or beer at all, cutting down on my slug population, those few truly psychotic, dedicated self harming ones that are not turned back by my eggshells. BASTARDS.

Speaking of the great outdoors, Broskey  fixed my bike. It now rolls like I do, in my car. I was going to ride it at lunch on Tuesday but it rained. Surprise! I was going to, I thought it was going to stop, it looked for a few minutes like it was a much lighter shade of  gray - Yes, I am given to magical thinking, sue me - I could have been one of those crazy people out there - I wanted to be out there, just not in the rain. The crazy people are out there riding their bikes in a deluge but I'm not that crazy. I see those people and I'm always thinking Oh. You know there are medications that will chemically enhanced that desire right out of you.. Those people are like turkeys that drown in the rain because they are too stupid to get out of the rain and you know they aren't thinking Oh, how much like a turkey I am! They're thinking I am so hard core! My dedication to awesome. It's pouring rain and I am out in it!.

But, they are sleek in their sopping wet bike togs and I am pudgy in my dry car.Who looks like a turkey now?

1 comment:

Cat said...

I do wonder about those hard-cores who bike or run in any weather. I see them coming down Trenton Rd all the time. You can be sure that if I'm out in a thunderstorm, I'm racing for shelter as fast as I can.