Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Dog

I came home for lunch on Monday curious to see how Rocket was faring on his first real day home from vacation. I couldn't get the door open because he had knocked a large bag of rocks off the counter and a bunch of coupons I had clipped and forgotten about and he hate my favorite umbrella! So I cleaned that up while he danced around and begged me to pay attention to him while I counted to ten over and over and tried to reschedule my lunch plans around this fresh hell.

He didn't know it but his punishment for this was no lunch walk for him! And I gave him the silent treatment, because dogs totally "get" passive aggression behavior.

I came home to try out my new Lunch Plan. I tried to think what my favorite lunch and I decided to DIY the little bastard. I thought about what lunch I liked the best when it was available and I decided that a tuna sandwich on a croissant was my favorite lunch, I added some baked lays and a small bottle of Dr. Pepper and I would be set. Sunday night I thought I could save some time by making up the tuna the night before... I don't have a can opener anymore. It went on vacation and didn't come back and so I got to leave the house at 9pm on a Sunday night to go to Food Lion and buy a new one.

And so I cleaned up the kitchen and ate my lunch and went back to work. I got a phone call once back at work that informed me that I had won a silent auction I had signed up for over the weekend and they needed me to come in and claim my prize.  I was very excited, I never win anything. My Monday was suddenly looking up!

I go home, the house in clear mostly because there is nothing for the dog to destroy - Note to self, evacuate computer  and camera to safer location...

Anyway, I have to go right back out to claim my winnings. I decide that I will experiment with another way to contain the dog.  I put him in the office with a bowl of water and all his toys and the door closed.

The door is still hanging on its hinges when I return but it looks like its been attacked with a machete. Then my Dad calls and tells me what really happened while the dog was there without me - he destroyed everything he was left alone with and made them miserable! I  am now wondering if they make military  boarding schools for incorrigible bad dogs and wondering what kind of a warranty I got with him.

And then we went on a walk and he was a prince to everyone we met, calm, friendly, collected, polite, obedient and well behaved. A completely different dog. I got  compliments on this dog! What a well behaved dog he is! So well trained! So patient and calm! The persons dog would never be this good! What a beautiful animal! I was so proud of this dog! Why can't that dog live with me! Why! Why! Why! Why is he so nice to everyone else while still making me cry and wonder about how I messed him up so badly?  How did I break the puppy? Why is he so good when I'm here and such a nightmare when I'm not?! He is getting fixed on Thursday, hopefully this will change things.

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