Monday, August 11, 2014

Swimming with the fishes

It rained Saturday. All Day Saturday. The dog got zero walks and I got next to nothing done. I did however, go research fresh water aquarium fish with Broskey and Alphagal.

My research concluded that salt water aquarium fish are sexy. Very sexy, sexy fish. Almost obscenely beautiful with bright colors and beautiful patterns. They stand out, they are eminently fuckable. These fish know how to party, they know they are desirable and wanted and they know you think they are desirable and  and that you want them. Salt water aquarium fish are very high maintenance creatures,  very high self esteem creatures, like all highly desirable, wanted creatures, are - probably real douche bags as well.

The fresh water aquarium fish are pious, modest, clearly reverent creatures.You really needed a sign to tell you that the tank actually did have something in it. Generally these fish appear to have poor self esteem and low self worth, I think they must cry a lot. When they weren't emo poetry, these fish would totally pick you up at the last moment from the airport in the middle of the night. Fresh water aquairum fish are very nice fish, friendly fish but you do not want to fuck these fish.  They spend a lot of time hiding behind rocks or pretending to be rocks, and generally being as unobtrusive as possible. They probably apologize a lot. The smartest and probably least pious fishes school together to give you the impression that they were not a mass of reverent, modest fish but actually a larger, possibly attractive fish that you may actually want to spend time with.

This is why I don't have an aquarium.

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