Res Ipsa Lawyer


No - as defined by the Oxford American Dictionary as, not any, not a, quite other then, not at all, as a denial or refusal of something

I - as defined by me, me. This person. The keeper of the files.

Will Not - ibid, Not going to, cannot, negitive response to suggestion or request.

Give - As defined by OAD as, To cause another person to receive or have especially something in ones disposal, to supply.

Lawyer Boy as defined by me as, Ambulance chaser, Blood Hound, one who thinks he can scare me into giving (see above) him what he can not have by threatening me with a Subpoena.

Subpoena - OAD - 1) A writ demanding a person appear in a court of law. Me - a way to make me hand over what he should not have.


So Lawyer boy smarts off and says, “Well, we’ve done this before, had to jump through hoops to get the information” and I say “Yeah. They’re called a subpoena. Get One Asshat.

I told him what the what was, that the stuff he wants is confidential, protected by law, not in the public domain… and I sent him off to talk to some one who gets paid more, who then told him that the stuff is confidential, protected by law, not in the public domain.

I went to tell the Mouth That Roars, who was on an interminable personal call, that a subpoena was on the way. She said to make sure they spell her name right.

Lawyers.

So I’m going to drop what I’m doing, copy the file, twice, redact one and put the other aside. I will mail the file to LB and wait for the Marshal or whatever to hand over the paper. The Mouth That Roars will roar. The subpoena will be checked to make sure it isn’t some lame Lawyer signed subpoena as opposed to a Real Subpoena signed by a judge (it’s the difference between a steer and a bull.) Higher ups will be notified, our lawyer will be notified, and lawyers will talk to lawyers.

A court date will be announced. The Mouth that roars and the Woman in Charge will go to court. I will never know whether the judge made us turn over the unredacted documents or not.

Time will be wasted and much of it will be mine.

Happy Talk

I have four new garlic sprouts. I had forgotten about those plantings. I thought all that was in that pot was a lone carrot. The potato plants are doing well. There is a lovely mystery seedling in there as well.

There has been so much rain that my potter plants have suffered erosion. I had to add more dirt to them.

The salvia plants are thriving, the marigolds are doing better but I still lost one last week to slugs. With the slug bait all around. Bastard slugs.

Dog is doing very well. Today she achieved Stay and Come, although she did tend to charge when she thought she saw me reach for the reward cookie. I don’t know whether she was responding to the “Come on girl!” or the vision of me going for the cookie pocket.

I mowed the lawn today. It was looking kind of ragged and it’s going to rain off and on for the rest of the week. Again. I wanted to get it done while I had some chance of it not raining on me mid mow. The down side is that I am now out of lawn mowing sync with my neighbors.