Par-tay! It’s The Weekend! Woooo!


I did a couple of the projects on my if there is nothing else to do, To Do List that I had been meaning to do but hadn’t really found the time for. There is always something I would rather do then vacuum out and change the paper in the cupboard where the cats box lives or track down what is causing the kitchen to smell. I was betting it was something in the trash or the garbage disposal, I have rotten aim and I figured that something that was supposed to end up in the garbage (several weeks ago) might have ended up near but not actually in the can or that something might have immigrated down to the disposal and died.

Yeah. No winner there, the mystery stank was actually Mr. Kitty’s cupboard on the other side of the house. I had really been hoping that a good grind up with the disposal would make the place smell less like a scratch and sniff episode of Cops.

I knew I had to do something when I walked in the door and had to ask myself “What Died?” and then “How many cat’s do I have”. It was strap on a respirator and rubber gloves or vacuum the living room or put the two weeks worth of laundry away. I also decided it would be more fun to clean out the entry way at the bottom of the basement steps and suction out the drain there. And when that wasn’t enough of a thrill for me, I gave the dog a bath and laundered her towels. Woo – Hoo. Then I vacuumed the front yard, the grass isn’t growing anymore and raking the yard and bagging up the leaves is just blister causeing , and I just don’t want to do it. I did it, after the storm and then I was, “how can I not do this again?”.

If I did go to the trouble of bagging all those leaves I light miss an I Love The 80s marathon on VH1 that I have only seen three times or an episode of Designing for The Sexes that I haven’t all ready snarked on or an in-depth article on Sarah Jessica Parkers favorite brand of nail polish in Us that I need to read. It’s all about setting your priorities.

Being a grown up looked so much more dynamic and exciting when I was a child. I don’t remember my Mom doing any of these chores. She went to the super market all the time! And every single time an into some one she knew and who she had to talk to Right Now! For about three days. This was very exciting. She went to the dry cleaners! And the drug store and The Place to get that thing! All these exciting errands. Fun, Fun, Fun! Go in the car, drive someplace! Go somewhere! Weeeee! I wasn’t a child I was a golden retriever.

One time when we were kids, she had a friend or somebody over to the house and they were having a very serious conversation at the kitchen table about Whither Our Public Schools or whatever and my friends and I thought we were going to starve to death since it had been a whole hour since we had been fed lunch and we were going to die if we didn’t have whatever was in the kitchen (not a damn thing, My mother didn’t buy snack food or sodas or sugar cereals or anything else we wanted to eat. The only things we were going to find to eat in there would be Grape Nuts™ or carrot sticks. Neither of which lent themselves to covert ops). We decided that we could sneak into the kitchen and take food out of the refrigerator while the grown ups were talking and they would never notice and we wouldn’t get into trouble for bugging them. We totally did not understand that a child crawling across the kitchen floor dragging belts and kite string behind it was not going to pass undetected.

We thought we were being very Harriet The Spy.

I don’t remember what the outcome of the mission was. It probably ended up with no snack, carpet burn and being locked outside. Mom was tough.