Rainy days and Mondays

It’s Monday again. So soon? I think I got gypped out of at least one day this weekend. Lets see, Saturday? Put more lights up outside, raked the yard, helped Brosky and Alphagal tidy for their party, went to party, Sunday. Slept really late, wrapped gifts or rather, put gifts into gift bags, for the people at work, made out cards, took Dogger for a long walk in the Historical District, where whom ever had the fresh cut garland and wreath and tree route in there made a killing. It looked like Sherwood Forest blew up and settled tastefully to ground there. No colored lights, nativity scenes or blow up Santa’s to be found. Sad, went to Sams, left keys at cash register didn’t realize until all ready found spare set while getting rained on, recovered original set of keys went home, decided after careful consideration, and testing of theory, that Baklava should be considered a main course Yup, looks like the weekend. I think I need another day off.

It was pretty though in the District, in the day light. It looked like they had a very strongly worded suggestion from the home owners association as to what made for appropriate Yule tide decoration in the Historical District. It was so tasteful there was only one plastic flamingo with a wreath around its neck and no blinker lights to be found. I did see a couple of gold spray painted pumpkins left over from Halloween, which at least in my mind is some what questionable taste wise, but they appeared to have been spray painted with very expensive spray paint – very Martha Stewart.

Every house had a real tree inside. You could tell. They were all too full and bushy to be plastic. I guess that’s nice. I had one last year and it was like having a sick house guest for the holidays or another pet. I was glad it was there and everything, but the work it required was kind of a kill joy. I was also afraid it was going to die or set my house on fire. Not a good house guest at all.

My plastic tree has reached an age where it sheds almost as much as a real tree. It doesn’t smell as nice but neither did the real tree after a week or so and the plastic tree doesn’t poke me in the eye or bite me every time I get close to it. Score plastic tree!

The Home Owners Association in the Historical District came by to take pictures of my place as a What Not To Do, they are uncomfortable knowing that something as garish as my place is in the same zip code as their tasteful sprays of evergreen branches and white lights. Tough. My house looks like a cross between a festive Titty bar and a bait and tackle shop the weekend of a big mouth bass fish off. I like it.

On the radio I heard an add for Toys For Ta-Ta’s. If you take a new toy to the advertised Titty Bar you can get the opportunity to hang around with stripper-elves. Wow. Let them see a toy and you get to see Ta –Ta’s. It mention unwrapped toys, does that mean they will supply unwrapped Ta-Ta’s? it seems only fair. Unwrapped toys for unwrapped Ta-Ta’s or since it is a stripper bar maybe they unwrap their own ta-ta’s?

Giggle, I just like typing Ta-Ta’s.