Wake Up And Smell The Consternation

I hit the trifecta at 5:27am Sunday morning. The kitty was tap dancing through the breakables, I had to go to the bathroom and somehow over night I had swallowed some razor blades and they were hurting like hell on the way down.

So.

I got up, visited the facilities, and went downstairs to feed the cat. While I was downstairs I noticed that there was a light on in the back yard. Sometimes the electric eye back there is so into its job that it forgets to blink. I went to the basement door and turned off the eye. Okay. Must Go Back to Bed Now. Curses. When I go back into the kitchen I see a light is still on. It must be the light over the downstairs door. Now I have to turn on yet another light, go down the very step basement steps, walk across the basement and turn off the light. Go back upstairs, turn off the lights I have turned on and then, Go Back To Bed. All the while hoping that all of this is getting Doggers attention and reminding her that she too may need to be fed and toileted right now. This is a lot of activity for some one trying not to wake themselves up too much and planning to Go Back To Bed.

I finally get back to bed. Kitty is all ready back to sleep at the foot of the bed,. I lay there. I lay there and my throat hurts. I lay there and try to remember if I still have throat spray. Then I lay there and try to remember if I put it back in the bathroom cabinet where it belongs the last time or if it is in the bedside table downstairs leaking on something. I finally sleep, only to be woken up again because Kitty sensed where I hurt and was trying to make it better by putting his considerable weight to work crushing the bad, nasty hurtful throat that was making his Mommy unhappy. He was also purring like an out board motor into my ear. I turned over and went back to sleep and dreamt of all the important scraps of paper that will never suffer from sore throats again.

My alarm goes off. Last night I set the alarm and had planned to hop out of bed, get dressed, feed the dog and load both Dogger and Kitty into the truck and go to Petsmart for cheapo rabies vaccinations. Before 10am and get back in time for noon Mass.

Instead of hopping out of bed I lay there doing my best impersonation of a blanket. I was not in a hopping place. I was in a collapsing place.

But. Cheap vaccinations don’t grow on trees. Vets do not often wave the charge for office visits. This was a saving of $70 for the two animals and I was not going to let a little thing like being on my death bed to keep me from it.

Okay. Up dressed, took Dogger out. Picked up the paper, fed Dogger, put Dogger in the yard, read some paper, rounded up Kitty, put Kitty head first and snarling into his box, found Doggers leash, put both animals into the truck and off the Petsmart.

Got to the Petsmart 15 minutes early and took a nap.

I was woken up by some asshat’s yappy dog who thought he was going to get in line for the vacs a head of me. Amateur. I haven’t been awake since 5:27 am to be the second in line.

I think I may have found a new, cheaper vet for the animals. Yay! No more vet induced guilt! No more unnecessary tests! No more paying $170 to announce that Dogger may have fleas! $33 for two animals!! Office visits are only $27!!! They have Sunday hours!!! Woo-Hoo!!!! Other Vet was nice, but Other Vet charged too much.