Insert something clever here

I spent another day alternating between crawling around on my knees and hefting heavy file boxes. I still haven’t found what I’m looking for and I don’t think Bono couldn’t find the damn thing either. He wouldn’t know from not being able to find what he’s looking for until he’s looked through thousands of pages of paper trying to find it. I don’t even care anymore. I was looking through the folders and I couldn’t remember what I was looking for. I’m not going to find it because its not there. I know its not there, the temp knows its not there, the woman I eat lunch with knows its not there. But its not there until the big boss says its not there.

So, still I look and look and look. Some days I wonder where filing was on my degree path. My diploma turns itself to the wall and weeps.


But. I have my computer back! I’m not the object of mockery any longer. Yes I was mocked. Every time I watched an ad on TV and they said call 1-800-CRAPPYJUNQ or go to our web site www.crappyjunq.com. Mocking, mocking everywhere! Want some free stuff? Go to our site, want more information? Go to our site!, want to buy our crappy junq? Go to our site! Suddenly all these cool web sites were popping up all over the place and there was nothing I could do about it. I was flipped through my 80 something channels, everyone of the advertising something with a web site. I’ve been feeling so left out. Web sites were everywhere! I walked Dogger and the light poles were covered in hand bills advertising bands and they all said “Check out our rawking site to learn more! Go to www.screamingbeersoakedgroupies.com !” the poles that didn’t have bands on them had lost kitty signs and even they referenced web sites. I went to the store to buy Kitty more dust and the dust had it’s own web site!

My college also joined in the mocking. I got a newsletter, which is odd because I didn’t give them any money and I told them they didn’t have a giving level that sufficiently met my ardor for the school. I would think that the newsletter would go to paid up alumna before it went to me. But anyway. They changed the name of the school and now they will send us new diplomas with the new name on them if we go to their web site and if we don’t mind waiting six to eight months to get our new diploma. I would like one if only so I can have another thing with my name on it that isn’t a utility bill but I would have to go to www.newdamnname.com to get on the list. Mocking name changing losers.

Everything has a web site now. Even those crappy craftmatic adjustable beds™ has a web site. They sell hospital beds to old people and they have a site. It would be a hard life if you wanted to be a Luddite full time.

Oh. I need to send out congrats to one of my girl cousins who just had a baby boy. Go Her! And I also need to send out condolences to Cuz SSG (Ret.) who fell down and bunged up his ankle in a less then cool way. He is so going to have to lie about it when people ask. “Oh, why, yes. I was injured while I was chasing rebels across the desert and I tripped over Hussians spider hole”. Much cooler then having to admit he hurt himself playing volleyball. He’s way kewl though, so he may be able to get away with the volleyball angle. He was playing in Kuwait.

Did I mention that Lost in Translation is available on DVD and video? And that you should rush out tonight and rent it?