Ask The Answer Dogs, Vol. 3


Hi Answer dogs. I'm a big fan.

My question has to do with my human trying to embarrass me. He makes me wear sweaters and costumes, and I think the other dogs at the Dog Park are laughing at me. When I've cornered one or two about it, they say it's because I'm all "fancy" looking with my dog sweater, but I can't do anything about it-- no thumbs and all that. Since Dogger wears sweaters (not sure about Bandit and Winston), I thought you might have some insight into this. How do I keep my dignity in costume?

Signed, Wolf in Bo Peep Clothing


Dear Wolf,

The Answer Dogs feel your pain. The Counter Point Kitty says "Nnah,nnah, but that is besides the point.

Dogger says "Hi, Wolfy. When I first got my sweater I really didn't like it. It was binding and the zipper thing got caught in my fur and I really had concerns about what would happen if I got it wet, but it was fine. It took just a few times outside being really, really cold and I saw the wisdom if the sweater. My person goes out in the cold and she doesn't look like my person at all! She wears all these layers it really wasn't fair to me. I was out there in the cold and wet, naked while she was covered head to toe! Speaking of toes, mine are shoe free! The not dog told me once while he was slapping me around, that there had been some mention of shoes for me. I thought that the not dog was using this to further torture me, 'cause he does that. I didn't know they made dog shoes! The not dog said they do make them and I was in line to get some. My feet? in shoes? how would I walk? how would I not fall down? are people insane! the not dog insists its true. I hate the not dog.

I say, wearing sweater makes you warm and if you do have a sweater with Peep -y bits, chew them off and as to your dignity, Bark! Be A Dog! Growl at something! Its not about what you're wearing its about what you are!

Bandit had this to say:

Dude.Woofman, Dog Coats Suck. I would rather be cold and wet them luke warm and in a coat. They make us look like dolls or small humans. That's wrong. We're Dogs for Dogs sake! We are made for being in the wild! We have thick coats all ready and we are born to run! I hate my coat. I am all about the running and the playing and the rolling and I don't feel comfortable running, playing or rolling in my coat. I need to feel comfortable. I need to roll! If it gets really, really cold, go out do your thing and go back inside. You don't have to spend a lot of time being out there and if you do? Chase something, make them pay for being in your yard and taking for granted you wouldn't be there! If you bark enough your people will let you in. They know its cold and they aren't out there with you because they can't hack it. Don't let them just put you out there! I say, chew up the outerwear. Be a real dog!

Winston says:

Bandit can be all "Real Dog" he has longer fur. I have no fur and the cold sucks. I have a sweater and I wear it. It doesn't say anything about your Doggness, it says "I'm not freezing to death in the snow". I agree with Dogger, if there are offensive bits on your sweater, chew them off! Make the sweater your own! Be Proud, Be Warm! If the other dogs at the park give you crap about your sweater, wrestle them to the ground and give them a chance rethink what they said about your sweater. Dogger was right, it's not about what you are wearing its about who you can wrestle to the ground. Woof!