Insert Winter here

Hello Children! How are you today? Having a fun day at work? Any traumas so far? Good. I hate early morning traumas. It just sets a bad tone for the day. I get all traumatized and then I can’t work effectively for the rest of the day. I like to schedule my traumas for the end of business if possible.

It’s supposed to get ugly again here this week. More ice and snow on the way. We just got over the last little bit of snow and here it comes again. If we’re lucky it won’t start until after rush hour, but it’s never to soon for the little rednecks to get all het up about a little impending doom.

I think I’ll celebrate this impending doom by going out again and stocking up on toilette paper, bread and milk. I don’t need any of that stuff but I’m trying to be more at one with the people. I also want ice cream and if I’m going to be bad and buy it, I might as well buy things that might be more practical. I think what I should do is hit the video store and stock up for the weekend. Last weekend was cold and wet and miserable and it looks like the coming weekend isn’t going to be much better. If I was really going to be hardcore about it I would move the DVD player upstairs and watch with the dog, but, that involves a lot of coax and cables and plugging and unplugging and moving dog toys to and fro and I can’t see me getting all excited about that. It does make me wish I had a TV upstairs back when I was getting on with my Dishthing, because I don’t think it was a lot more to get another room added. If I had, I would never have to go downstairs for anything all winter – but this way, should the Dishthing fail, I still have TV and I really need TV.

The last time I bought up for impending doom I picked up a six pack of Shiner. I didn’t plan on it but my grocery store doesn’t carry it and I thought “why not!”, so I did and now, I’ve drank three of them since the coronation. I hadn’t had three beers in the last three years and now Shrub has poured beer down my throat three times in a week. Bastard. Beer is really carbtastic; I can blame my weight gain and incipient alcoholism on Shrub. I hate Shrub.

Speaking of Shrub hate. I got panhandled twice in my neighborhood this week. Twice! In my neighborhood! One right out in front of my house. They didn’t used to come this far in, they stayed a couple of blocks up from me on a different street. It is not a good thing. The first was a woman and she told me right off she wasn’t a whore. How nice of her to clear that up, I was pretty sure she was a junkie whore and then she cleared it up for me, a junkie, yes, a whore, no. I left her standing outside in the street talking to herself and she was still talking when I came back with my trash, I’m not sure she noticed I wasn’t there or if maybe my recycling was more chatty then her than it is with me I wonder if I should feel hurt? I gave her fifty cents because I knew I had it somewhere and she was cold and wet outside while I was warm and dry inside. I don’t think you can buy a useful amount of drugs for fifty cents so I don’t think I was contributing much to her eventual downfall the whole Hand Up not Hand Out thing notwithstanding. If it had been summer time and she had asked for a dollar, she would have been on her own.