Pow! Right to the kisser!

Do you have a punching bag? Don’t ya want one? I mean, not all the time. I would bet they’re real dust catchers. I think that a punching bag rental company would do really well and be able to do so with out having to charge a lot for the service, it’s not like the renters would need to keep the punching bag for an extended time. I would think that a few hours, a couple at most would be necessary and then on to the next client. I don’t even think that everyone would need a heavy bag wither. Most people would do very well with one of the little bags, they make a very satisfying sound when they are pounded and they don’t fight back. The heavy bags would offer a little too much weight on their side, they could knock a smaller person over and that wouldn’t be at all satisfying.

But.

When you need a punching bag isn’t it a pretty intense need? Not in the “I need a soda” way but in the “I need to hit someone” way . If you’ve gotten to the point that you need to punch somebody, you really, really need to. Aggression is a very bad thing to keep locked up. It makes you snarky and rude it leads to passive Aggression and flame wars. It can make you really, really angry at posters on web sites that say nasty things about an episode of a TV show that you really liked. When posters bitching about a single episode are making you angry, it’s really time to punch something that can’t punch back. I know its time when I want to post these to a TV forum I lurk at:

1) “I don’t think it had anything to do with Columbus or people from Columbus, or people from the Midwest in general! I think it had everything to do with his Dad being an asshole to his son and making him uncomfortable. His dad the one guy, not the entire region, not white males in general, not WASPs. He would be an asshole if he was from Miami Beach or Las Vegas or Brooklyn. You can totally be an asshole in the 213 area code”. Jerkwad.

2) "When do we care about redstate losers anyway? We hate them for being bourgeois and having no taste! and not being "smart enough" to watch this show in the first place! Every week we bitch about “those people” and now all of a sudden we’re all pissed off and protective of "those people" and their little mid-western feelings because they may or may not have been insulted?" STFU.

3) “Yes, you didn’t laugh at the episode, it’s a DRAMA you FREAK! Last week you did laugh and you bitched that the humor was inappropriate in what is meant to be a heavy drama! I hate you”.

See? I could really use one. I think it would help my blood pressure to no end if I could take out some of my superfluous hostility. I’m getting really hostile. On a bad day all it takes it one stupid comment and it’s enough to make me want to punch innocent walls or really deserving people. That is why I need a punching bag.

And not one of those el cheaper blow up ones either. When I need to hit something, I need to hit something you know? Or I am forced to take my pique out on a handful of cookies or a milkshake. I also think it’s bad for my karma and my waistline to get really angry with people just because I choose to hear what they are saying as aggressively stupid and unthinking and borderline insulting when it fact what they are saying may only be the speaker showing a mild case of poor judgment or trying to be funny or maybe they just don’t know how seriously I take the subject in question and how I really have no sense of humor regarding it at all. That is not their fault and how are they supposed to know anyway? It is not fair for me to think unkind thoughts about them, and no one deserves to have a little throw away comment, no matter how stupid or unkind or insulting or passive aggressive it sounded to me - used as an excuse for me to think really nasty thoughts about them. It’s not nice.