Wednesday, March 14, 2007

The Office

Now this, this is what I am talking about.

The first really warm, extended daylight day of the spring. All of my dog park buddies sitting around the park bench, all of Doggers dog friends going from person to person getting pats and Dogger was having a great titme. Ahhhhh. I also got to do some research on a dog breed I had some interest in. Fox Hounds, a bit like a large beagle, I thought they would be a neat dog to have. No. They casually back the worse dog noise ever. You know that sound your dog makes when you accidently step on its foot? Or what it sounds like when a dog is being eaten slowly by a land squid? Those dogs make that noise when they are running after a stick and they don’t get it or when they think they aren’t going to get it or some dog somewhere in the world might at that moment be getting a stick.

Everyone was really genuinely concerned about Dogger and her poor little shaved self. It was really nice. I would have just stayed there, but it was getting late if not dark and it was time to go. By Friday, it’s going to be 52 and raining. In DC the high on Saturday is supposed top out at 42.

I enjoyed the warm and sunny while I could.

I had to laugh at work today. I think late last week I heard someone in the break room talking about this green meat in the refrigerator and that it had been there for a while. The solution to the green meat problem was, I understood from what I was over hearing, was to move the green meat to the front of the refrigerator so that it’s owner might notice it was green and deal with it. It was of course unthinkable that anyone else might take the initiative to get rid of the green meat themselves.

This afternoon, some one came into the office from the breakroom and said “Why is there meat taped up in the refrigerator?” and I said Wuh? and the girl said again “Why is there meat taped up in the refrigerator?”. I started laughing, and I mean, hard, because I was thinking of a slab of meat taped up somewhere. And I’m thinking, she must be kidding. And while I am laughing I’m imagining tape and meat and the refrigerator. And so I go look and I laugh some more. There is a baggy with a pork chop, a pork chop with a greenish cast to it and this baggy of greenish pork chop is taped up, inside the refrigerator, on the edge of the shelf, like an ugly tie.


AS it turned out, the meat and its baggy wasn’t just moved to the front of the shelf, it had been taped to the front of shelf and left there as some sort of object lesson to the other meat. You know, stay here long enough, become green and you too will be taped up like a Dilbert cartoon.

Now. Packing tape is not common around the office, not yet. So the taper had to leave the break room, go to the other side of the building search around and then, find some tape and then go back to the other side of the building with the tape to the break room to tape up the baggy then go back to the other side of the building to put the tape back where they found it.

Now. If the mad taper was so put out by the green meat, why didn’t they just throw it away? I did, I took the meat and marched it outside to the dumpster and threw it away. Done, finished. Took me all of three minutes. I didn’t tape it to the front of the dumpster, so that everyone could shre my outrage, I didn’t wait for someone else to take the initiative to finished the job... I can see the taper spending the last week or so watching the meat turn green and getting pissed about it. Fine. And I’m sure the taper bitched about the green meat far and wide and went on and on about how gross her co-workers are and how inconsiderate they are letting their meat get green and not throwing it away.

The green meats' owner was kind of lazy about disposing of their meat before it turned green, but at least they didn’t TAPE IT TO THE REFRIGERATOR instead of THOWING IT AWAY Gawd.

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