Clean

The dogs at the park are still holding on the hope that another squirrel nest will miraculously fall out of a tree and onto their heads again. It is very hard to explain the laws of probability to a dog, even harder to a group of dogs where group think says that if you wait for it, it will fall out of the sky and into your laps , if you just wait long enough. They just hype each other up. I think if they let dogs buy lottery tickets they would. I mean, the whole if-dogs-could-talk, if-dogs-had-money, if-dogs-could-go-into-stores... and that’s only really the dogs that could see over the counter. The smaller dogs would have to train themselves to be circus quality performers in order to see over the counter, and then they would have to really decide if being a side show act was worth it just to play the lottery. There are a lot of if’s. It does however go with out saying that they could play those scratch off games like champs though.

The park is full of labs that have suddenly become born again bird dogs. Dogs that previously were too busy humping each other to chase tennis balls suddenly are parking themselves under trees or wandering around looking alert as though they were auditioning for a sporting goods catalogue. Step on a twig around there now and half a dozen dogs will go into flawless points The very dogs last that July wet themselves out of fear when they heard fire crackers a block away are suddenly talking about hunting season and communist inspired limits on birds.

They are going to be sorely disappointed to learn that hunting season corresponds with football season and the start of the holiday shopping season and the only reason their people are going to get up early Saturday morning is to go tailgating or shopping and that there is a better than average chance that the family dog is not going to be spending time at Nordstoms.

Dogger is even getting into the spirit and she doesn’t even know what a squirrel is. The only little furry things that frequent our yard are rats, but that doesn’t stop her from getting really excited when the real bird dogs sound the alarm that there might be a squirrel or a dead leaf or a pine cone or a really small dog, somewhere and that all must be alerted now.

Out of desperation today, a group of dogs bravely set upon a pine cone, which they discovered too late was neither nummy or tasty or squirrely. Fortunately, being dogs, some one through a tennis ball and they forgot all about the treacherous pine cone.

Someone brought new tennis balls to the park! We never have new tennis balls! We have old, damaged, dead tennis balls that the dog was playing with in the car and forgot to leave behind when they arrive at the park.. I saw a yellow ball and was shocked! Folks will bring up new chairs now and then, but no one ever brings up new tennis balls. Do you know how nice it is to pick up a tennis ball and not be faintly nauseated? I mean you look at some fo them and it’s real struggle to decided if it’s more important to be a good dog person and play fetch with your dog or if you should try to maintain some sort of infection control protocol. Universal precautions are not fun and the other dog people really don’t understand why you are washing your hands in the water bowls and why you keep power washing the picnic tables or organizing weekly dog toy disinfection parties. If you have some sort of open wound on your hands, and what dog owner doesn’t from time to time... if you were given to worrying , it would be a good thing to worry about.

Of course, I don’t, I have a nine year old cat. I am a walking petri dish and Dogger isn’t much for fetch anyway. I have a friend at work however who is a germaphobe bordering on the pathological and she’s getting a puppy in January. I have a feeling she won’t be hanging out at the dog park.