The Kitty



The Kitty is not well. Very not well. I started syringe feeding him on New Years Eve, and he wasn't doing real well, but I thought he might be making some progress. I called the vet on the second to ask for some direction as to how much and how often I should be feeding him. He was not showing a lot of interest in self feeding and he was throwing up.

The vet told me the 70cc's a day I was feeding him was not enough and that he needed at least 240 cc's a day to get enough nourishment into his body to help is liver start to flush itself out. I went out and bought more syringes. It is not easy to find 10cc syringes and I have to make several stops to get enough of them. At one stop a pharmacist all but accuses me of being a dug seeker. I do finally get all six syringes that I needed (60ccs four times a day = 240ccs a day)

I go home and start filling syringes with cat food. This is isn't easy or clean and it makes a mess and I haven't even started feeding him yet. The Kitty has been getting his food this way for a couple of days but not in the amount. He doesn't love it. I don't love it, but it's important for his health so we persevere. I feed him about 230ccs over the evening Friday before I go to bed. The Kitty then throws up most of it all over my bed. I strip the bed and launder everything. The Kitty and I sleep though the night.

Saturday we start our morning with the first feeding of our day. It's a struggle. The kitty bites though my thumb. This does not make it easier to feed him as I need that thumb to prop his mouth open for the syringe. We feed again, and again. I hate this. He hates this. In the midst of all this my dishwasher stops working. Syringe feeding is messy and causes a lot of dishes. I hate this. I am not happy.

I decide that the syringes are the problem. I do some searching online and find reference to pastry bags. Bing!Bing!Bing! I have two pastry bags! This has made me happy and I have not been happy.

The Kitty is getting all this food. Hundreds of cc's a day of nourishment at least be showing some improvement. He isn't, if anything the addition of all this extra food has caused him to be even more sickly and more depressed and sickly. He can only walk a few steps at a time. How long does it take to work? How long does a liver need to flush itself? What if I'm not giving it enough time to work? I'm tired and his tired but what his fatigue is just a normal stage of the treatment?

I'm worried that this force feeding as caused food to go into his lungs and now he has pneumonia. On the upside, Saturday I took in the outdoor Christmas decorations and since he wasn't able to move, I didn't bother securing the door. I was coming inside as he was walking out the door! I was thrilled. I took him outside and let him bask in the sun, it made Dogger very happy when she was hurting and sick and I hoped it would make The Kitty happy too. He lay there for hours. Usually, when he is outside he runs for the hills. But he was outside in the sun and that made me feel like I was doing something for him.

I started to use the bags for the feedings and it's easier, faster and less messy. I can't be sure he's getting 240 ccs though and that concerns me but he's still getting getting a lot of food. When I have presented him with food and water to take in manually, it appears to make him nauseous, he's not throwing up though.

I know he's dying and I have told him he has my permission to go and he shouldn't stay for my sake. I am ready for him to be at peace. But whenever I think This is it. He's finished, I'm going to stop torturing him with the force feeding and I'm putting him down. Where is the emergency vets number? I wonder if they euthanize? . He perks up and I put thoughts of his death out of my mind.

He has an appointment with the vet Monday afternoon. I love him so much.