Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Food issues

I went to Burger Yucky for lunch. I call it Burger Yucky for a reason, because their food is yucky. I don't like the food. Much, or I wouldn't have ended up there. But I was there. I was standing in line and looking at the menu, why? I knew what I wanted, a number nine meal plain and dry, onion rings instead of fries and a coke. Very simple.

On the menu was something called The Angry Whopper

Available for a limited time only, the new Angry WHOPPER(r) sandwich features a flame-broiled burger patty topped with sizzling Angry onions, jalapenos, pepper jack cheese, bacon, tomatoes, lettuce and mayonnaise topped with Angry sauce on a sesame seed bun.

"Angry" onions?  I've been  through all my seed catalogues and I have yet to see any varity of onions named or described as "angry".  I've been up and down the condiment aisle at my Kroger and have not seen  a sauce that was labled as "angry"or tht was giving off any "angry" vibes to me. Sure, colors not found in nature, but not angry. I don't think I would want to eat an angry sauce. It sounds like something that would give you food poisoning on purpose.  I don't like mean food but I've also never attributed emotional states to my food. I never asked my broccoli how it was feeling or my chicken how it felt about the rice. I didn't know foods had inner lives.

I went online to see if I had really seen a sign for a  Whopper called "Angry" and shockingly, I did! They were serious about this. A Google search turned up a press release in a magazine aimed at franchise owners.

In conjunction with the new burger, BKC will also launch www.angry-gram.com, a humorous Web site that allows visitors to use the burger to deliver Angry-Gram e-mails to those who may be getting on their last nerve. Upon opening, the Angry WHOPPER(r) animates and humorously rebukes the recipient with a message recorded by the sender.

Okay. Are you angry? Do you want to get even more angry?! Eat  something Angry!  Make other people angry! How great! So I went to the site and looked at the Angry Grams.

"The Angry-Gram is the perfect way to let someone know they annoy the hell outta you. Tell us who they are and what they do to that drives you up the wall. We'll send over a screaming Angry WHOPPER Sandwich that'll really let them have it. Angry-Grams are intended to be humours and should not be used with the intent to harass".

When someone is "annoying the hell outta me", I kind of  want to harass them and I'm not interested in being "humorous" about it. Angered, I'm thinking that harassing them is a good idea and I am all about "intent", You are pissing me off! STOP IT! Before I do more than send you a vaguely threatening email" .  If I'm sending you an Angry-Gram, chances are I'm angry, and if I wasn't before ingesting the angry onions and the angry sauce, I am most certainly angry now.

Whatever. I read the directions, time to get the angry.

Dear __________,

I can't take it anymore.

Aaaaarrrggghhh! Your _________________ makes my blood boil. And your __________ is
soooooooo annoying. I want to throttle you when you___________________. I've never met anyone
as incredibly irritating.

Yours angrily,

___________________


I have to wonder what's going on in their marketing department. Did Burger King suffer some lay offs? Are there corporate mores issues? I don't want to go to Burger King to work out my emotional problems and I don't want them made worse by their food. I knew there was a reason that I don't eat there very often. I'm just not angry enough.

Time passed.

I went home and started on Job 3 of the garden's make over. To get the garden ready, I have to prepare the "soil". I was pleasantly surprised to actaully find soil in my yard! I knew my decision to hold off removing the leaves from my yard for the last few years was a good idea.  I wasn't being lazy,  I was composting.

The job was hard.  I did manual labor with the wrong tools! I discovered the task was a lot harder then it looked! I forgot to wear gloves! But it was worth it:

It doesn't look it, but its about 12 feet by 10 feet of cleared ground. I didn't do the detail work because I was concentrating on clearing the ground. I did pull some green weeds and grass by thye roots but I left behind the dead stuff. I was heartened to find many soil ariated worms and no crop destroying grubs.
 There is still a lot to do but I think I've made a good start. Today after work I'm going to see if I can get the dead plants out, but if it's too hard I'll just till them in over the weekend, but if I can get them out I would like that better. I don't really want to till weeds back into the ground so they can come back. I didn't have weeds last go around and I liked it that way.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow! Our ground (and everything else) refroze last night, with no warming up in sight. By the way, congratulations on your hard work and new(?) garden plot.

Unknown said...

It's supposed to get cold again this weekend here but they aren't saying freezing, just colder. The garden isn't new, its improved. Last years garden just ran along that fence and it was about two feet wide. This weekend we till!