Mission Unaccomplished.

I used to have a rake. It was nice, padded handle,  early version ergonomic rake end, I really liked it. I really like my leaf blower too but the leave blower just blows and sometimes the leaves need more direction; for it those cases you need a rake. A good rake. A rake with a padded handle and an ergonomic rake end. And then my rake disappeared.

I decided that before we get into All the leaves are brown and the skies are gray territory, that I would be proactive and go and get a new one. I looked online and did some price checking and I learned that very few outlets have rakes at this time of  year. They are all excited about selling halloween costumes, but they don't want to sell leave rakes. I think the cherry picking is ugly.

Its fall it's autumn it's leaves falling and scarecrows and pumpkins and Halloween and sweaters and all that. And do you know what all those things have in common? Rakes! I want my rake. I asked the birthday fairy for a rake and the birthday fairy came up dry, so I went to get a rake. One of the few places that advertised online as having my rake was Target. I did a bad thing. A dangerous thing. I went to Target.

Well. I looked all over that Target. I found three rakes but they were all the wrong rake. How dare online Target lie to me? They said they had the rake and they did not. They had an old fashioned, non-ergonomic version, a new fashioned retractable model, which I'm sure is charming and funny and tells interesting stories but I don't want that kind! I want one that makes me look borderline pretentious. I want one of those rakes. And damn it, Target was supposed to carry it for $25.  And they did not, not for any price. I hope Target doesn't make me wait until all the leaves are brown and piled up in my yard before they get my rake out on the floor. Once I have my future  rake, it could also disappear at some point, but then I see myself going on a killing spree. I'm going to have to take better care of any future rake, for the sake of humanity.

I was in a Target and I was there to spend money and I was thwarted  but I was still going to spend money. Damn it. So I spent money. Instead of a rake, I bought a neat black and purple plastic plate, two solar lights that change color - On sale! and a Snoopy mug for a dollar. I  spent slightly less than what I was going to spend on my rake. I hate Target.