Happy Happy

My birthday is  at the end of the month and in honor of that I started my party early by buying myself a birthday gift. Because I am over forty and this is just what happens to you, I spent too much for something I in all honesty I could have either done without or done just as well with less. If I was male and wealthy I would buy a red sports car or a blond. I'm not so I went in a different direction.

But a girl only turns forty-two once and I am very pleased with my new toy. I believe in fact that we were fated to be together. I was at the store for a different reason and I saw it there, splayed out on the table looking all sexy and available and on sale and I said Hmm. I want that. I need that, I stood there and fondled it until a worker bee ran into me with a cherry picker. I took that as a hint that perhaps it was time to move on, if we were really meant to be together the separation would not effect our bond.

I was at the store for a purpose and it was not to add to my toy collection. I found what I needed and  I went home. On the way home I thought wistfully of my lost love. Time passed, hours even and I had not stopped thinking about my truw lurve. I  spent those hours trying to talk myself out of it.

You don't need it. Everyone you own all ready has one and you can just borrow theirs

 But then I would say :

Everyone has one at their house! Emphases on their house, not my house. If everyone has one at their house, it just goes to prove that I should have one at my house too!

To that I answered :

You have many options to choose from! If you want one, go borrow one of theirs! How often do you need to play with this toy anyway? Come on!

Yeah but:

Its on sale!

I won. I went back to the store and hoped that it had waited for me, because its about fate here after all. if it was still there then we were meant to be together. Great Joy! It had!  My very own Black and Decker 24 inch Hedge Hog loved me too! It is truly a thing of beauty. I took my new best friend home with me. My shrubbery will never be the same! Thank gawd because those mofos are out-of-control! my dog can't look out her window! She is thwarted ion her desire to survey the grounds! How can she protect my property if she can't even see out the damn window? Its really an issue of security, not because I believe that the shrubberies are mocking me.

 I was going to post a picture of my new toy along side pictures of the out-of-control, mocking shrubberies but Blogger doesn't want me to  post pictures this evening. Bummer, but at the same time I can keep my shameful shrub issues between me and my neighbors and you can look up the trimmer if you want to.I also think my neighbors will be pleased by gift. The neighbors I think,  join the shrubberies with the cruel mocking, even the renters have in-control shrubberies and their own trimmers

Not anymore.