Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Everyday is fun

I was pulling into the post office to buy stamps after work and I thought to myself Why didn't I do this at lunch. I could have done this at lunch. What did I do at lunch? And I had to keep asking myself that. I had done something I was sure, but I couldn't remember. I knew I had gone to work, spent the day at work and then came to the post office. I certainly did not go to the post office at lunch, so that got one option of the list but I could not for the life of me remember what I did four hours before.

I sat in the car while I tried to come up with what exactly I did Am I some sort of secret killer? Am I a drunk and I lost time? Did I get abducted by aliens? it really took a few minutes to remember that I had lunch at Burger Yucky and bought lipstick at Kerr Drugs . I needed the lip stick and the Burger Yucky is in the parking lot, so I did something useful but I should have gone  then and picked up stamps  and then afterwords had a healthier meal at the Chinese place. Or I could have gone to Wallyworld and bought more dog food and stamps and then ate a healthier mean at Subway and been efficient.

Okay. memories re-established. I was not killing a foreign head of state, I was not careening around drunkenly somewhere and I did not spend my lunch hour being probed. Good to get that cleared up.  Safe in that knowledge I went into the post office.

Why is it that every time I go to the post office I wind up waiting behind some jackass who is either trying to send  a money order to alpha centauri or is in the middle of sending a bass boat home to the  Balkans - in paper bags with the wrong tape? I mean every single time! And I don't understand it.

I have stopped mail, started mail, moved multiple times, mailed packages, picked up deliveries and generally used the hell out of the USPS and I have never taken up more than the most brief period of time I could. Everyone else is getting massive money orders - Why? is this not something they have stores built around? Where everyone there is trying to send  $1000 home to some former Soviet block nation? Why do we have to do this at the post office and if we must do this at the post office, why can't we fill out the forms, say, before we foul the line for 45 minutes while we do so? Its like going to the cash machine and waiting while someone tries to get his summer place re-financed. Just becuase you can do something it does not mean you have to. And then why while we're trying to fill out thirty-seven pages of paperwork, why can't the clerk help  the next in line?

Because he is a dick.

And when I finally got to the front the jack ass clerk almost wouldn't take my card because I hadn't signed it and I countered with  I wrote on the back to ask for ID, so you would ask for ID and he said that that made the card unusable because it wasn't signed and he could barely read it anyway. and he shouldn't accept the card at all.  I told him he would accept the card and thought to myself in reality it isn't about what he wants as long as the the machine charges the card he can suck it the self satisfied son of a bitch it was okay and he suggested I read the small print on the back of the card  and I took my paid for stamps and walked out.

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