Thursday, August 2, 2012

Blech and Blech-ier

Tuesday night I was getting my sports on watching the Olympics and being all patriotic and shit and I heard this sound from the kitchen and then I heard it again and I told Small Cat to knock it off and come watch the TV with me. He's been camped out in the kitchen for a week  and I thought it was because he likes the coolness of the floor.

And then he ran into the dining room and he wasn't alone, he had something in his mouth and I thought "Oh, its a lizard. I wonder where he found it?" and then I got closer and really looked at what he had in his mouth and I screamed.

He had a mouse in his mouth! A living mouse in his mouth! A mouse! a mouse in my house1 OMG I'm going to die of plauge! Vermin in my home!  I should not have screamed because maybe he might have finished the job instead of  spitting the living mouse out .

Wednesday night I went to Wallyworld and picked up some mousetraps , they come in sets of four, and are made in the same town one of my cousins lives in. I thought this was a good sign. I also picked up some peanut butter bait. This mouse business was going to be over and I was going to put on my bog girl panties Wednesday morning and dispose of the mouse. I was going to medal in mouse expulsion.

Have you ever tried to set a mouse trap? Do you know how cheap mouse traps are? Do you know why they give you so many of them?  Its because, as it turns out, they are single use! Mess up trying to get one of them set and it is done! Your finger tips are a lovely aubergine and the mouse, who you can absolutely hear snickering at your  ineptitude, parties on.  A freaking mouse in my house! I have a cat I should have no mice! And now I have a mouse that knows that I am too clumsy to kill him!

What Mr. Mouse doesn't know is that there are glue traps out there and my ineptitude won't be in play.  Mr. Mouse as choices, he can leave on his own, he can submit to Small Cat and go out like a champian or he can die badly  in a glue trap. Leave or suffer a bad death Mr. Mouse.

 "And we meet again Mr. Mouse"
Faster Kitty Cat, Kill, Kill!

Mouse was playing possum. You know, a mouse trap would kill the little beast not let it go to play another day. I have to stop feeding Small Cat.


Who knocked it off the curtains? I did!

Who is probably killing it slowly under the trash can? I am. I couldn't do it. I , I feel, very heroically slipped my late plastic cutting board under the can and also very heroically carried the mess outside and let nature take its course. Hopefully  the feral cat is named "Nature".

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