Thursday, October 17, 2013

Just say No Comment.


I ran into these little boys while walking with Rocket and we had a nice chat and one asked if Rocket was neutered - points for vocab for that kid, but he said Rocket didn't look fixed. I was like, how do I have the conversation without sounding like a perv? Have my vet sin a statement contesting to the fact that  he had huge out sized balls prior to his surgery? The vet was impressed and shocked by the brass ones that dog was carrying around. Now, he is not even  shadow of what he once was, he is down to a tiny, nickel plated ball-ette now.

I was like Dudes, I can't really talk about the relative size my dogs former genitals with you, I'm pretty sure there are statutes in place against forty-five year old women having those kinds of conversations with eleven year old boys.

Post fix he looks much more sleek. Much more like a seal. A tall seal, a seal that grew legs and needed long ears to be symmetrical! That's his Halloween costume! He's a Land Seal! Ta Da! He looks fixed damn it.  Ask him, I know he's noticed the difference.

Speaking of the dog, he has taught me a trick.  He goes into the kitchen and I take him outside and he pees. Super. Then we go back into the house and go back to whatever we were doing. As soon as we're settled, he goes back to the kitchen and rings the bells on the door to signal he needs to go back outside. We retrace our steps and he voids completely. Why he couldn't do this on the first trip there is no answer. I don't rush him or hurry him along post potty, he wees and heads back to the house.

He is also making the couch look much more comfortable than I ever thought possible. I've had I for fifteen years and its never been more than a prop - but now,  thanks to Rocket, its functioning as a real couch for the first time in its life, I'm discovering after fifteen years that its actually really comfortable and nap-ready and it can do more than hold up  festive throw pillows and function as a enormous dust catcher. Oh that Rocket! Is there anything he can't make better?  He's is truly a magical land seal.

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