Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Filling a need

I've spent the evening  writing  Rockets initial appointment with the NC State Vet School Behavioral Medicine unit. Our appointment isn't until the middle of September, but I want to get as much down as I can. I have already forgotten a lot of incidents because so much of it is now everyday stuff. Aren't all dogs emotionally disturbed? Doesn't everybody deal with this? What problem? WE DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM! I BRING MY DOG WITH ME EVERYWHERE BECAUSE I LOVE HIM AND I AM GOOD DOG PERSON!

In the few minutes this evening I wasn't trying to figure out how much information I could fit onto a PDF,  I was taking care of a craving. I have wanted cinnamon toast for weeks! I have dreams about wheat toast and butter and cinnamon-fake-sugar. I decided that today was the end of the road for that, well actually, tomorrow morning is going to be the end of the road for that and I'm going to see how good a toaster my toaster oven actually is.

I thought eating before going to the store was supposed to be a good idea. It was not. I clearly need to up my serving size. I hit the doors and immediately decided that I needed to get some peaches. I had a peach last week and it rocked my world, and I need more world rocking. I bought four. Then I remembered that I had run out of sugar free popsicles! This is end of the world stuff here! So I got some popsicles! I tracked down the bread aisle and was a little horrified.

To buy bread you have to buy an entire loaf of bread! Since I have become a little more sensitive, okay, a lot more acutely aware, of how many carbs I take in,  I have developed a carb phobia, and this seemed like a  lot of carbs, even if they are healthy whole wheat carbs, that is a lot of carbs. I dug around a little and found the shortest loaf of whole wheat bread I could find. It was still a trial.

I think my body wants me to feed us more carbs, I'm been very vigilant but perhaps I have been too vigilant and in response to my vigilants, my body wants more. It is difficult to ignore peer pressure from your body and in general its a bad idea to ignore strongly worded messages from your body. Its good practice to to not  ignore See Me! sticky on your bathroom mirror. Because to do so is to invite eating disorders and no one wants to be the poor sad thing that the even poorer and sadder Lifetime Movie is based on.

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