Friday, October 24, 2014
The Cutest Loser
We didn't win the costume contest or the cutest dog. We didn't enter the cutest dog, but if we had, we would have lost.
We lost the costume contest to a lab mix who just had massive sinus surgery, a pug that came dressed in Starbucks cups - Pugkin Spice Latte and a chiwawa with rain cancer. Brain Cancer. A chiwawa with brain cancer! Who can compete with that?! The next time I'm daft enough to enter Rocket in one of their contests I'm going to have to come clean about his Separation Anxiety and how destructive he can be, and all his meds he takes every day and the fact we go to the Vet School for treatment. I have to be honest and open about how pitiful he really is.But he isn't pitiful! He's healthy and strong and friendly and wonderful! He's almost perfect and I don't want to shame him by spilling all his secrets.
Big dogs don't have much of a chance either. The winners are always adopta-puppies, very small dogs, or rescues with tragic back stories. Pure breds from breeders have no chance in hell. This is making me feel very small. I am small. The tiny brain cancer chiwawa was dressed as Bat Man and his ears were bigger than Rockets'. He also snapped at Rocket, but he was cute. Please note Rocket is also very cute and he did not snap back.
I want them to have different classes, I think that would be better. They could have the Puppy Dog class, the Tiny Dog class, the Rescue Dog Class and the Sick Dog. So a healthy adult dog doesn't have to compete against an eight week old lab, a heartworm positive suspected bait dog rescue from the streets, or a three legged dog with an upper respitory infection. It would be more fair. I mean let the heartworm and the three legged dog duke it out, let the tiny dogs see who is the champion not-cat is, and let the other dogs see who is the cutest healthy animal is.
Every month its like a contest to see which dog is the most pitiful, whose back story is the most disturbing, and who is the most sad.
I did win $25 in the raffle and that made me happy but I was not happy that the same person won four different times. Mix the tickets up a bit! Limit how many times a single individual can win! Something, anything! Let My Dog Win all ready!