Have they Got a Deal For Me

Lets check the mailbag shall we?

According the mass mailers my screen name is male and horney . My box is always full of missives such as:


Introducing Doctor Formulated HGH - This miracle product will make me taller, smarter, and younger and somehow cause my penis to get bigger. I am a woman, so this product is amazing.

Voila de novellas photos et des novellas videos - I will learn French.

. «ö¤ë¤J±b®I¼Æ : ¥N«È½s»sDz¼¡B}¦, - I will also speak gibberish.

All New Digital descramblers - Actually, about penis enlargment.

Revolutionary SEXUAL PERFORMANCE ENHANCER, - Speaks for itself.

RX Pharmacy is a professional, responsible and secure online service offering patients all throughout the world easy, discreet access - Should I be too embarrassed to go to the drug store for Doctor Formulated HGH.

I just noticed. As a woman I have been programmed to be suspicious of my body. It is too fat, too flat; too flabby… none of the mass mailing are about me. No mail order feminine hygiene. No herbal birth control, no magic bras or tush lifters, nothing to make my pores smaller my eyes bigger or my chest more chesty, Why? No adds for sexual enhancements for me? All the sex ads came with graphics detailing how fab my penis will be and the tricks I can teach it. Nothing for my genitalia? I feel left out.


And amazing not everything is about my needs; I have friends who have more material needs, so -

You can save 20% NOW On GREAT gift ideas and much much more. Glass Dragons and more, Patchwork animals.

And of course the Grand Daddy of them all - The Nigerian bank issue. In this case, his daughter.

Miss. Julia SAVIMBI -

Let me read from you soon so that we can ascertain the next step to take. Also include in your return mail, your private fax so that I can contact you and send to you some deposit evidence. Issued to my late father by the Security firm during the deposit.


There are ways of avoid this mess. You can go to the bottom of the post and tell them to stop sending you this crap IF they make that available. Bastards.

And when I run out of spam from strangers I get spammed by my friends. I hate chain letters. Back in day I received a chain letter through snail mail. I read it, burned it, and sent it back. No more chain mail.

Now I get thinly veiled threats.

PASS ON THESE NATURAL HIGHS TO AT LEAST 7 PEOPLE IN THE NEXT HALF HOUR AND
SOMETHING FANTASTIC WILL HAPPEN TO YOU IN THE NEXT FEW HOURS. Be sure to send it back to the person who sent it to you! Then send it on to five other people, including the one who sent it to you. Within hours five people have prayed for you, and you caused a multitude of people to pray for other people. Then sit back and watch the power of God work in your life.

P. S.Five is good, but more is better Please do NOT let this petition stop and lose all these names. If you do not want to sign it, please forward it to everyone you know. Thank you!!! Send this to all of your friends! But - you HAVE to send this within 1 hour from when you open it!

Guess what? I deleted the names! I didn't turn around and spam my friends! Shocking. Whatever shall we do? I wish there was a way to burn this crap and send it back. It worked for me once.

RE : Your Spam

Dear Friend,

Love you, but send this mail box filler to me again and you will need everyone you know to pray for you, there will be nothing fantastic happening for you. Pepsi/Proctor and Gamble/The Great THEY will grow stronger, In God We Trust will disappear from our lexicon our money and possibly the heavens and the prayer chain will be broken: As a result your penis will wither, you roof will fall in and your dog will take ill.

Love and God Bless!
me

So not only am I responsible for a lack of fantastic, I didn' t pray for a multitude of people. I have a giant penis that doesn't work. Someday there will be enough women on line (if there isn't all ready) and I too will be marketed too, until that time I will have to stuff my bra with glass dragons and patchwork animals. Pity me.