Pink and Lavender hell

I needed to get some cards. Three birthdays and a funeral are looming and I need to be prepared. I’m not actually expecting to attend the funeral but I will be hitting two of the three birthdays.

My plan was to hit the conveniently located Hallmark, only I remembered they closed the conveniently located Hallmark and I would have to go to the less conveniently located Hallmark, but still not completely inconvenient Hallmark. When you aren’t going to send a gift: Send a genuine Hallmark embossed envelope.

Less conveniently located, and it was also closed. Onward to the completely inconvenient Hallmark.

On the way there I remembered that there was a Target in the same shopping center and made an executive decision : I would buy the cards at Target instead.

Poverty Barn usually takes care of my greeting card needs but I wanted to go a little further, the last time someone at work had a death in the family, I bought a card at a dollar store over lunch and I still feel bad about it. I swore I would do better the next time.

Target loves product placement. I think every card I looked at was tied to some Disney Channel or Nickelodeon show. It made me tired. I was finally successful with the birthday girls - Years ago, when my friends were having their little girls, I made a promise my self that I would never buy any pink and lavender pre-fab Princess crap for anybody- I had no idea how hard this was going to be keep! Today there is a whole pink and lavender pre-fab Princessindustrial complex! With some effort, I made it through the pink and lavender pre-fab Princess desert in one piece, cards in hand.

Then it was on the sympathy card. I really had to look. Target is not about mourning or sadness. It is all about happy birthdays, happy anniversaries, happy retirements and happy weddings. This from the first place I ever saw a wide selection of sympathy cards for owners of deceased pets! Target has changed.

This year the colors of mourning at Target are blues and browns and greens. .I didn’t know that Isaac Mizrahi had expanded his line to include sympathy cards. It was a little off -putting. Everything was so color coordinated and suitable for framing. And like a lot of Isaac Mizrai’s line, nothing really fit right. I was afraid I was going to have to go to Hallmark after all. I did finally find the right card but I shouldn’t have had to circle the card section three times to find it.

Cards selected, I went to go see what else I needed. Tiny E has her first whole birthday coming up. I need toys. Hallmark may have a better selection for sympathy cards but Target has them beat in the toy aisle. I assumed.

Pre-fab pink and lavender Princess Industrial complex hell! Tiny E came thisclose to getting a great big dump truck! And a itty bitty baby rip saw! I totally kid you not. If Rescue Me sold branded fire trucks, I would have brought one home.

Fortunately for me, for the time being, Tiny E is still in a primary colored world and I found the baby toy section - or I thought I did. Everything looked like you could put them in the dishwasher, was big and clumsy and loud and not easily swallowed, I was sure it was the baby toy aisle. I kept falling in love with a toy, seeing myself playing with it, watching Tiny E playing with it, playing with it with Tiny E, and just as I was about to take it home - For Ages 4 and Up !@#$%^&*( !!! .

I also hate toys that make noise or require batteries so why am I even trying to find a toy in 2007?! I ended up crushing on a toy that while it makes noise, does not appear to need batteries. Yay?