Tuesday, June 3, 2008

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I wanted to be a good guy and be nice to the pets so I turned the a/c on - And I faith that when I told the a/c to turn on that it did... When I turned on the a/c I also pulled the blinds and closed the drapes and I did all this in the early evening, and it did magically become cooler inside, so it’s not entirely naive of me to be under the impression my air conditioner was functioning, It got cool and there was air coming from the vents. I know now of course, that there is a living thing in my vents and I was feeling its breath... it’s probably the worlds largest cockroach. It doesn’t matter, I called my a/c man and he’s going to be here tomorrow to slay the mighty cockroach beast or replace some widget. Six of one, half a dozen of the other. When I come home from work it will to a home with a working a/c.

The animals, have been real troopers. The Kitty for his part doesn’t seem terribly bothered by heat, he would sleep in a hot oven as long as the oven light didn’t get in his eyes too much. The Kitty could live on the sun and be happy. Dogger on the other hand would be happy in a world where it was always February. Dogger would live on Neptune and be happy about it.

Sunday night I took pity on Dogger and sprung her from what had morphed into the surface of the sun and let her sleep with me and The Kitty and the Worlds Greatest Window Unit upstairs on Neptune, the WGWU is ancient and yet it works like a charm. I think someday I’m going to find out that it is illegally importing Freon from Mexico and it goes out at night and eats spotted owls and protected salamanders - but really, I don’t care why it works, I’m just glad it does.

I made two calls this morning, the first to the a/c man and the second to the vet. Dogger did a weird thing MOnday morning and it had me worried, I went to do my daily head count before I left for work and this time I couldn’t find Dogger.

Because Dogger was under the bed. Dogger is huge and lately, she’s wide, not only is she wide, she is verging on the fat. I can’t fit under that bed under the best of circumstances, not to mention that I "store" a lot of stuff under that bed. Before she got under there, she had to excavate it first.

And then she wouldn’t come out. I pulled, I tugged, I begged, I bribed. I was crouched by the bed thinking - How am I going to get her out from under there? What if she can’t get out? I can’t lift this bed. Am I going to have to just leave her here and hope she can get out on her own? Should I call Broskey and have him come over at lunch? . This was a real problem.

After I finally got her out and back upstairs to Neptune, I called the vet.

The vet checked her over, studied her electrolytes and announced that she’s fine. She’s weird, but she’s fine.

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