Thursday, January 29, 2015

Admitting you have a problem is the first step

I hate the winter. I don't hate it because its cold, I resent it because its cold, I hate it because it gets dark too damn early and aggressively compresses my schedule after work.

Today I had to go to Sams, less than two miles from my office, to pick up meds for the dog. I hurry over there and wait in a line of me while the pharmacy clerk did something that involved not helping me while we burned daylight.

Since I had all ready missed my Dog Walk window, I decided to make a pass around the store to see if there was anything I needed. I found that I needed a tub of blueberries large enough to sate the third worlds needs for blueberries.

For a super food they are really low key, no capes, no flash wheels, no cool toys. I like that in a super thing. They keep it real. I finally made it home and decided since I could not walk, that I should eat something other than blueberries and so I made dinner. It was good.

Dog and I watched TV and then, feeling I needed to get some exercise, I went to Target to return an overpriced and unneeded phone charger. I stretched my legs and then took us to Wally World to pick up dog food and as it turned out, a mid-sized bag of cheetos. The unsung mayor of Lowcarbville ( really, you can eat more two pretty good handfuls and not sin at all). I didn't walk in to Wallyworld to get cheetos but what can you do? Wally World! Sadly, what happens in Wally World doesn't stay in Wally World, you have to bring the evidence home with you. And on your fingers and teeth.

Wally World is not for the weak of will. Or maybe it is, maybe that is the reason for Wally World, it where your weak will gets explored and discovered. Your weak will gets a great work out at Wally World.Wally celebrates your weak will.

You never know how weak your will really is until you pass that display of deeply discounted pajama sets. You don't really need any more PJs and frankly, the selection is thin and they are all kinds of ugly and when did they start using upholstery fabric for sleepwear anyway? But they are so cheap! and maybe you need them and when are you going to see PJs made from indoor out door carpet again? or that pair made from fiber board? If all that is too much, how about a glow in the dark nighty? or a safety orange bra? Or maybe you should just go gaze upon the 48 count electric blue cup cakes?

Wally World, stocked with what you don't want, don't need and can't live without.

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