Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Best Friends


What do dogs think about all day? Why is my dog always so ready for bed in the evening? Does he have a really fulfilling inner life and an active imagination? Does he exhaust himself under the weight of his vibrant thoughts?

Without the danger of the animal actually expressing itself to us, what kind of knowledge do they have? They could know everything Who does God talk to? Who does He work idea through with? Who is Gods sounding board? Could it be dogs?

Why not? They don't have a translatable  language, really, I know its possible in a laboratory setting to kind of suss out the dogs emotional response to given stimuli but they can't understand specifically what they are saying. God could  constantly be sharing everything with these creatures and who would know?

He isn't going to talk with anyone from the ape kingdom, they can be taught sign, He isn't going to visit with dolphins because they would tell everyone everything! They are all ready speaking with picture boards  and are trainable as assassins- Who can he trust?

Dogs.

True, dogs can be trained to kill, but they can't be trained to kill specific individuals. They can be trained to tear off the limbs anyone who smells funny, or is carrying a very specific item, or anyone running from them, but they can't be told Hey, I need you  bring me Steve Whatsits femur, he lives at 5555 East Street. He has a green chevy. Go.. We just can not communicate with them effectively and they have no reason to help us translate dog into human. They talk to God, they don't need to talk  to us about their feelings. And they are not going to explain electrical surges from beyond Saturn to us either.

So. A dogs day.

Wake up, take a good pee, move the bowels, eat some food, sniff some stuff,  brown bag lunch with God,bark at some suspicious dead leaves, explore the meaning of life with God, go back to sleep, wake up, take another good dump, chew the hell out of that toy, sniff some guys crotch. Discuss more stuff with God, go back to sleep. Eat some kibble, take a pee, move the bowels, sit down meeting with God, take a nap. Chew some toy,  go back to bed.

Rocket is always ready to go to bed. It doesn't matter if we walked six miles or if we didn't make it further than the car port. He is exhausted. What is he thinking about? Man, I peed like a racehorse today! I took a good dump every four hours and I chewed the living hell out of that toy! I am so totally spent.

Why is he so tired? Massive, heavy thoughts all day! Really good, really long meetings with God  two, three times a day! Rocket and the other dogs are privy to the secrets of the cosmos, the cures for cancers, where all those people go who just disappear, why mental illness, where do things go when they just seem to evaporate,  why is there evil? why are people just so mean sometimes, why pain? why airplants? why aren't flowers plaid? why aren't there green people?

Dogs aren't only man's best friend... Its the only explanation of how a creature that sleeps eighteen hours a day can still take a nap with you on a dime.

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