Helping the economy
Over lunch I bought two bottles of champaign at the grocery store for a total of $12.67. For two bottles of champagne. From the grocery store. You can't buy champaign at a liquor store in NC, you have to go to your grocery store. Do you have any idea how bad grocery store champagne is? But not mine , on accident I picked up one bottle of not-so-bad.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Where everybody knows your name
The vet finally got back with me late in the afternoon about the test. The Kitty did not do well on the test, he failed the test. The Kitty has a sick liver. The liver is not dying, but it's still not a healthy liver. There is hope though, it's treatable in some cases, and in involves feeding the cat... And pills, lots of pills. The Kitty needs to eat to live. This is an animal that up until say, Friday, lived to eat. He stopped eating and a couple of days later was looking down liver failure. In a healthy cat individual there is a liver value - that is supposed to be between 10-100, The Kitty's value was 516 .
Well, what can I say. What's it like to have pets that aren't sick? I mean, what is it like to not have a wing named after you at your vets office? One of the vets in the practice has a boat called the S.S. Dogger . I would really like to know what its like to only take your pets to the vet once a year for vaccines. I think at this point I would be happy if the office staff didn't greet me by name when I walk in - Totally charming in your favorite bar, totally not charming at your doctors office.
The vet wanted to do an ultrasound to see what's happening in the liver you know to see how much is viable and to look for well, tumors. His eyes and gums are not yellow and I do not want to look for tumors. I think that ultrasounds are very fab for pregnant women with insurance, they are not fab for kitties with no insurance. I'm willing to forgo that expense and spring for maybe an x-ray or another blood test. Speaking of blood tests. Kitty all ready gets blood tests multiple times a year. Between the twice yearly blood draws for the pred and his thyroid - Not at the same time, No we go in four times a year for blood draws - That one of those visits might have noted elevated liver values? Like the one we had done in NOVEMBER. I can't believe that his numbers got as bad as they did as fast as they did and no one noticed. He didn't eat for two days and he suddenly develops liver disease?
Deep breaths. Part of the treatment, along with food and antibiotics is an expensive pill that he can only take on an empty stomach - A condition I am supposed to be working to prevent. If I am doing my job right, he shouldn't ever have an empty stomach! Arrgh. In the interests of getting him to eat without the application of force, the vet sold me some sexy wet cat food and The Kitty predictably was very turned on. He ate about a third of a can (small) all by himself and then I applied some force so he could have a half a can. I think I'll give him the empty stomach pill in the AM - But he's still on his thyroid med and the pred, both should be taken with food so I'm not exactly sure how this is all going to work. More arrgh.
Did I speak with a vet about this? Did a vet speak to me? Oh hell no. I'm just supposed to figure it out. The tech who did speak to me had not a clue and when the vet called earlier she was not familiar with his chart. She was all about his acute issue and I had to remind her that there is more than an acute illness in play here, he is chronically ill as well. He's got a chart like a phone book, you would think reading it might have occurred to someone there.
So I'm scared to death and in deep denile as to what is going to happen. I read a lot of literature and feeding the cats seems to be a huge part of the cure. In my mind if I feed my kitty I can save his life.
Oh yeah. HAPPY NEW YEAR !!!!
The vet finally got back with me late in the afternoon about the test. The Kitty did not do well on the test, he failed the test. The Kitty has a sick liver. The liver is not dying, but it's still not a healthy liver. There is hope though, it's treatable in some cases, and in involves feeding the cat... And pills, lots of pills. The Kitty needs to eat to live. This is an animal that up until say, Friday, lived to eat. He stopped eating and a couple of days later was looking down liver failure. In a healthy cat individual there is a liver value - that is supposed to be between 10-100, The Kitty's value was 516 .
Well, what can I say. What's it like to have pets that aren't sick? I mean, what is it like to not have a wing named after you at your vets office? One of the vets in the practice has a boat called the S.S. Dogger . I would really like to know what its like to only take your pets to the vet once a year for vaccines. I think at this point I would be happy if the office staff didn't greet me by name when I walk in - Totally charming in your favorite bar, totally not charming at your doctors office.
The vet wanted to do an ultrasound to see what's happening in the liver you know to see how much is viable and to look for well, tumors. His eyes and gums are not yellow and I do not want to look for tumors. I think that ultrasounds are very fab for pregnant women with insurance, they are not fab for kitties with no insurance. I'm willing to forgo that expense and spring for maybe an x-ray or another blood test. Speaking of blood tests. Kitty all ready gets blood tests multiple times a year. Between the twice yearly blood draws for the pred and his thyroid - Not at the same time, No we go in four times a year for blood draws - That one of those visits might have noted elevated liver values? Like the one we had done in NOVEMBER. I can't believe that his numbers got as bad as they did as fast as they did and no one noticed. He didn't eat for two days and he suddenly develops liver disease?
Deep breaths. Part of the treatment, along with food and antibiotics is an expensive pill that he can only take on an empty stomach - A condition I am supposed to be working to prevent. If I am doing my job right, he shouldn't ever have an empty stomach! Arrgh. In the interests of getting him to eat without the application of force, the vet sold me some sexy wet cat food and The Kitty predictably was very turned on. He ate about a third of a can (small) all by himself and then I applied some force so he could have a half a can. I think I'll give him the empty stomach pill in the AM - But he's still on his thyroid med and the pred, both should be taken with food so I'm not exactly sure how this is all going to work. More arrgh.
Did I speak with a vet about this? Did a vet speak to me? Oh hell no. I'm just supposed to figure it out. The tech who did speak to me had not a clue and when the vet called earlier she was not familiar with his chart. She was all about his acute issue and I had to remind her that there is more than an acute illness in play here, he is chronically ill as well. He's got a chart like a phone book, you would think reading it might have occurred to someone there.
So I'm scared to death and in deep denile as to what is going to happen. I read a lot of literature and feeding the cats seems to be a huge part of the cure. In my mind if I feed my kitty I can save his life.
Oh yeah. HAPPY NEW YEAR !!!!
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Kitty
All of a sudden he’s so little. I feel like I can hold him in one hand. He’s shrunk.
At first I thought he was just mad at me because barfing and leaving cat bombs out of spite is not beyond him. I ran out of his food right around Thanksgiving and had to use a allegedly gluten free substitute.. I would argue it’s gluten freeness. It seemed kind of gluten-y. I switched back to his old food and then I thought he was mad at me because I was making dog cookies and spending a lot of time in the kitchen with Dogger. The Kitty is all about his grudge. Time passed. No more cat bombs!
But then little barfy bomb-lets began to appear again, these coincided with a visit by Mini Kitty and I naturally blamed her. But there were bomb-lets where there was not Mini. I thought then that he was the source and he was being grudgy that there was this other cat in his house. I kept them separated and thought this would help - And it did, until it didn’t and The Kitty was spending a lot of time in his foam house.
Then there were the Kitty unfriendly changes. I now new ginormous area rug in the living room. The thing about beautiful floors is that to keep them that way they must be kept out of sight. I also scored a very lovely dresser for the upstairs and that provoked me to move the heretofore unused futon from the upstairs to the office. I The Kitty was being hidey because he was unhappy about the changes. He had loved the futon.
I was away from the house a lot. I left and he was fine, I came back and he was not. Very, very not. When I left he was eating. When I came back he was not. Days late, I jumped into action. He was listless, weak and flat. Also, after he threw up on me, he threw up on the floor and then fell into it. I gave him his second bath ever, he had his first bath ten years ago. 10 years! I’ve had my kitty for ten years. The last time he fought me, hard, ten years later, he just lay there, flat. I decided he was listless because he was dehydrated. I hydrated him. He didn’t fight having a syringe forced down his throat. Flat.
Saturday night we curled up and watched War Inc., John Cusack does not approve of the Iraq war and he hates Dick Cheney and Haliburton. A lot. I also finished up Woof, a book of essays about peoples love for their dogs. Mostly their dead dogs. Looking back I probably should have stuck to my double issue of Entertainment Weekly. Sunday he was not improved but he was a little annoyed by the involuntary hydration program I had instituted. Monday I called the vet and $216 later we knew his bladder was full while his bowels were empty. I was shocked since he hadn’t eaten in DAYS and I had been forcing water down his throat. The vet took $140 worth of blood and will let me know Tuesday why The Kitty is flat.
All of a sudden he’s so little. I feel like I can hold him in one hand. He’s shrunk.
At first I thought he was just mad at me because barfing and leaving cat bombs out of spite is not beyond him. I ran out of his food right around Thanksgiving and had to use a allegedly gluten free substitute.. I would argue it’s gluten freeness. It seemed kind of gluten-y. I switched back to his old food and then I thought he was mad at me because I was making dog cookies and spending a lot of time in the kitchen with Dogger. The Kitty is all about his grudge. Time passed. No more cat bombs!
But then little barfy bomb-lets began to appear again, these coincided with a visit by Mini Kitty and I naturally blamed her. But there were bomb-lets where there was not Mini. I thought then that he was the source and he was being grudgy that there was this other cat in his house. I kept them separated and thought this would help - And it did, until it didn’t and The Kitty was spending a lot of time in his foam house.
Then there were the Kitty unfriendly changes. I now new ginormous area rug in the living room. The thing about beautiful floors is that to keep them that way they must be kept out of sight. I also scored a very lovely dresser for the upstairs and that provoked me to move the heretofore unused futon from the upstairs to the office. I The Kitty was being hidey because he was unhappy about the changes. He had loved the futon.
I was away from the house a lot. I left and he was fine, I came back and he was not. Very, very not. When I left he was eating. When I came back he was not. Days late, I jumped into action. He was listless, weak and flat. Also, after he threw up on me, he threw up on the floor and then fell into it. I gave him his second bath ever, he had his first bath ten years ago. 10 years! I’ve had my kitty for ten years. The last time he fought me, hard, ten years later, he just lay there, flat. I decided he was listless because he was dehydrated. I hydrated him. He didn’t fight having a syringe forced down his throat. Flat.
Saturday night we curled up and watched War Inc., John Cusack does not approve of the Iraq war and he hates Dick Cheney and Haliburton. A lot. I also finished up Woof, a book of essays about peoples love for their dogs. Mostly their dead dogs. Looking back I probably should have stuck to my double issue of Entertainment Weekly. Sunday he was not improved but he was a little annoyed by the involuntary hydration program I had instituted. Monday I called the vet and $216 later we knew his bladder was full while his bowels were empty. I was shocked since he hadn’t eaten in DAYS and I had been forcing water down his throat. The vet took $140 worth of blood and will let me know Tuesday why The Kitty is flat.
Monday, December 29, 2008
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Sick Kitty
I hope your holidays were as great as mine! Did you all get neat stuff? I did! Did you shop the day after? I did! Did ya'll save a lot of money? I did!
The only sour note would be that The Kitty seems to be having another health crises. He has one year, unusually while we are a fifteen-hundred miles from his vet. This year he must have decided that since we had access to a good vet in Marquette, he would chose to up the stress factor by side-stepping vacation and going instead with The Holidays as his target crisis time. He's so special. (He is, he really is! Best. Cat. Ever. He's my baby.)
He had been having his trademark lower GI problem but then that symptom went away and he started to vomit. A lot. He had been stable for a few days but all of a sudden he isn't eating or drinking and he's listless and seems really weak. The not drinking is a real worry and I've been shooting water down his throat with a syringe since Saturday night, the first few times I did that he was so weak that he didn't even complain. He's complaining a little now. Yay.
Monday morning we are making a visit to our vet to get this sorted out. Please think happy, healthy, easily treatable thoughts for my baby kitty.
I hope your holidays were as great as mine! Did you all get neat stuff? I did! Did you shop the day after? I did! Did ya'll save a lot of money? I did!
The only sour note would be that The Kitty seems to be having another health crises. He has one year, unusually while we are a fifteen-hundred miles from his vet. This year he must have decided that since we had access to a good vet in Marquette, he would chose to up the stress factor by side-stepping vacation and going instead with The Holidays as his target crisis time. He's so special. (He is, he really is! Best. Cat. Ever. He's my baby.)
He had been having his trademark lower GI problem but then that symptom went away and he started to vomit. A lot. He had been stable for a few days but all of a sudden he isn't eating or drinking and he's listless and seems really weak. The not drinking is a real worry and I've been shooting water down his throat with a syringe since Saturday night, the first few times I did that he was so weak that he didn't even complain. He's complaining a little now. Yay.
Monday morning we are making a visit to our vet to get this sorted out. Please think happy, healthy, easily treatable thoughts for my baby kitty.
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Friday, December 26, 2008
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Cooking
I made more dog cookies. I wasn't going to make more cookies until, oh, Spring? but I went into Doggers cookie tin and came up empty. I entertained the thought of going and buying her more cookies, maybe some fancy ones with carob, but to get those mythical fancy carob cookies I would have to go outside and it's really cold and I didn't want to go out in the cold more than I didn't want to make more cookies.
Poor Dogger. She didn't have any cookies and here I still had flour and bacon and all the while I was debating going out and buying store bought cookies! I felt bad. I had made home made cookies for just about every dog I know and my dog was looking down bag-o-store-bought-cookies If everyone else gets home made cookies, why should my dog settle for store bought? Also, the Kitchen Aid was scheduled to go back to its house. Tonight, however was still in my house... I decided it would be easier to clean the mixer a second time and make the cookies myself than to go out in the cold to buy some strangers cookies.
In honor of Christmas, a Christmas quiz
I made more dog cookies. I wasn't going to make more cookies until, oh, Spring? but I went into Doggers cookie tin and came up empty. I entertained the thought of going and buying her more cookies, maybe some fancy ones with carob, but to get those mythical fancy carob cookies I would have to go outside and it's really cold and I didn't want to go out in the cold more than I didn't want to make more cookies.
Poor Dogger. She didn't have any cookies and here I still had flour and bacon and all the while I was debating going out and buying store bought cookies! I felt bad. I had made home made cookies for just about every dog I know and my dog was looking down bag-o-store-bought-cookies If everyone else gets home made cookies, why should my dog settle for store bought? Also, the Kitchen Aid was scheduled to go back to its house. Tonight, however was still in my house... I decided it would be easier to clean the mixer a second time and make the cookies myself than to go out in the cold to buy some strangers cookies.
In honor of Christmas, a Christmas quiz
Monday, December 22, 2008
Christmas Carols, in Latin and the one in German, for you.
Because if I have to hear The Christmas Shoes one more time, that welps Mama ain't the only one "...gonna meet Jesus"
1. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Alles schläft; einsam wacht
Nur das traute heilige Paar.
Holder Knab' im lockigten Haar,
: Schlafe in himmlischer Ruh! :
2. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Gottes Sohn, o wie lacht
Lieb' aus deinem göttlichen Mund,
Da uns schlägt die rettende Stund'.
: Jesus in deiner Geburt! :
3. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Die der Welt Heil gebracht,
Aus des Himmels goldenen Höhn,
Uns der Gnaden Fülle läßt sehn,
: Jesum in Menschengestalt! :
4. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Wo sich heut alle Macht
Väterlicher Liebe ergoß,
Und als Bruder huldvoll umschloß
Jesus die Völker der Welt! :
5. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Lange schon uns bedacht,
Als der Herr vom Grimme befreit
In der Väter urgrauer Zeit
: Aller Welt Schonung verhieß! :
6. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Hirten erst kundgemacht
Durch der Engel Alleluja,
Tönt es laut bei Ferne und Nah:
"Jesus der Retter ist da!"
AQUAFOLIA ORNATIS Deck the Halls (Translated by Stanford Miller)
Aquafolia ornatis Fa la la la la, la la la la Tempus hoc hilaritatis Fa la la la la, la la la la Vestes claras induamus; Fa la la la la, la la la la Cantilenas nunc promamus Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Jingle Bells:
Nives, glacies, nos, pueritia! Risus decet, nunc decent carmina! Laetos iuvat nos ire per agros! Traha fert velociter, et cachinemus nos!
CHORUS: Tinniat, tinniat tintinnabulum1 Labimur in glacie post mulum curtum! Tinniat, tinniat tintinnabulum! Me nuper miserum temptavit lunae lux!
Mox assidebat mihi puella facti dux! Vecti subito in nivis cumulos -- Caballus est perterritus et tunc eversi nos!
CHORUS. Solum scintillat, nive candidum, Repetatur nunc concentus carminum! Canities absit morosa omnibus! Puellulas cum pueris delectat hic cursus. CHORUS.
Because if I have to hear The Christmas Shoes one more time, that welps Mama ain't the only one "...gonna meet Jesus"
1. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Alles schläft; einsam wacht
Nur das traute heilige Paar.
Holder Knab' im lockigten Haar,
: Schlafe in himmlischer Ruh! :
2. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Gottes Sohn, o wie lacht
Lieb' aus deinem göttlichen Mund,
Da uns schlägt die rettende Stund'.
: Jesus in deiner Geburt! :
3. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Die der Welt Heil gebracht,
Aus des Himmels goldenen Höhn,
Uns der Gnaden Fülle läßt sehn,
: Jesum in Menschengestalt! :
4. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Wo sich heut alle Macht
Väterlicher Liebe ergoß,
Und als Bruder huldvoll umschloß
Jesus die Völker der Welt! :
5. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Lange schon uns bedacht,
Als der Herr vom Grimme befreit
In der Väter urgrauer Zeit
: Aller Welt Schonung verhieß! :
6. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Hirten erst kundgemacht
Durch der Engel Alleluja,
Tönt es laut bei Ferne und Nah:
"Jesus der Retter ist da!"
AQUAFOLIA ORNATIS Deck the Halls (Translated by Stanford Miller)
Aquafolia ornatis Fa la la la la, la la la la Tempus hoc hilaritatis Fa la la la la, la la la la Vestes claras induamus; Fa la la la la, la la la la Cantilenas nunc promamus Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Jingle Bells:
Nives, glacies, nos, pueritia! Risus decet, nunc decent carmina! Laetos iuvat nos ire per agros! Traha fert velociter, et cachinemus nos!
CHORUS: Tinniat, tinniat tintinnabulum1 Labimur in glacie post mulum curtum! Tinniat, tinniat tintinnabulum! Me nuper miserum temptavit lunae lux!
Mox assidebat mihi puella facti dux! Vecti subito in nivis cumulos -- Caballus est perterritus et tunc eversi nos!
CHORUS. Solum scintillat, nive candidum, Repetatur nunc concentus carminum! Canities absit morosa omnibus! Puellulas cum pueris delectat hic cursus. CHORUS.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Friday, December 19, 2008
TGIF
In honor of having no more shopping, cooking, wrapping, decorating, addressing, stamping, sealing and mailing to do. Ever. Until next November... I took Thursday night off; Except to post this link about Burger Kings newest product Burger King scented cologne . For real.
Hopefully, this will bring down the rate of teen pregnancy. There's nothing like the odor of old grease and undiluted bleach to really turn a girl off. Perhaps it will help young, inexperienced girls learn how to tell the wrong guys from the right guys just by scent. Hopefully fewer teen girls will end up giving birth in Burger King toilet stalls.
Oh and to post this The Throw a shoe at Bush Game .
In honor of having no more shopping, cooking, wrapping, decorating, addressing, stamping, sealing and mailing to do. Ever. Until next November... I took Thursday night off; Except to post this link about Burger Kings newest product Burger King scented cologne . For real.
Hopefully, this will bring down the rate of teen pregnancy. There's nothing like the odor of old grease and undiluted bleach to really turn a girl off. Perhaps it will help young, inexperienced girls learn how to tell the wrong guys from the right guys just by scent. Hopefully fewer teen girls will end up giving birth in Burger King toilet stalls.
Oh and to post this The Throw a shoe at Bush Game .
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Wrap Star
I decided it was time to wrap gifts. I had all ready done the monster portion with the wrapping of Tiny E's gifts so it would have appeared that I wouldn't have that much more to do.
Appearances can be deceiving.
First were the gifts to the people at work. I had planned ahead and had little gift bags at the ready to hold my little gifts. This took longer than I had expected because I also had to take care of cards at the same time. I still have to take care of a few other people in the building but the gift wrapping portion of the evening for people at work was over. Yay.
Feeling pretty awesome after getting though that group, I decided that I would wrap the gifts of a family member. I hate wrapping. Really. I hate it. I'm not very good at it and it takes a great deal of effort to make a package I've wrapped look attractive like the fake gifts wrapped under the trees in the displays at the mall . It's hard to make a package I've wrapped look likeit was wrapped like an adult or someone with arms. To be honest, it' s hard just to cover up the package, it's not going to be attractive. One year I found a charity that was wrapping gifts and that year everyone knew I had let someone else wrap the gifts for me. My packages looked like they were wrapped by someone with two usable arms and some muscle control.
This year I didn't have that luxury.
My plan was that I would wrap Family Member #1 gifts and then I would do something else, like pay attention to my pets or watch TV. After pet attention and TV, I would wrap my Giftee's gifts and and then tackle Family Member #2 gifts the next night and go on from there with Family Member 3, 4 and etcetera. It would be time consuming and drag the whole process out but I also wouldn't be as likely to end up in a rocking back and forth under the dining room table trying to treat my countless paper cuts with adhesive gift tags. Happily, it didn't end that badly! I got Giftee and FM#1 taken care of and then moved on to FM#2.
I had my fab new bows and rolls of tape and paper and I was on a role.
I went out and bought special new paper so that I wouldn't have to face my last years paper which was also the year befores paper and some of it dated prior to even that. I had begun to hate my Christmas paper and blame it for not just going out and taking the initiative and wrapping the gifts on their own. What were they waiting for my permission? They weren't new here, they had a good idea how to accomplish the task. Lazy. I also think that giving human qualities to wrapping paper is wrong. No gift paper is so necessary to the plot that it has to be saved year after year. No gift paper is so cute that it should be bought in 300 foot rolls either. Think Ahead! Is the Peanuts and Pooh papers going to still make me smile next year? Most likely but maybe not. Maybe I should have bought them in smaller rolls, maybe next year it will be all about fairies and pirates. The market in wrapping paper futures must be a very volatile one.
When I was wrapping Tiny E's gifts days ago, my project was to wrap each gift in a different paper. I liked this, I mean, I would also like to wrap everything in the same paper and have some sort of decorating scheme when it comes to wrapping but I never do. I think it would be kind of Martha Stewart to have all the packages under the tree be in the same color pallet, I associate that kind of thought as being very grown up. If were a grown up I would not have ended up with Pooh Bear and Peanuts paper.
Speaking of new paper and color schemes. I bought new bows as part of my plan to make gift wrapping an enjoyable experience. I bought the paper at Wallyworld and the bows at Poverty Barn. Big Mistake! The paper was New for 2008 and the bows corresponded to the "old" colors of 2007, that is the only way to explain why my bows were lime green or turquoise or brown and my paper was a slightly less saturated lime and not-at-all-turquoise with only a hint of brown. Who decided that lime green and turquoise and brown were Christmas colors? And even worse, because I bought my paper at Wallyworld the colors are more Red/White/Blue than Red/White/Green. I mean, Snoopy and Pooh aren't carrying flags or killing terrists but both would be appropriate for sale at the PX. I hadn't noticed because I was blinded by the glare of of Charlie Browns bald head.
But. I got the gifts done. All of them.
I think the real reason I put off wrapping, is that once the gifts are wrapped it means to me that everything is over. All the effort and energy and time devoted to Christmas is almost over. It's also about the passing of time and getting older and everything too. I haven't been as good at doing my Advent calender on a daily basis either because I'm not happy with how fast time is moving.
I decided it was time to wrap gifts. I had all ready done the monster portion with the wrapping of Tiny E's gifts so it would have appeared that I wouldn't have that much more to do.
Appearances can be deceiving.
First were the gifts to the people at work. I had planned ahead and had little gift bags at the ready to hold my little gifts. This took longer than I had expected because I also had to take care of cards at the same time. I still have to take care of a few other people in the building but the gift wrapping portion of the evening for people at work was over. Yay.
Feeling pretty awesome after getting though that group, I decided that I would wrap the gifts of a family member. I hate wrapping. Really. I hate it. I'm not very good at it and it takes a great deal of effort to make a package I've wrapped look attractive like the fake gifts wrapped under the trees in the displays at the mall . It's hard to make a package I've wrapped look likeit was wrapped like an adult or someone with arms. To be honest, it' s hard just to cover up the package, it's not going to be attractive. One year I found a charity that was wrapping gifts and that year everyone knew I had let someone else wrap the gifts for me. My packages looked like they were wrapped by someone with two usable arms and some muscle control.
This year I didn't have that luxury.
My plan was that I would wrap Family Member #1 gifts and then I would do something else, like pay attention to my pets or watch TV. After pet attention and TV, I would wrap my Giftee's gifts and and then tackle Family Member #2 gifts the next night and go on from there with Family Member 3, 4 and etcetera. It would be time consuming and drag the whole process out but I also wouldn't be as likely to end up in a rocking back and forth under the dining room table trying to treat my countless paper cuts with adhesive gift tags. Happily, it didn't end that badly! I got Giftee and FM#1 taken care of and then moved on to FM#2.
I had my fab new bows and rolls of tape and paper and I was on a role.
I went out and bought special new paper so that I wouldn't have to face my last years paper which was also the year befores paper and some of it dated prior to even that. I had begun to hate my Christmas paper and blame it for not just going out and taking the initiative and wrapping the gifts on their own. What were they waiting for my permission? They weren't new here, they had a good idea how to accomplish the task. Lazy. I also think that giving human qualities to wrapping paper is wrong. No gift paper is so necessary to the plot that it has to be saved year after year. No gift paper is so cute that it should be bought in 300 foot rolls either. Think Ahead! Is the Peanuts and Pooh papers going to still make me smile next year? Most likely but maybe not. Maybe I should have bought them in smaller rolls, maybe next year it will be all about fairies and pirates. The market in wrapping paper futures must be a very volatile one.
When I was wrapping Tiny E's gifts days ago, my project was to wrap each gift in a different paper. I liked this, I mean, I would also like to wrap everything in the same paper and have some sort of decorating scheme when it comes to wrapping but I never do. I think it would be kind of Martha Stewart to have all the packages under the tree be in the same color pallet, I associate that kind of thought as being very grown up. If were a grown up I would not have ended up with Pooh Bear and Peanuts paper.
Speaking of new paper and color schemes. I bought new bows as part of my plan to make gift wrapping an enjoyable experience. I bought the paper at Wallyworld and the bows at Poverty Barn. Big Mistake! The paper was New for 2008 and the bows corresponded to the "old" colors of 2007, that is the only way to explain why my bows were lime green or turquoise or brown and my paper was a slightly less saturated lime and not-at-all-turquoise with only a hint of brown. Who decided that lime green and turquoise and brown were Christmas colors? And even worse, because I bought my paper at Wallyworld the colors are more Red/White/Blue than Red/White/Green. I mean, Snoopy and Pooh aren't carrying flags or killing terrists but both would be appropriate for sale at the PX. I hadn't noticed because I was blinded by the glare of of Charlie Browns bald head.
But. I got the gifts done. All of them.
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Cooking
All the dog cookies are now gone. Slow boats to across town, Michigan, Texas, Florida and Pennsylvania. Hopefully the boats will dock sometime before Christmas. The post office suggested that if I were to pay for first class passage that they might arrive before New Years but since I opted for steerage they couldn't make any promises. They did however make it clear that the US Postal Service thought that I was a cheap cow who clearly didn't care about the people she was shipping things to; I could have pointed out that for the $28 they wanted me to pay to send just one of my small, light weight boxes to its destination, one way over night on a truck, that I could fly my not small not light weight self one way almost anywhere Southwest Airlines flies and I would still beat the cookies to the finish line... but I chose to not go there. And the "people" I was sending the boxes to were dogs who are fully liberated from calenders and other abertrary constraints and Phhhht anyway and staleness only improves dog cookies.
Oh, and for those wondering about the saga of Cookbook Search for my Giftee : She's loving them! She gets all excited about them, especially the older books because she's all about antiques and today when she opened her gifts said Wow. Someone really knows me. I didn't think anyone here really knew me... I was standing there trying not to get all weepy from the sweetness of it and give myself away. In reality I didn't think about her love of antiques, I was just looking for cookbooks that might have recipes with funny ingredients like lard or brain or more than one egg.
Speaking of old, weird recipes. I have my own veryold cookbook and I was flipping through it today and I ran across a recipe for Mashed Potato Cake.
1 1/2 cups flour
1 cup sweet butter, creamed well
1/2 cup mashed potatoes
1 cup chopped walnuts
1/2 square melted chocolate
2 teaspoons baking powder sifted with 2 cups of floor
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon cloves
1 teaspoon nutmeg
4 eggs beaten lightly
No further explanation of what you do with all this and no directions as to temperature of oven or how long to bake it, but I would imagine it would be until you could stomach eating chocolate flavored potatoes.
If you would like a sandwich, try a Dried Beef
For a dozen sandwiches soak a half a pound of dried beef in cold water for half an hour; then take out and press out all the water. Roll in flour and fry in butter, place between thin slices of butter bread. Wrap in oiled paper.
Have any curiosity about what goes into Thousand Island dressing? Wonder no more
Thousand and One Island Dressing
First Part
1 Tablespoon flour
2 Tablespoons sugar
1 Tablespoon salt
3 Tablespoons olive oil or butter
1/4 teaspoon dry mustard
4 tablespoons vinegar
2 tablespoons water
1 egg
Second Part
6 mushrooms
1/2 cooked beet
12 green olives
1 canned pimento
1 or 2 teaspoons of chives or onions
1.3 green sweet pickle
1 hard boiled egg
dash of pepper
1/2 pint heavy cream
Mix chopped mixture with cooked dressing, add cayenne pepper. Then add cream and hard boiled egg riced.
If you are more of an oil-and-vinegar person
1 cup vinegar
1 tablespoon each of flour and butter
salt and pepper
1 egg
Cook in double boiler
Want the recipe for "ideal" salad dressing?
1 egg
4 pounds vinegar (yes , see page 77 The New Home Cookbook, 1926)
1 pound flour (ibid!)
1 pound sugar
1 tablespoon salt
1/2 cup thick cream
1 tablespoon dry mustard
1 tablespoon paprika
2 tablespoons pepper
1 onion the size of a walnut
1 pimento
8 ripe olives
Apparently in 1926 as an average homemaker had very strange ideals and knew what to do next with six plus pounds of goop in her kitchen and didn't need any further directions. If I found this mess in my kitchen I would invest in a slip and slide and sell the whole lot on Craigs list to the first group of consenting adults that would have it, but I doubt Mrs. Homemaker 1926 would have found that "ideal".
All the dog cookies are now gone. Slow boats to across town, Michigan, Texas, Florida and Pennsylvania. Hopefully the boats will dock sometime before Christmas. The post office suggested that if I were to pay for first class passage that they might arrive before New Years but since I opted for steerage they couldn't make any promises. They did however make it clear that the US Postal Service thought that I was a cheap cow who clearly didn't care about the people she was shipping things to; I could have pointed out that for the $28 they wanted me to pay to send just one of my small, light weight boxes to its destination, one way over night on a truck, that I could fly my not small not light weight self one way almost anywhere Southwest Airlines flies and I would still beat the cookies to the finish line... but I chose to not go there. And the "people" I was sending the boxes to were dogs who are fully liberated from calenders and other abertrary constraints and Phhhht anyway and staleness only improves dog cookies.
Oh, and for those wondering about the saga of Cookbook Search for my Giftee : She's loving them! She gets all excited about them, especially the older books because she's all about antiques and today when she opened her gifts said Wow. Someone really knows me. I didn't think anyone here really knew me... I was standing there trying not to get all weepy from the sweetness of it and give myself away. In reality I didn't think about her love of antiques, I was just looking for cookbooks that might have recipes with funny ingredients like lard or brain or more than one egg.
Speaking of old, weird recipes. I have my own veryold cookbook and I was flipping through it today and I ran across a recipe for Mashed Potato Cake.
1 1/2 cups flour
1 cup sweet butter, creamed well
1/2 cup mashed potatoes
1 cup chopped walnuts
1/2 square melted chocolate
2 teaspoons baking powder sifted with 2 cups of floor
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon cloves
1 teaspoon nutmeg
4 eggs beaten lightly
No further explanation of what you do with all this and no directions as to temperature of oven or how long to bake it, but I would imagine it would be until you could stomach eating chocolate flavored potatoes.
If you would like a sandwich, try a Dried Beef
For a dozen sandwiches soak a half a pound of dried beef in cold water for half an hour; then take out and press out all the water. Roll in flour and fry in butter, place between thin slices of butter bread. Wrap in oiled paper.
Have any curiosity about what goes into Thousand Island dressing? Wonder no more
Thousand and One Island Dressing
First Part
1 Tablespoon flour
2 Tablespoons sugar
1 Tablespoon salt
3 Tablespoons olive oil or butter
1/4 teaspoon dry mustard
4 tablespoons vinegar
2 tablespoons water
1 egg
Second Part
6 mushrooms
1/2 cooked beet
12 green olives
1 canned pimento
1 or 2 teaspoons of chives or onions
1.3 green sweet pickle
1 hard boiled egg
dash of pepper
1/2 pint heavy cream
Mix chopped mixture with cooked dressing, add cayenne pepper. Then add cream and hard boiled egg riced.
If you are more of an oil-and-vinegar person
1 cup vinegar
1 tablespoon each of flour and butter
salt and pepper
1 egg
Cook in double boiler
Want the recipe for "ideal" salad dressing?
1 egg
4 pounds vinegar (yes , see page 77 The New Home Cookbook, 1926)
1 pound flour (ibid!)
1 pound sugar
1 tablespoon salt
1/2 cup thick cream
1 tablespoon dry mustard
1 tablespoon paprika
2 tablespoons pepper
1 onion the size of a walnut
1 pimento
8 ripe olives
Apparently in 1926 as an average homemaker had very strange ideals and knew what to do next with six plus pounds of goop in her kitchen and didn't need any further directions. If I found this mess in my kitchen I would invest in a slip and slide and sell the whole lot on Craigs list to the first group of consenting adults that would have it, but I doubt Mrs. Homemaker 1926 would have found that "ideal".
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
You know there is a two-year-old in your life when...
Have you ever tried to wrap an elephant? It’s not at all as easy as boxing up a monkey. That? That was easy, I shared my thoughts with him, he agreed and I popped the little guy in the box then patted his head and taped the box up and it was a wrap. Monkey is happy, I’m happy and I didn’t even waste any paper - which for me is practically a miracle as I can waste paper mailing cards. Win-win-win.
Use gift bags! I hear you saying Save time and paper! Bags make it easy! No muss no fuss no waste! Okay, are you two? When you were two would you have been satisfied by unbagging your gifts? No., No you would not.Bags would have made you sad.
I do not want my two-year-old niece to be sad. So I had to figure out how to wrap an elephant. First I tried to box it up, like the monkey. That was easy, win-win-win! I thought so I assumed that Mr. Elephant would also obediently curl up. Elephants are co-operative aren’t they? Elephants live to serve, right?. No, no they aren’t and they don’t. In reality they are willful, uncooperative, obstinate and quite passive aggressive to be honest. First I pulled too much paper off the roll, then not enough. The box would not be wrapped. I tried it on every possible angle. My problem remained the same, no mater how I positioned the box I had either too much or too little paper. I then said Okay. I won’t wrap the whole box. I’ll slip cover the box! Eureka!. It soon became evident that I am not an upholsterer.
!@#$%^&*((!! We started out on the wrong foot. I decided to shake it off and try again. I freed Mr. Elephant from his box. We both took a deep breath and we sat down to try to come to a solution we could both work with. First, we decided we would forgo our attorneys and work it out elephant-o- A- woman-o.
Regardless, Mr. Elephant speaking through his legal team expressed some concerns when I balled up the used paper and disposed of it. He felt I was using it to express feelings of dissatisfaction with him. I assured him through my legal representatives the timing of the disposal, while unthinking on my part was not in any way an expression of any dissatisfaction with him or his contribution thus far.
We had some coffee, talked about our families and shared individual holiday memories - True fact, elephants don’t really have a great memory. Mr. Elephant shared a humorous story regarding his Mother and a misplaced fruitcake that had us both rolling! But it wasn’t all small talk. We had work to do and an agenda to stick to. We didn’t always agree. I felt that a tidy box approach would be the best, while Mr. Elephant brought forth the suggestion that he may need some sort of custom box solution. I countered with the idea that we might just be able to get by with a festive bow.
Negotiations broke down at this point. After some heated words and some last minute interventions from our attorneys, we came to a solution.
Have you ever tried to wrap an elephant? It’s not at all as easy as boxing up a monkey. That? That was easy, I shared my thoughts with him, he agreed and I popped the little guy in the box then patted his head and taped the box up and it was a wrap. Monkey is happy, I’m happy and I didn’t even waste any paper - which for me is practically a miracle as I can waste paper mailing cards. Win-win-win.
Use gift bags! I hear you saying Save time and paper! Bags make it easy! No muss no fuss no waste! Okay, are you two? When you were two would you have been satisfied by unbagging your gifts? No., No you would not.Bags would have made you sad.
I do not want my two-year-old niece to be sad. So I had to figure out how to wrap an elephant. First I tried to box it up, like the monkey. That was easy, win-win-win! I thought so I assumed that Mr. Elephant would also obediently curl up. Elephants are co-operative aren’t they? Elephants live to serve, right?. No, no they aren’t and they don’t. In reality they are willful, uncooperative, obstinate and quite passive aggressive to be honest. First I pulled too much paper off the roll, then not enough. The box would not be wrapped. I tried it on every possible angle. My problem remained the same, no mater how I positioned the box I had either too much or too little paper. I then said Okay. I won’t wrap the whole box. I’ll slip cover the box! Eureka!. It soon became evident that I am not an upholsterer.
!@#$%^&*((!! We started out on the wrong foot. I decided to shake it off and try again. I freed Mr. Elephant from his box. We both took a deep breath and we sat down to try to come to a solution we could both work with. First, we decided we would forgo our attorneys and work it out elephant-o- A- woman-o.
Regardless, Mr. Elephant speaking through his legal team expressed some concerns when I balled up the used paper and disposed of it. He felt I was using it to express feelings of dissatisfaction with him. I assured him through my legal representatives the timing of the disposal, while unthinking on my part was not in any way an expression of any dissatisfaction with him or his contribution thus far.
We had some coffee, talked about our families and shared individual holiday memories - True fact, elephants don’t really have a great memory. Mr. Elephant shared a humorous story regarding his Mother and a misplaced fruitcake that had us both rolling! But it wasn’t all small talk. We had work to do and an agenda to stick to. We didn’t always agree. I felt that a tidy box approach would be the best, while Mr. Elephant brought forth the suggestion that he may need some sort of custom box solution. I countered with the idea that we might just be able to get by with a festive bow.
Negotiations broke down at this point. After some heated words and some last minute interventions from our attorneys, we came to a solution.
Monday, December 15, 2008
Cookie Crumbs
The cookies are done and more importantly, I am done with the cookies. The final count was 981 cookies in bacon/cheese, peanut butter, milk and bacon. I was going to stick with just bacon/cheese but then I got very tired of bacon/cheese and needed to change it up. Also? my house was being to reek of bacon and cheese, which you would think wouldn't be a bad thing, I mean who doesn't like the smell of bacon? Live with it non-stop for a few days and then get back to me.
So then I made the peanut butter which made me feel bad because Dogger can't have peanut butter ( bad, bad, evil potassium does not work for Addisonian doggies) so I then had to make the milk batch because Dogger can have milk and then I ran out of cheese so I made the just bacon batch. I made small bones and large bones and teeny bones and two different sizes of stars and if I could have found a small enough Santa I would have made Santa's in small, medium and teeny too.
The cookies are done and more importantly, I am done with the cookies. The final count was 981 cookies in bacon/cheese, peanut butter, milk and bacon. I was going to stick with just bacon/cheese but then I got very tired of bacon/cheese and needed to change it up. Also? my house was being to reek of bacon and cheese, which you would think wouldn't be a bad thing, I mean who doesn't like the smell of bacon? Live with it non-stop for a few days and then get back to me.
So then I made the peanut butter which made me feel bad because Dogger can't have peanut butter ( bad, bad, evil potassium does not work for Addisonian doggies) so I then had to make the milk batch because Dogger can have milk and then I ran out of cheese so I made the just bacon batch. I made small bones and large bones and teeny bones and two different sizes of stars and if I could have found a small enough Santa I would have made Santa's in small, medium and teeny too.
That's what almost a thousand dog treats look like. Then it was time for gift bagging and over thinking. I had thirteen names on my list and dogs of various sizes. This year I wanted to make small cookies for the small dogs, so I made small cookies in all but the milk flavored, I so I could add a layer of pain-in-my-ass later on. Differentiating between the two sizes didn't seem like it was going to be as complicated as it turned out to be. I thought I made it easy for myself but it just added a second additional layer of pain-in-my-ass. And this year I didn't even stress myself about the individual cookie counts per bag and making sure they were all the same. I mean, I made sure every bag got sameish number of cookies, I just didn't stress too much on how much of each variety each bag ended up. In the past I've spent a lot of time dumping out bags and counting and all but weighing bags to make sure they were all identical. Having two different sets of cookies put an end to that. I chose not to worry on how many big cookies verses how many small cookies and all that attendant bother, i.e Oh no! This bag has fourteen bacon cookies while this other bag has thirteen! Oh No! the same bag has six large milk stars and it's only supposed to have five! Now I have to start all over!. Everyone ended up with a nice bag of cookies. End of story.
I wasn't finished. Some of the cookies need to be shipped and they won't let you ship plastic bags! Imagine! My plastic bags kind of suck too, so I don't blame them. I've had two burst because they suck, they are cute, cute, cure but not made to stand the test of time. So, more stress, more time at Wallyworld and another layer of pain-in-my-ass. The thing is? I actually enjoy all this work because people seem to like the cookies and I know their dogs do and its a gift they can use. Tomorrow I'm taking the folks at work their cookies so all of them will be out of my life by Tuesday at lunch at the latest. Then I can turn my attention to taking care of the humans on my list.
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Friday, December 12, 2008
Happy Friday
Lets see, Thursday night I made even more cookies, peanut butter this time plus a dough ball of milk flavored on deck for Friday. I took a nice shower and I went upstairs where I was trying to decide which holiday shirt to wear to work when I stepped in something I hoped was cat barf.
It wasn't.
Lets see, Thursday night I made even more cookies, peanut butter this time plus a dough ball of milk flavored on deck for Friday. I took a nice shower and I went upstairs where I was trying to decide which holiday shirt to wear to work when I stepped in something I hoped was cat barf.
It wasn't.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
2008 Golden Globe Nominations
Best Picture, Drama
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
"Frost/Nixon"
"The Reader"
"Revolutionary Road"
"Slumdog Millionaire"
Best Picture, Musical or Comedy
"Burn After Reading"
"Happy-Go-Lucky"
"In Bruges"
"Mamma Mia!"
"Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
Best Actor, Drama
Leonardo DiCaprio, "Revolutionary Road"
Frank Langella, "Frost/Nixon"
Sean Penn, "Milk"
Brad Pitt, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
Mickey Rourke, "The Wrestler"
Best Actress, Drama
Anne Hathaway, "Rachel Getting Married"
Angelina Jolie, "Changeling"
Meryl Streep, "Doubt"
Kristin Scott Thomas, "I've Loved You So Long"
Kate Winslett, "Revolutionary Road"
Best Actor, Musical or Comedy
Javier Bardem, "Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
Colin Farrell, "In Bruges"
James Franco, "Pineapple Express"
Brendan Gleeson, "In Bruges"
Dustin Hoffman, "Last Chance Harvey"
Best Actress, Musical or Comedy
Rebecca Hall, "Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
Sally Hawkins, "Happy-Go-Lucky"
Frances McDormand, "Burn After Reading"
Meryl Streep, "Mamma Mia!"
Emma Thompson, "Last Chance Harvey"
Best Supporting Actor
Tom Cruise, "Tropic Thunder"
Robert Downey Jr., "Tropic Thunder"
Ralph Fiennes, "The Duchess"
Philip Seymour Hoffman, "Doubt"
Heather Ledger, "The Dark Knight"
Best Supporting Actress
Amy Adams, "Doubt"
Penelope Cruz, "Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
Viola Davis, "Doubt"
Marissa Tomei, "The Wrestler"
Kate Winslet, "The Reader"
Best Director
Danny Boyle, "Slumdog Millionaire"
Stephen Daldry, "The Reader"
David Fincher, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
Ron Howard, "Frost/Nixon"
Sam Mendes, "Revolutionary Road"
Best Screenplay
Simon Beaufoy, "Slumdog Millionaire"
David Hare, "The Reader"
Peter Morgan, "Frost/Nixon"
Eric Roth, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
John Patrick Shanley, "Doubt"
Best Original Song
"Down To Earth," "Wall-E"
"Gran Torino," "Gran Torino"
"I Thought I Lost You, "Bolt"
"Once in a Lifetime," "Cadillac Records"
"The Wrestler," "The Wrestler"
Best Original Score
Alexandre Desplat, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
Clint Eastwood, "Changeling"
James Newton Howard, "Defiance"
A.R. Rahman, "Slumdog Millionaire"
Hans Zimmer, "Frost/Nixon"
Best Animated Film
"Bolt"
"Kung Fu Panda"
"Wall-E"
Best Foreign Language Film
"The Baader Meinhof Complex"
"Everlasting Moments"
"Gomorrah"
"I've Loved You So Long"
"Waltz with Bashir"
Best TV Series, Drama
"Dexter"
"House"
"In Treatment"
"Mad Men"
"True Blood"
Best TV Series, Comedy
"30 Rock"
"Californication"
"Entourage"
"The Office"
"Weeds"
Best Miniseries or Movie
"A Raisin in the Sun"
"Bernard and Doris"
"Cranford"
"John Adams"
"Recount"
Best Actor, Drama Series
Gabriel Byrne, "In Treatment"
Michael C. Hall, "Dexter"
Jon Hamm, "Mad Men"
Hugh Laurie, "House"
Jonathan Rhys Meyers, "The Tudors"
Best Actress, Drama Series
Sally Field, "Brothers & Sisters"
Mariska Hargitay, "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit"
January Jones, "Mad Men"
Anna Paquin, "True Blood"
Kyra Sedgwick, "The Closer"
Best Actor, Comedy Series
Alec Baldwin, "30 Rock"
Steve Carrell, "The Office"
Kevin Connolly, "Entourage"
David Duchovny, "Californication"
Tony Shalhoub, "Monk"
Best Actress, Comedy Series
Christina Applegate, "Samantha Who?"
America Ferrerra, "Ugly Betty"
Tina Fey, "30 Rock"
Debra Messing, "The Starter Wife"
Mary-Louise Parker, "Weeds"
Best Actor, Miniseries or Movie
Ralph Fiennes, "Bernard & Doris"
Paul Giamatti, "Kevin Adams"
Kevin Spacey, "Recount"
Kiefer Sutherland, "24: Redemption"
Tom Wilkinson, "Recount"
Best Actress, Miniseries or Movie
Judi Dench, "Cranford"
Catherine Keener, "An American Crime"
Laura Linney, "John Adams"
Shirley Maclaine, "Coco Chanel"
Susan Sarandon, "Bernard and Doris"
Best Supporting Actor, Series, Miniseries or Movie
Neil Patrick Harris, "How I Met Your Mother"
Denis Leary, "Recount"
Jeremy Piven, "Entourage"
Blair Underwood, "In Treatment"
Tom Wilkinson, "John Adams"
Best Supporting Actress, Series, Miniseries or Movie
Eileen Atkins, "Cranford"
Laura Dern, "Recount"
Melissa George, "In Treatment"
Rachel Griffiths, "Brothers & Sisters"
Dianne Weist, "In Treatment"
Best Picture, Drama
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
"Frost/Nixon"
"The Reader"
"Revolutionary Road"
"Slumdog Millionaire"
Best Picture, Musical or Comedy
"Burn After Reading"
"Happy-Go-Lucky"
"In Bruges"
"Mamma Mia!"
"Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
Best Actor, Drama
Leonardo DiCaprio, "Revolutionary Road"
Frank Langella, "Frost/Nixon"
Sean Penn, "Milk"
Brad Pitt, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
Mickey Rourke, "The Wrestler"
Best Actress, Drama
Anne Hathaway, "Rachel Getting Married"
Angelina Jolie, "Changeling"
Meryl Streep, "Doubt"
Kristin Scott Thomas, "I've Loved You So Long"
Kate Winslett, "Revolutionary Road"
Best Actor, Musical or Comedy
Javier Bardem, "Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
Colin Farrell, "In Bruges"
James Franco, "Pineapple Express"
Brendan Gleeson, "In Bruges"
Dustin Hoffman, "Last Chance Harvey"
Best Actress, Musical or Comedy
Rebecca Hall, "Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
Sally Hawkins, "Happy-Go-Lucky"
Frances McDormand, "Burn After Reading"
Meryl Streep, "Mamma Mia!"
Emma Thompson, "Last Chance Harvey"
Best Supporting Actor
Tom Cruise, "Tropic Thunder"
Robert Downey Jr., "Tropic Thunder"
Ralph Fiennes, "The Duchess"
Philip Seymour Hoffman, "Doubt"
Heather Ledger, "The Dark Knight"
Best Supporting Actress
Amy Adams, "Doubt"
Penelope Cruz, "Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
Viola Davis, "Doubt"
Marissa Tomei, "The Wrestler"
Kate Winslet, "The Reader"
Best Director
Danny Boyle, "Slumdog Millionaire"
Stephen Daldry, "The Reader"
David Fincher, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
Ron Howard, "Frost/Nixon"
Sam Mendes, "Revolutionary Road"
Best Screenplay
Simon Beaufoy, "Slumdog Millionaire"
David Hare, "The Reader"
Peter Morgan, "Frost/Nixon"
Eric Roth, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
John Patrick Shanley, "Doubt"
Best Original Song
"Down To Earth," "Wall-E"
"Gran Torino," "Gran Torino"
"I Thought I Lost You, "Bolt"
"Once in a Lifetime," "Cadillac Records"
"The Wrestler," "The Wrestler"
Best Original Score
Alexandre Desplat, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
Clint Eastwood, "Changeling"
James Newton Howard, "Defiance"
A.R. Rahman, "Slumdog Millionaire"
Hans Zimmer, "Frost/Nixon"
Best Animated Film
"Bolt"
"Kung Fu Panda"
"Wall-E"
Best Foreign Language Film
"The Baader Meinhof Complex"
"Everlasting Moments"
"Gomorrah"
"I've Loved You So Long"
"Waltz with Bashir"
Best TV Series, Drama
"Dexter"
"House"
"In Treatment"
"Mad Men"
"True Blood"
Best TV Series, Comedy
"30 Rock"
"Californication"
"Entourage"
"The Office"
"Weeds"
Best Miniseries or Movie
"A Raisin in the Sun"
"Bernard and Doris"
"Cranford"
"John Adams"
"Recount"
Best Actor, Drama Series
Gabriel Byrne, "In Treatment"
Michael C. Hall, "Dexter"
Jon Hamm, "Mad Men"
Hugh Laurie, "House"
Jonathan Rhys Meyers, "The Tudors"
Best Actress, Drama Series
Sally Field, "Brothers & Sisters"
Mariska Hargitay, "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit"
January Jones, "Mad Men"
Anna Paquin, "True Blood"
Kyra Sedgwick, "The Closer"
Best Actor, Comedy Series
Alec Baldwin, "30 Rock"
Steve Carrell, "The Office"
Kevin Connolly, "Entourage"
David Duchovny, "Californication"
Tony Shalhoub, "Monk"
Best Actress, Comedy Series
Christina Applegate, "Samantha Who?"
America Ferrerra, "Ugly Betty"
Tina Fey, "30 Rock"
Debra Messing, "The Starter Wife"
Mary-Louise Parker, "Weeds"
Best Actor, Miniseries or Movie
Ralph Fiennes, "Bernard & Doris"
Paul Giamatti, "Kevin Adams"
Kevin Spacey, "Recount"
Kiefer Sutherland, "24: Redemption"
Tom Wilkinson, "Recount"
Best Actress, Miniseries or Movie
Judi Dench, "Cranford"
Catherine Keener, "An American Crime"
Laura Linney, "John Adams"
Shirley Maclaine, "Coco Chanel"
Susan Sarandon, "Bernard and Doris"
Best Supporting Actor, Series, Miniseries or Movie
Neil Patrick Harris, "How I Met Your Mother"
Denis Leary, "Recount"
Jeremy Piven, "Entourage"
Blair Underwood, "In Treatment"
Tom Wilkinson, "John Adams"
Best Supporting Actress, Series, Miniseries or Movie
Eileen Atkins, "Cranford"
Laura Dern, "Recount"
Melissa George, "In Treatment"
Rachel Griffiths, "Brothers & Sisters"
Dianne Weist, "In Treatment"
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
What do you want, a cookie?
Tuesday morning I took the dog out and it was cold, not a biting cold but certainly a gnawing cold.I went to work in my huge down coat and gloves. Okay, work, work, work. I leave for lunch, I put on my huge down coat and gloves and head out the door, taking a moment before I stepped outside to prep myself for the slap in the face to come.
A caress. I was not cold. By the time I got out to my car I was warm. In December. Yesterday I went out to my car and it was cold and nasty and totally in character for December. It's just really strange. I left my coat in the car after lunch.
In the afternoon one of my co-workers looked out the window and said Is it cold out, it looks like its cold out, like it could snow... She was right. It looked cold, it wasn't but it did look really cold.
Funny story? my group is having our annual Christmas lunch on Thursday and Monday our boss sent out a notice about making phone numbers and other materials out so that the people standing in for us while we are at lunch won't be totally lost. Among her directives was that the intake people make their handsets for the phones available because the head sets might not be what our stand ins are interested in using. One of my friends came into my office and asked for help. She had looked everywhere in her office and she couldn't find her handset anywhere. She asked if I knew where her's could be because she had looked everywhere for it. I walked in to her office and glanced at the desk. Her handset was on her phone! I laughed. She ordered me to not tell anyone. I didn't tell anyone at work.
Time passed and I came home. Still warm. I made more cookies!
I still have at least one more batch to make but I'm feeling a lot better about the cookie project than I was. I'm getting a little over bacon/cheese/garlic but I am out of cheese and garlic so now so the next batch is just going to be bacon . I'm thinking of making a parsley batch. I would make a peanut butter batch and a batch of molasses but due to Doggers' Addison's she's not supposed to have extra potassium and peanut butter and molasses are both heavy with it. Sucks for Dogger, win for the other dogs that won't have to share.
It's still warm.
Tuesday morning I took the dog out and it was cold, not a biting cold but certainly a gnawing cold.I went to work in my huge down coat and gloves. Okay, work, work, work. I leave for lunch, I put on my huge down coat and gloves and head out the door, taking a moment before I stepped outside to prep myself for the slap in the face to come.
A caress. I was not cold. By the time I got out to my car I was warm. In December. Yesterday I went out to my car and it was cold and nasty and totally in character for December. It's just really strange. I left my coat in the car after lunch.
In the afternoon one of my co-workers looked out the window and said Is it cold out, it looks like its cold out, like it could snow... She was right. It looked cold, it wasn't but it did look really cold.
Funny story? my group is having our annual Christmas lunch on Thursday and Monday our boss sent out a notice about making phone numbers and other materials out so that the people standing in for us while we are at lunch won't be totally lost. Among her directives was that the intake people make their handsets for the phones available because the head sets might not be what our stand ins are interested in using. One of my friends came into my office and asked for help. She had looked everywhere in her office and she couldn't find her handset anywhere. She asked if I knew where her's could be because she had looked everywhere for it. I walked in to her office and glanced at the desk. Her handset was on her phone! I laughed. She ordered me to not tell anyone. I didn't tell anyone at work.
Time passed and I came home. Still warm. I made more cookies!
Larger cookies
I still have at least one more batch to make but I'm feeling a lot better about the cookie project than I was. I'm getting a little over bacon/cheese/garlic but I am out of cheese and garlic so now so the next batch is just going to be bacon . I'm thinking of making a parsley batch. I would make a peanut butter batch and a batch of molasses but due to Doggers' Addison's she's not supposed to have extra potassium and peanut butter and molasses are both heavy with it. Sucks for Dogger, win for the other dogs that won't have to share.
It's still warm.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Ace of Cookies
So many dog cookies. Lots and lots of dog cookies. Hundreds probably. And many more to come. Probably not hundreds to come, but at least dozens. The first batches were smaller cookies so now I have a small mountain of small cookies
Tuesday I will make larger by comparison cookies and I'll have small hills of larger by comparison cookies and then I'll have a mid-sized, yet still towering mountain of dog cookies. And at that point I will count them and separate them and bag them up and my veritable mountain of cookies will morph into manageable mole hills. And then I will take care of my Christmas cards, I could have done that job first, but then after thoroughly over-thinking the whole thing that involved an argument with myself about the cookies sitting around, separate from their cards, which disturbed me greatly, Gawd only knows why, I don't even know why - I could have done the cards and mailed the cards but then I would have to make cookies and mail the cookies and wouldn't it be more efficant if I could mail the cards with the cookies?
- Dog Cookies
So many dog cookies. Lots and lots of dog cookies. Hundreds probably. And many more to come. Probably not hundreds to come, but at least dozens. The first batches were smaller cookies so now I have a small mountain of small cookies
Tuesday I will make larger by comparison cookies and I'll have small hills of larger by comparison cookies and then I'll have a mid-sized, yet still towering mountain of dog cookies. And at that point I will count them and separate them and bag them up and my veritable mountain of cookies will morph into manageable mole hills. And then I will take care of my Christmas cards, I could have done that job first, but then after thoroughly over-thinking the whole thing that involved an argument with myself about the cookies sitting around, separate from their cards, which disturbed me greatly, Gawd only knows why, I don't even know why - I could have done the cards and mailed the cards but then I would have to make cookies and mail the cookies and wouldn't it be more efficant if I could mail the cards with the cookies?
Monday, December 8, 2008
Checking her list
I had a huge list of things to get done over the weekend and shhh don't tell anyone, I got them all done! I mentally made out my to-do list Friday night
I knew there were some things I really needed to get done sooner rather than later, my outside lights for example was a job I wanted to get done before Christmas. True, I put up significantly fewer strings up but I did haul out the Tomato Brace Tree and I had said I wasn't going to pull it out this year. it won the display lottery because it has LCD lights on it and I decided it wasn't going to cost as much to run as some of my many non-LCD strings. I was afraid the front of the house was going to look bare but with two trees inside, a spot on the door, the air-blown in the yard and the Tomato Brace Tree, I think it looks pretty full.
Lets see, before I could decorate the front of the house I had to blow the yard again. It was funnish, but I still can't believe that someone stole my rake, it just really pisses me off! Who would steal a rake? It's not like the street value of a rake is worth the stress of me screaming bloody murder and setting my dawg on you if I were to catch you doing it. I really do not think there is enough copper in a rake to make it worth stealing one right now, I don't think copper is actually worth stealing in it's purest form. Things suck all over, even for thieves. But anyway, yard blown, decorations pulled for attic, extension cords pulled from corners and inside the deep holes where they hide.
But even before I could work on the yard Sunday, I had more pressing business to attended to : Dogger needed to see Santa. Again. I took her Saturday to Petco and had her picture taken but it was really lousy. They tried real hard but it was just not a good picture. The scenery was on the wrong side of the lame set and most of the picture was of the adopt-a-cat crates and boxes of kitty litter, and Dogger wouldn't smile, she did rawk her green velvet jingle bell collar though.
I had a huge list of things to get done over the weekend and shhh don't tell anyone, I got them all done! I mentally made out my to-do list Friday night
- Shop for giftee
- outdoor decorations
- Dogger to Santa
- Dog Cookies
- Flea Market
- Leaf Blow Yard
- Gas up Minnie
I knew there were some things I really needed to get done sooner rather than later, my outside lights for example was a job I wanted to get done before Christmas. True, I put up significantly fewer strings up but I did haul out the Tomato Brace Tree and I had said I wasn't going to pull it out this year. it won the display lottery because it has LCD lights on it and I decided it wasn't going to cost as much to run as some of my many non-LCD strings. I was afraid the front of the house was going to look bare but with two trees inside, a spot on the door, the air-blown in the yard and the Tomato Brace Tree, I think it looks pretty full.
Lets see, before I could decorate the front of the house I had to blow the yard again. It was funnish, but I still can't believe that someone stole my rake, it just really pisses me off! Who would steal a rake? It's not like the street value of a rake is worth the stress of me screaming bloody murder and setting my dawg on you if I were to catch you doing it. I really do not think there is enough copper in a rake to make it worth stealing one right now, I don't think copper is actually worth stealing in it's purest form. Things suck all over, even for thieves. But anyway, yard blown, decorations pulled for attic, extension cords pulled from corners and inside the deep holes where they hide.
But even before I could work on the yard Sunday, I had more pressing business to attended to : Dogger needed to see Santa. Again. I took her Saturday to Petco and had her picture taken but it was really lousy. They tried real hard but it was just not a good picture. The scenery was on the wrong side of the lame set and most of the picture was of the adopt-a-cat crates and boxes of kitty litter, and Dogger wouldn't smile, she did rawk her green velvet jingle bell collar though.
a picture of the picture.
She did do really well in a strange place and a new situation and lots of people and lots of other dogs I worry about her since the Addison's as stress is very bad for her and new situations and other dogs are very stressful. It was a good trip though and many people told her she beautiful, she and I both like to hear that. Later on Saturday Alphagal and I went shopping and I was able to pick up some new cookbooks for my Giftee and I got a skirt, later Dogger and I went to the gas station and passer by gave Dogger a bad vibe. She didn't take her eyes off him until her was out of sight. There is a big difference between Dogger paying warm and fuzzy attention to you and how cold her undivided attention is. I bet Mr. Passer-bys' skin was crawling and he didn't know why.
Sunday I went to Petsmart for yet another Santa picture. Dogger was again the belle of the ball and everyone loved her. She had a great time too. She is going to be impossible to live with now, every-time I take her somewhere in the car she is going to be expecting to get treated like a princess and plied with cookies.
And? I started on dog cookies! Alphagal loaned me her incredibly awesome mixer and so far I have two batches in the dough stage. Yay! Two down and two or so to go.
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Friday, December 5, 2008
HA
OJ is finally going to jail, not for killing two people but for being an asshole. The penalty for asshole behavior in 2008 is "at least 15 years" . The dumb shit could have just played golf for the rest of his life and gotten away with murder.
OJ is finally going to jail, not for killing two people but for being an asshole. The penalty for asshole behavior in 2008 is "at least 15 years" . The dumb shit could have just played golf for the rest of his life and gotten away with murder.
Ms. Clause
And we have Secret Santa! it only took nine emails back and forth to get the dates figured out! Seriously, after email number five I was getting really stressed out about it. We decided among ourselves, i.e without the boss’ input, last week what the price limit was going to be and I don’t think that took any emails at all.
The good news is that I know my giftee! I was afraid it was going to be either the boss herself or the one intake person I don’t really know and her office is of no help whatsoever as it is decorated solely with pictures of her young daughter and herself. Nothing helpful about favorite colors or decorating schemes or collections . I was afraid it was going to be five days of progressively more cutesy I Luve My Mommy photo frames.
My giftee is an active, devoted Democrat, which is great and I can think of several suiatable items right off the top of my head but I’m not sure who else knows that about her and we aren’t supposed to give away who Santa is too early and I’m pretty sure I am the only one who knows that. So that’s a bust, I know she has a lot of older, home made looking tats, but I don’t know what kind of gift giving opportunities that makes available - She’s an RN so I don’t think she really needs a copy of Hep and You and she doesn’t decorate a tree so that knocks out suitable ornaments as gifts and she doesn’t seem to wear jewelry. She lives alone and doesn’t have pets, her kids are grown and away.
That covers the things she does not need or want. I do know she’s a good Democrat, that she’s diabetic, not real religious, she likes motorcycles, she’s into body art and has an interest in cooking and cookbooks and drinks a lot of water. I know for a fact she’s really devoted to giving to others at the holidays and does a lot of very generous but low profile holiday wish granting and meal supplying. I think I’m going to go with the interesting/antique cook book angle and look into Heifer International.
Ya’ll got any ideas what I can get for this lady that could be in my hot little hands between December 12-19?
And we have Secret Santa! it only took nine emails back and forth to get the dates figured out! Seriously, after email number five I was getting really stressed out about it. We decided among ourselves, i.e without the boss’ input, last week what the price limit was going to be and I don’t think that took any emails at all.
The good news is that I know my giftee! I was afraid it was going to be either the boss herself or the one intake person I don’t really know and her office is of no help whatsoever as it is decorated solely with pictures of her young daughter and herself. Nothing helpful about favorite colors or decorating schemes or collections . I was afraid it was going to be five days of progressively more cutesy I Luve My Mommy photo frames.
My giftee is an active, devoted Democrat, which is great and I can think of several suiatable items right off the top of my head but I’m not sure who else knows that about her and we aren’t supposed to give away who Santa is too early and I’m pretty sure I am the only one who knows that. So that’s a bust, I know she has a lot of older, home made looking tats, but I don’t know what kind of gift giving opportunities that makes available - She’s an RN so I don’t think she really needs a copy of Hep and You and she doesn’t decorate a tree so that knocks out suitable ornaments as gifts and she doesn’t seem to wear jewelry. She lives alone and doesn’t have pets, her kids are grown and away.
That covers the things she does not need or want. I do know she’s a good Democrat, that she’s diabetic, not real religious, she likes motorcycles, she’s into body art and has an interest in cooking and cookbooks and drinks a lot of water. I know for a fact she’s really devoted to giving to others at the holidays and does a lot of very generous but low profile holiday wish granting and meal supplying. I think I’m going to go with the interesting/antique cook book angle and look into Heifer International.
Ya’ll got any ideas what I can get for this lady that could be in my hot little hands between December 12-19?
My theory of decorating is Go Big Or Go Home
Thursday, December 4, 2008
My cousins' husband works at the Tilden Mine.
December 4, 2008
Cleveland Cliffs announces layoffs
MARQUETTE - Cliffs Natural Resources announced today more than 300 layoffs are likely in January and production at the Empire and Tilden mines in 2009 will be substantially reduced due to the downward spiral of the world economy and a reduced demand for steel and iron ore.
11/17/2008
Cliffs calls off merger
CHARLESTON, W.Va.—Cliffs Natural Resources' proposed $2.7 billion takeover of coal producer Alpha Natural Resources has been called off, the companies said Monday.
Terminating the deal is in the best interest of shareholders due to the faltering U.S. economy, uncertainty in the steel industry and other factors, the companies said in a joint news release. Cliffs agreed to pay Alpha a $70 million breakup fee. In turn, Alpha agreed to drop a lawsuit filed against Cliffs for unilaterally delaying a shareholder vote on the proposed acquisition.
July 16, 2008
Cliffs gets bigger with mining merger
St. Paul, Minn. — Cleveland-Cliffs says it's merging with Alpha Natural Resources, A Virginia-based coal operation with 57 coal mines and 11 coal preparation plants in four northern Appalachian states. The $10 billion cash and stock deal makes the new company, to be called Cliffs Natural Resources, a major player in iron mining and coal production. The coal mines give the company ownership of a key resource for making steel, and another product to sell.
December 4, 2008
Cleveland Cliffs announces layoffs
MARQUETTE - Cliffs Natural Resources announced today more than 300 layoffs are likely in January and production at the Empire and Tilden mines in 2009 will be substantially reduced due to the downward spiral of the world economy and a reduced demand for steel and iron ore.
11/17/2008
Cliffs calls off merger
CHARLESTON, W.Va.—Cliffs Natural Resources' proposed $2.7 billion takeover of coal producer Alpha Natural Resources has been called off, the companies said Monday.
Terminating the deal is in the best interest of shareholders due to the faltering U.S. economy, uncertainty in the steel industry and other factors, the companies said in a joint news release. Cliffs agreed to pay Alpha a $70 million breakup fee. In turn, Alpha agreed to drop a lawsuit filed against Cliffs for unilaterally delaying a shareholder vote on the proposed acquisition.
July 16, 2008
Cliffs gets bigger with mining merger
St. Paul, Minn. — Cleveland-Cliffs says it's merging with Alpha Natural Resources, A Virginia-based coal operation with 57 coal mines and 11 coal preparation plants in four northern Appalachian states. The $10 billion cash and stock deal makes the new company, to be called Cliffs Natural Resources, a major player in iron mining and coal production. The coal mines give the company ownership of a key resource for making steel, and another product to sell.
Pretty, shiny things
Well another evening another Christmas realted task off my list. I put together my Christmas cards! Woo! Now all I have to do it sign them and address, stamp and mail the lot of them! So really, I only started the whole project and it is a project. I got the dull part of the project finished so still, Yay me!
History of Christmas Cards
I also put my breakable ornaments on the top third of the tree. The tree was creeping me out all lit up and naked, it looked funny so I fixed it. The new tree is pre-lit, it's lit all over it, the whole tree, top to bottom. This is a new thing for tree's in my house. I have a cat, so it's been my habit for oh the last 10 years to not decorate or light the bottom several feet of tree. I learned this the hard way. Big tree, little kitten. Massive head ache. I learned my lesson and The Kitty seemed to learn his.
The tree has been up for a week but only now lit up regularly and covered with interesting shiny things. Thus far The Kitty seems to not be terribly interested in it yet. We shall see once the non-breakable ornaments go on the tree this weekend.
Well another evening another Christmas realted task off my list. I put together my Christmas cards! Woo! Now all I have to do it sign them and address, stamp and mail the lot of them! So really, I only started the whole project and it is a project. I got the dull part of the project finished so still, Yay me!
History of Christmas Cards
I also put my breakable ornaments on the top third of the tree. The tree was creeping me out all lit up and naked, it looked funny so I fixed it. The new tree is pre-lit, it's lit all over it, the whole tree, top to bottom. This is a new thing for tree's in my house. I have a cat, so it's been my habit for oh the last 10 years to not decorate or light the bottom several feet of tree. I learned this the hard way. Big tree, little kitten. Massive head ache. I learned my lesson and The Kitty seemed to learn his.
The tree has been up for a week but only now lit up regularly and covered with interesting shiny things. Thus far The Kitty seems to not be terribly interested in it yet. We shall see once the non-breakable ornaments go on the tree this weekend.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
No! Ho! Ho!
I had to take The Kitty back to the vet to pay my quarterly bribe in order to keep The Kitty's pred flowing - And they thought they had me, they think I feel bad about The Kitty making a lot of noise and being in general a bad patient, But I don't. I bought him a muzzle! He can't hurt them and they can't hurt me! That little piece of poly-ester is like a magic Guilt Shield! pre-muzzle, I felt really bad about his behavior and they were threatening me with Kitty sedation every time I had to bring him in, Now? Granting that they are fluent in catese? The only thing getting hurt is their feelings and they get paid well enough to sooth that.
They brought The Kitty out to me and I was visiting with the vet tech and she casually suggested that this time we run the pricey full blood panel instead of whatever cheaper test we normally run and I, not so casually said No, maybe next time. I credit a day spent listening to The Kenny G Christmas Album for this burst of aggression. I In honor of spending the whole entire day listening to The Kenny G Christmas Album, I bring you a real Christmas carol.
Mom got drunk and Dad got drunk
At our Christmas party
We were drinkin' champagne punch
And homemade eggnog
Little sister brought her new boyfriend
He was a Mexican
We didn't know what to think of him
'Til he sang Feliz Navidad
Feliz Navidad
Brother Ken brought his kids with him
The three from his first wife Lynn
And the two identical twins
From his second wife MaryNell
Of course he brought his new wife Kaye
Who talks all about AA
Chain smokin' while the stereo plays
Noel, Noel, The first Noel
Carve the turkey turn the ball game on
Mix margaritas when the eggnog's gone
Send somebody to the Quik-Pak store
We need some ice and an extension cord
A can of bean dip and some Diet Rite
A box of tampons and some Marlboro Lights
Hallelujah everybody say cheese
Merry Christmas from the family
Fran and Rita drove from Harlingen
I can't remember how I'm kin to them
But when they tried to plug their motorhome in
They blew our Christmas lights
Cousin David knew just what went wrong
So we all waited on our front lawn
He threw the breaker and the lights came on
And we sang Silent Night
Oh Silent Night
Carve the turkey turn the ball game on
Mix margaritas when the eggnog's gone
Send somebody to the Quik-Pak store
We need some ice and an extension cord
A can of bean dip and some Diet Rite
A box of tampons and some Marlboro Lights
Hallelujah everybody say cheese
Merry Christmas from the family
Carve the turkey turn the ballgame on
Make Bloody Marys cause we all want one
Send somebody to the Stop 'n Go
We need some celery and a can of fake snow
A bag of lemons and some Diet Sprite
A box of tampons and some Salem Lights
Hallelujah everybody say cheese
Merry Christmas from the family
Oh, and I came home and got most of my interior Christmas decorating done. Thank You Kenny G!
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
All that glitters...
Yesterday morning I wanted a coke. I Really, really wanted a coke, I needed a coke. The kind of Coke-want that drinking water or even eating something is not going to smother.
I have two lines of defense against these moments.
1) I don't carry cash and no cash means no change which means no coke.
2) The coke machine is right outside my bosses office.
These have worked for me. The machines thus far (Thank Gawd) don't accept plastic and I don't really need my boss to see me slacking off and getting sodas all day every day. If I really need a soda I walk to other side of the building and take the elevator down to the basemment and then go to the machine and then take the elevator back upstairs, walk back across the building and go back to my desk. It's a lot of work for a coke. But Monday, I wanted a coke and my boss was not in and I had change, but I didn't have exact change so I took three quarters and went down to the machine.
And.
I put my money into the machine and punched the coke button. Nothing. The machine spit out one of my quarters. Bitch, I said. I tried again, this time putting the money in quickly and immediately hammering the coke button. Nada. Now I was really pissed. I tried again - Take it! Take it! Take it! and nothing happened. I don't know why I kept trying. But I did. Over and over. I put the quarters in different orders, I put them in slowly, I put them quickly, I pushed the coke button as I was putting them in.
I was waiting for a new machine gremlin to come on duty and maybe one that wasn't such a stickler and then my quarters would be acceptable and I could get my coke. With coke machines and their gremlins, it just depends on who is on duty when you come through, some are real bastards and some don't care. I was willing to wait for a shift change.
It did not occur to me to go get a dollar bill, even if it had, that would have been tantamount to bending to the machines will and I wasn't going to let it get the upper hand. Eventually I got tired of this and the urge for a coke passed. I went back to work and eventually went to lunch where I got a Mr. Pibb.
Time passed. I needed a Coke, a real coke. I wanted it and I wanted it now and surely, there had been a shift change in the machine and by now I should be able to get a coke. So I went back and fed the machine my quarters. Whatever gremlin was in charge of quarters was still on duty! This time I didn't give it another chance and on my way out I dropped one of my quarters. It sounded funny when it fell. I picked it up and looked at and it didn't look right either. It was not the right color and the edges were wrong. I dropped it again and I dropped one of the others. the dull quarter sounded like a quarter, the shiny quarter didn't. I went to my computer to look up Mr. Shiny 1964 quarter. No wonder the machine wouldn't take it. it didn't taste or feel right.
Maybe someday some one who doesn't know their history will decide to corner the silver market and I'll be able to retire. I'll buy stock in coke.
Yesterday morning I wanted a coke. I Really, really wanted a coke, I needed a coke. The kind of Coke-want that drinking water or even eating something is not going to smother.
I have two lines of defense against these moments.
1) I don't carry cash and no cash means no change which means no coke.
2) The coke machine is right outside my bosses office.
These have worked for me. The machines thus far (Thank Gawd) don't accept plastic and I don't really need my boss to see me slacking off and getting sodas all day every day. If I really need a soda I walk to other side of the building and take the elevator down to the basemment and then go to the machine and then take the elevator back upstairs, walk back across the building and go back to my desk. It's a lot of work for a coke. But Monday, I wanted a coke and my boss was not in and I had change, but I didn't have exact change so I took three quarters and went down to the machine.
And.
I put my money into the machine and punched the coke button. Nothing. The machine spit out one of my quarters. Bitch, I said. I tried again, this time putting the money in quickly and immediately hammering the coke button. Nada. Now I was really pissed. I tried again - Take it! Take it! Take it! and nothing happened. I don't know why I kept trying. But I did. Over and over. I put the quarters in different orders, I put them in slowly, I put them quickly, I pushed the coke button as I was putting them in.
I was waiting for a new machine gremlin to come on duty and maybe one that wasn't such a stickler and then my quarters would be acceptable and I could get my coke. With coke machines and their gremlins, it just depends on who is on duty when you come through, some are real bastards and some don't care. I was willing to wait for a shift change.
It did not occur to me to go get a dollar bill, even if it had, that would have been tantamount to bending to the machines will and I wasn't going to let it get the upper hand. Eventually I got tired of this and the urge for a coke passed. I went back to work and eventually went to lunch where I got a Mr. Pibb.
Time passed. I needed a Coke, a real coke. I wanted it and I wanted it now and surely, there had been a shift change in the machine and by now I should be able to get a coke. So I went back and fed the machine my quarters. Whatever gremlin was in charge of quarters was still on duty! This time I didn't give it another chance and on my way out I dropped one of my quarters. It sounded funny when it fell. I picked it up and looked at and it didn't look right either. It was not the right color and the edges were wrong. I dropped it again and I dropped one of the others. the dull quarter sounded like a quarter, the shiny quarter didn't. I went to my computer to look up Mr. Shiny 1964 quarter. No wonder the machine wouldn't take it. it didn't taste or feel right.
Maybe someday some one who doesn't know their history will decide to corner the silver market and I'll be able to retire. I'll buy stock in coke.
Monday, December 1, 2008
Christmas is now in 24 days
Man, I need a few days at work I’m bushed! . There’s nothing like a few days off in a row to really leave you wrung out! I'm going to need a few days of R&R at my desk to recover.
I don’t think I stopped moving the whole time. Three malls, four melted credit cards, six bags and one pair of busted shoes. I did my part for the economy. The mail man is going to put his back out bringing my credit cards bills home to roost but I did finished all my shopping. Knock wood. I’m done with all the family gifts but I’m not entirely done because we haven’t started Secret Santa at work yet, and I haven’t started my dog cookies yet or wrapped anything or even started Christmas cards and I have one friend who is still gift-less, but I’m calling it “finished” because the hard part is finished. Now I have to figure out how to wrap an elephant.
Secret Santa is either going to be very easy or very hard. I have a pretty good idea of five days worth of gifties for just about everyone who is going to participate but there is a wild card who I know nothing about, I know she’s a Master of Social Work and has a young child but that is the sum total of what I know about her. I’m hoping I get someone else, any one else but I know I’m going to get her because that’s the way it works, I know I’m not going to get one of the three women I could Secret Santa in my sleep, because that would be too easy and Gawd forbid Secret Santa be easy.
I could just go to Poverty Barn and pick up five seasonal thingies and leave it there. That would be easy and fast and cheap. But nooooo! I can’t have that! I want to get them things they may actually want and to be honest, how many Christmas thingies does anyone really want? December 26 that stuff goes from cute to trash really fast. I mean if you are a Snowman person you don’t want Santas and if you are an Angel person a Penguin is going to leave you cold. And does anyone actually want napkin rings? I mean really? It’s a paper napkin world people! And how about kicky place cards? I see them all over the place in stores but I don’t think I have ever seen them in person except at very fancy wedding receptions and you know, those weren’t “kicky” if memory serves.
I guess they are marketed as hostess gifts but do you really want to eat dinner with some one who would actually use them? Hi! There are four of us and four chairs! Find your place! NO! You can’t eat there, you eat there, that is your chair! You? You are here! Not there, No!. I think I’d worry about why it was so important that I ate in that chair...
Speaking dog cookies. I did a little prep-work on them and finally settled on a container for them. It’s a big step, trust me. I looked at catalogues, I shopped online and I looked through stores. I finally found a good candidate I, brought them home and took them out. It turns out they are too small and the first one tore when I touched it. No, I don’t have the receipt. Why would I save that? Gah. But on the upside, Alphagal is going to let me use her super-duper high end electric mixer and that is going to make a lot of difference in the time it takes to put the cookies together and I bet I get a better quality dough in the process. I’m very stoked.
Man, I need a few days at work I’m bushed! . There’s nothing like a few days off in a row to really leave you wrung out! I'm going to need a few days of R&R at my desk to recover.
I don’t think I stopped moving the whole time. Three malls, four melted credit cards, six bags and one pair of busted shoes. I did my part for the economy. The mail man is going to put his back out bringing my credit cards bills home to roost but I did finished all my shopping. Knock wood. I’m done with all the family gifts but I’m not entirely done because we haven’t started Secret Santa at work yet, and I haven’t started my dog cookies yet or wrapped anything or even started Christmas cards and I have one friend who is still gift-less, but I’m calling it “finished” because the hard part is finished. Now I have to figure out how to wrap an elephant.
Secret Santa is either going to be very easy or very hard. I have a pretty good idea of five days worth of gifties for just about everyone who is going to participate but there is a wild card who I know nothing about, I know she’s a Master of Social Work and has a young child but that is the sum total of what I know about her. I’m hoping I get someone else, any one else but I know I’m going to get her because that’s the way it works, I know I’m not going to get one of the three women I could Secret Santa in my sleep, because that would be too easy and Gawd forbid Secret Santa be easy.
I could just go to Poverty Barn and pick up five seasonal thingies and leave it there. That would be easy and fast and cheap. But nooooo! I can’t have that! I want to get them things they may actually want and to be honest, how many Christmas thingies does anyone really want? December 26 that stuff goes from cute to trash really fast. I mean if you are a Snowman person you don’t want Santas and if you are an Angel person a Penguin is going to leave you cold. And does anyone actually want napkin rings? I mean really? It’s a paper napkin world people! And how about kicky place cards? I see them all over the place in stores but I don’t think I have ever seen them in person except at very fancy wedding receptions and you know, those weren’t “kicky” if memory serves.
I guess they are marketed as hostess gifts but do you really want to eat dinner with some one who would actually use them? Hi! There are four of us and four chairs! Find your place! NO! You can’t eat there, you eat there, that is your chair! You? You are here! Not there, No!. I think I’d worry about why it was so important that I ate in that chair...
Speaking dog cookies. I did a little prep-work on them and finally settled on a container for them. It’s a big step, trust me. I looked at catalogues, I shopped online and I looked through stores. I finally found a good candidate I, brought them home and took them out. It turns out they are too small and the first one tore when I touched it. No, I don’t have the receipt. Why would I save that? Gah. But on the upside, Alphagal is going to let me use her super-duper high end electric mixer and that is going to make a lot of difference in the time it takes to put the cookies together and I bet I get a better quality dough in the process. I’m very stoked.
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